Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #214 December 20th, 1999 The Opening Word: Vince Russo is slowly going nuts. I caught a bit of his WCW Live appearance last week, and read reports of the overall interview. The most notable thing to come out of it is the fact that he can't take any criticism whatsoever. Replying to Dave Meltzer calling him "retarded" (which actually isn't true--Meltzer said the booking involving Tank Abbott was retarded), Russo called Meltzer a "jackass". He then went off on a rant about Meltzer being a mark for himself, and that he's a lowly sheet writer, while *Vince Russo* is the head writer for WCW. Geez, talk about the pot calling the kettle black! (In an interesting side note, Meltzer's main rival Wade Keller criticized Dave for using the word "retarded", saying "It's insensitive, classless, and shows a real lack of vocabulary." Bob Ryder weighed in with his thoughts as well, of course defending Russo ... overlooking the fact that Russo called Meltzer a "jackass". Do ANY of these people actually listen to anything they're saying?) Russo went on to lay blame on WCW's sagging ratings everywhere but where it counted--himself. He blamed most of WCW's woes on "Standards & Practices" coming in and preventing him from doing what he'd like to do. Examples given were no women vs. men matches, and not being able to call Rhonda Singh "fat" for fear of offending fat people. No doubt you're thinking to yourself "how does not being able to call Rhonda "fat" actually *hurt* the ratings?" As Meltzer pointed out, on the show which so angered Russo, nothing Standards & Practices has done has actually prevented an angle or storyline which would have, you know, DRAWN VIEWERS. As if WCW is floundering in the ratings because they don't have Lenny & Lodi on TV. The only thing "handcuffing" Russo is his inability to come up with a storyline, angle or gimmick that interests the fans. It's very telling that the only way Russo thinks he can draw in viewers is with T&A and controversial angles. Clearly he's given up on attempts at solid storytelling and good wrestling matches. But if he brings in the Ultimate Warrior, that'll turn everything around, right? Responding to criticisms that Starrcade didn't get a decent build-up, Russo said all the big storylines are going to come out of the PPV. Maybe it's just me, but does it make sense to save everything for a show whose build-up was so poor that you've guaranteed no one will watch it? (and then screw over those few who do buy it by turning it into a commercial for Nitro?) Bob Ryder wrote "It's easy to be a 'Monday Morning Quarterback', and I guess everybody wants to be one these days." No Bob ... all we want is a WCW that's worth our damn time to watch. Vince Russo hasn't given us that yet, and your cheerleading assurances aside, we haven't yet seen any sign he's capable of doing that. We were supposed to be fair and give him six months to turn things around. Well, we're more than a third of a way into those six months, and things aren't getting better, they're getting worse. That's why Dave Meltzer (who I don't always agree with) has been critical of Russo's booking. Whether it's good wrestling, engaging storylines, interesting characters, or a simple idea that could draw fans and business for WCW, Russo has failed to deliver on all counts. He claims to be saving all the good stuff for the Starrcade PPV, yet completely failed to do anything to interest fans in seeing that PPV. No matter what he has in mind it will have to be presented to fans on a Monday night against a red-hot WWF. ("Monday Night Football" also features a monster game between Minnesota and Green Bay, with divisional control and playoff survival on the line.) Russo's failure to make Starrcade a "must see" show works more against his objectives than any "Standards & Practices" or second-guessing from critics. It's easy to go on the offensive against your critics when your company is floundering, and blame some of that poor performance on said critics. I think what WCW is overlooking, though, is that most of those critics are just fans. Guys like myself, Dave Meltzer--in fact most of those writing negatively about WCW on the Internet--we're all just fans. We want to see WCW be good again. Vince Russo needs to step back, take a breath, and do a little bit of assessment. He needs to figure out who WCW's audience is, and what kind of show he can put on to appeal to that audience. Thus far he's been trying to take a G-rated company and put on a PG-rated show, desperately trying to convince us it's hotter than the PG-13/R-rated WWF. I myself said, from day one, that Russo was probably the wrong man to run WCW. His writing style has been completely incompatible with what WCW is capable of doing. Not only has he failed to attract WWF fans or totally new viewers, he's been slowly alienating existing WCW fans. So with all this in mind, we turn our attention to Starrcade. WCW had been promising a home run with this show. Well, reviews have been somewhat favorable, and a couple matches praised for the hard work of the wrestlers involved, but in general it seemed to be an average-to-good show which relied upon its main event to make it either "hit" or "miss". In a finish straight out of the WWF's "Montreal Screwjob", "Rowdy" Roddy Piper interjected himself in the match and declared Bret "Hitman" Hart the winner the moment he put Goldberg in the Sharpshooter. And that was it. No earth shattering angle, no major surprise, just a rehash of an angle that wasn't an angle to begin with, but has been turned into an angle repeatedly by the WWF over the last two years. It made no sense to the fans in general, and was designed to make fans tune in to Nitro to get the explanation. Was Piper acting on his own? Did he sell out to the Powers That Be? Were he and Bret Hart in cahoots? Or was it that Piper did what he did to prevent Goldberg from winning, because Goldberg has some dark secret yet to be revealed? These are really the only storyline options. Which way WCW takes it will determine how wise it was to dredge up the Montreal finish one more time. A real feeling of ill will has been fostered on the part of the fans here with the PPV finish. Will WCW win them back, or was this just the latest in a long line of booking moves destined for failure? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WCW Monday Nitro: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Three Hours+. Location: Baltimore, Maryland. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - Video package from Starrcade. - Madusa and Spice make their way to the ring. Madusa doesn't merely have boobs--she has gazongas! Spice, meanwhile, has neither. Anyway, Madusa talks about the superiority of women. She then spots Buzzkill in the crowd and calls him in for a match. MADUSA vs. BUZZKILL A few moves in Buzzkill LOSES HIS WEAVE! Spice cozies up to the ref and throws a foreign object to Madusa. She clocks Buzzkill, then puts him away with the German Suplex. The Powers That Be talk about Hugh Morrus (he'll face Curt Hennig tonight) and Roddy Piper. Speaking of whom, Piper shows up, with his kid and hairy wife. I mean, oops--whoever that guys is. Looks like Bart Sawyer from Music City Wrestling. - Creative Control tell Piper he's wanted. Somebody in a "Scream" mask attacks Shane (Vincent) with a lead pipe backstage. - HUGH MORRUS vs. CURT HENNIG Morrus walks out of the match when his elderly, confused, hospital gown wearing father wanders out to the ring. WHAT THE F*@$?! Morrus is now off his game, and eventually falls victim to the Hennig-Plex. Morrus' dad comes back out to console him. Freakin' weird. Russo, in front of Piper's kid, says "I'm an asshole!", then orders Piper to go out and tell the fans that he (Piper) sold out. Piper launches into a rant, which I'd talk about, but WCW has the crowd noise cranked so loud that you can barely tell what he's talking about. I think he's bragging about how long he's been wrestling. He, Hulk Hogan and MTV made wrestling. (Huh?) Piper says he's going to go stick his kid out in the car under guard, then come back in and shoot with Russo's "condom head geeks!" - Schiavone actually explains what the "Montreal Screwjob" is, mentioning Vince McMahon and the WWF. He goes on to add a bit of fiction, saying some backstage feel it was WWF writer and current PTB, Vince Russo, who originally scripted that finish. Wow. Just how much past WWF history is this company going to use to sell their current storylines? They the speculate about Piper (and/or the Powers That Be) screwing Goldberg. Heenan thinks Piper sold out. Tenay says Piper is a man of integrity. - Kevin Nash comes out to "shoot". He says "the Boys" never screw one another (ha!). He says it's "the Boys" versus "the Office". Nash says "the Office doesn't give a shit about us!" and "the son-of-a-bitches don't even give us Social Security!" None of this is bleeped. "What happened at Starrcade was bullshit!" Nash says Hart "screwed one of the boys." "You say you're 'the Best There Is, the Best there Was, and the Best There Ever Will Be' ... well, you're nothing but a piece of shit!" His tirade complete, they "hurriedly" cut to a commercial. Ooh--swearing! That'll turn the ratings around real quick. I'll be interested in hearing Bob Ryder's defense of all this. (He'll probably just say "well, the WWF did it first.") [UPDATE: Bob says the profanity was pre-scripted, and that TNT was aware of this and was supposed to bleep it all out. So that makes it all okay?] By the way, this whole "shoot" is so absurd when you realize that it was Nash, as head booker, who did more than anything to ruin this company and hold wrestlers down this past summer. Maybe as one of "the Boys" he didn't screw the others over, but as booker and part of "the Office", Nash screwed guys over left and right. That's the problem with WCW's "shoots": the regular fans don't understand them, and the "smart" fans, who are supposed to be so impressed, know what's being said is all fictitious crap! - "During the break" footage shows Bret Hart arriving. Creative Control tell "Mean" Gene Okerlund that Nash shouldn't speak for everyone, and that Nash is one of the biggest politicians backstage there is. - JERRY FLYNN vs. TANK ABBOTT This is "no DQ", so the ref is almost immediately knocked out, and the fight is stopped because of it. Whatever. Security comes in and Flynn and Abbott nail them. The fans boo as security split the two apart and handcuff Flynn. The "match" lasted about ten seconds. Goldberg arrives. - The Revolution are out to cut a promo. Saturn says "ass". Apparently the wrestlers have been told to go out and swear up a storm. Douglas says "ass" too. Douglas orders "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan to come out and renounce his U.S. citizenship. Duggan comes out, but refuses to do it, saying he lied when he agreed to that stipulation. Duggan is stomped into the mat. Some of what Douglas is saying is now getting bleeped. Dean Malenko prepares to burn an American flag. Cue the music of the Filthy Animals, and they limp to the ring. Lots of crowd heat for all this. There's Roddy Piper and his son. - Piper's out. He goes into a rant about how he can no longer take part in the "circus" that Vince Russo is running in WCW. He basically says what he used to do is real, but the stuff Vince Russo has the WCW wrestlers doing, that's all fake. So he quits. He begins to walk out ... HOUR TWO Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. ... but Goldberg cuts him off. They have a touching moment, which is interrupted by the arrival of Bret Hart. Hart says he knows all about being screwed, and says that as far as he's concerned, he's no longer the WCW Champion. He'll go give it to Russo and tell him to shove it up his ass. - Hart confronts Russo (why bother with this "Powers That Be" nonsense anymore?) Calling the belt a "piece of crap", Hart (family man, Canadian legend and outspoken critic of the "adult direction" the WWF took) calls Russo a "piece of shit!" (Bret is such a whore for his career. Wait until he loses the belt, then he'll shoot all over WCW for being such filth.) Russo says he ordered Piper to end the PPV match as a way of paying Piper back for the Montreal Screwjob. Hart isn't appreciative of the gesture, so Russo orders Hart to defend the belt against Goldberg later tonight. Hart says something like "stick it straight up your ass, you piece of shit!", which is the first thing that gets bleeped. Let me just interject here that Hart has now pretty much lost all ability to complain about Montreal anymore. Not only have they credited Vince Russo instead of Vince McMahon as the driving force behind the screwjob (in the eyes of the general fans), Hart has also turned the whole thing into an angle, which loses any credibility he had with the "smart" fans. Vince McMahon is no longer the villain, Vince Russo is, and Hart can't talk about it in the negative anymore because he's making an angle of it, using it to further his career. It may have been a dark period of his life then, but he's clearly over it now (and if he isn't, he has no one to blame but himself for allowing it to be continually dredged up). - NORMAN SMILEY/MENG vs. FIT FINLAY/BRIAN KNOBBS This one goes all the way from the ring area to the bathrooms, and lasted forever. Smiley's womanly act is funny, but that's the only appeal here. Meng hasn't figured out that Norman is his partner, so he attacks him. Smiley has to help Finlay and Knobbs fight him. Smiley gets pinned after his head is stuffed in a toilet. Piper kisses his son goodbye, picks up his bat, and heads out to do some business. There's Prince Iaukea, recording a song or something. How am I supposed to react when Iaukea and WCW are both taking this incredibly lame angle so seriously? - THE MAESTRO (w/ Symphony) vs. EVAN KARAGIAS The Maestro wins here when Symphony takes a bump from Karagias. Evan goes to check on her, and the Maestro rolls him up for the pin. Turns out Symphony was faking. Evan just has no luck with women. Notice how the PTB's office always looked the same? That's because it was a set, which Piper destroys. Yes, all those past shots of Creative Control standing outside the PTB office were FAKE, as were the shots of people trying to get in. Just random doors in the various arenas. WCW is no longer a wrestling promotion, it's a TV show, and the actors are revolting (read that any way you like). - Chavo Guerrero offers Evan Karagias a copy of "How To Pick Up Chicks". Evan pounds on him. - CHRIS "CHAMPAGNE" KANYON vs. BAM BAM BIGELOW vs. DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE Kanyon's gimmick is that he now brags about being in Hollywood. DDP and Bigelow (who both lost in singles matches to Kanyon last week) team up to take him out. DDP then turns on Bigelow and plants him with the Diamond Cutter. Page walks out. Kanyon's manager Mr. Biggs tries to hand him a briefcase as a weapon, but the ref intercepts it. As he's tied up, Kanyon grabs a champagne bottle at ringside and bashes it over Bigelow's head. Bigelow is busted open. Kanyon scores the pin. There's Kevin Nash. - PPV stills of Sting being injured by Lex Luger. Sting will be out several weeks. - CREATIVE CONTROL vs. THE OUTSIDERS Scott Hall comes out on crutches. Nash takes a beating for a few moments, until Hall comes in and starts swinging away with the crutch. Injury or not, the guy looks just fine. No winner--not really even a match. Lex Luger is up in the rafters dressed as Sting. Liz is there too. There's Chris Benoit. HOUR THREE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - JEFF JARRETT vs. CHRIS BENOIT This is a "Ladder match", but they actually spend most of their time doing spots with a chair. Benoit quickly gets the upper hand and tries to go for the suspended belt, but someone has tampered with the ladder. All the rungs keep breaking. (At least that's what's supposed to be happening: actually they didn't rig the ladder well enough, so Benoit has to really abuse it to get some of the steps to break. I actually thought Benoit was breaking the ladder so Jarrett couldn't use it.) Jarrett clobbers Benoit with a guitar. (Benoit looks really bad here, hunkering down to receive the guitar shot well before Jarrett delivers it. He stands there looking like a turtle trying to pull its head back in the shell!) Jarrett then pulls another ladder out from under the ring and retrieves the belt, becoming the new U.S. Champion. A neat angle with the ladder, and the match was okay, but I can't imagine this was anywhere near as good as the one on the PPV, which I would think pissed Benoit fans off. "Mean" Gene thinks Jarrett doctored the ladder. Jarrett swears. Curt Hennig then appears and says Russo wants to see Jarrett in his limo. - THE WALL (w/ Berlyn) vs. SID VICIOUS I hate when guys split up, and we all know they've split up, but the promotion takes forever to make it official. Early on it's all Sid, beating on the Wall in and out of the ring. Berlyn distracts him a few times, allowing the Wall to get in some offense. Berlyn then tries a drop-kick, but hits the Wall instead. DQ. The Wall and Sid make goofy faces at each other, then shake hands. Sid's antics here are straight out of Hulk Hogan's playbook circa 1986. The only thing he doesn't do is cup his hand to his ear to listen to the fans' cheers. There's half of Vince Russo, seated in his limo and telling Jeff Jarrett that something big he couldn't tell him about before is coming down later tonight. Jarrett is shocked, but immensely pleased. Yup, someone's turning heel tonight. - Disco Inferno is brought before Tony Marinara's dad, played by some generic Italian actor. Disco can either La Familia, or end up in a coma. Where is this taking place, how are we seeing it, and why would the Mob allow their private business to be filmed and broadcast? - THE VARSITY CLUB (w/ "Leia Meow") vs. HARLEM HEAT "Leia Meow" is Kimona Wanalaya's imaginative new name. She's hot, but no more so than the twenty other women on wrestling TV right now. Kevin Sullivan, Rock Steiner and Mike Rotunda take turns doing color commentary at the desk. Rotunda looks okay in the ring, but that doesn't excuse the fact that I was content if I never saw the guy again. Same goes for Sullivan. I'd really like to hear WCW's explanation for all this, I really would. The match lasts forever, with Midnight showing up late in the match to argue with Stevie Ray. Rotunda rolls Stevie up from behind for the pin. They bring back the Varsity Club ... and split up Harlem Heat. Meltzer's right--this IS retarded. That's a joke. Then out of nowhere PG-13 attack the Varsity Club. "PG-13" is Wolfie D and J.C. Ice--known to most newer wrestling fans as the rappers for the Nation of Dmonination in the WWF. They've also been in ECW, and are mainstays on the Memphis wrestling scene. J.C. Ice is Jamie Dundee, son of "Superstar" Bill Dundee. This background info, by the way, is probably a whole hell of a lot more interesting than these guys really are. If you still don't know them, think of a cross between the Insane Clown posse and Too Cool. David Flair's girlfriend gets hit on by Jerry Only of the Misfits backstage. She knees him in the nads, then bites his nose. Vampiro and the others look concerned as she runs away giggling. This show has really sucked so far. - David Flair and his Gal hit the ring. There they go nuts, knock out announcer David Penzer with a crowbar, then call out Vampiro. Vampiro comes out, ostensibly to smooth things over, but then he stupidly turns his back and badmouths Flair. *Whank!* Jerry Only suffers the same fate when he tries to make the save. I'm no fan of Vampiro, but even I think he deserves better than this. - The Misfits go into spasms as the EMT's check them over. - "Mean" Gene is out to interview Buff Bagwell. Ah, shit, here we go again. Bagwell delivers a pedestrian interview. Okerlund then not-too-subtly moves on to the whole Kimberly thing, and Bagwell's fight backstage with DDP. Points to WCW for finally explaining this to the fans--minus points for it being such a tired angle. Bagwell acts like he doesn't want to talk about it, but quickly enough starts "hubba-hubba-ing" over what a hottie she is. Out comes DDP and the "real" fight is on. This angle has a problem in that DDP's role in WCW right now is so muddled. He's, at best, a "tweener", battling David Flair as a babyface, but also fighting Sting as a heel. Bagwell is a babyface the fans don't care much about, and his position here is the heel meddling in DDP's marriage. DDP should be the babyface fighting for the honor of his wife, but he's coming off as the heel. It's all a mess. WCW could make this work if they 1) pull DDP out of all the other angles/feuds he's in, and 2) have Kimberly appear on TV to stand by her man. Make Bagwell an outright heel too. No matter how they do it, though, this is all really just a rehash of what DDP did earlier this year with Scott Steiner. Roddy Piper is saying his goodbyes to the lockerroom. Piper The Actor takes over, delivering a soliloquy regarding the Writers trying to make phonies out of the wrestlers in WCW, and how they need to band together and demand higher wages and medical insurance and job security. WORKERS OF THE WORLD UNITE! Piper wishes them a Merry Christmas and leaves. This lengthy bit was just brutal on the live crowd, judging from their vocal reaction, clearly heard in the background as the piece dragged on. Jeff Jarrett settles in to watch the main event on a monitor. - BRET "HITMAN" HART vs. GOLDBERG Goldberg's entrance takes us well past the top of the hour. Whatever we've had to sit through this whole awful show for better happen soon. Hart and Goldberg lock up, and for a few minutes engage in an okay match. Cue the Outsiders, carrying Scott Hall's crutches. Looks like they've come to nail Hart, who screwed Goldberg over at the PPV. But wait ... they hit Goldberg instead. And Hart joins in! Hart covers, at which point Roddy Piper comes in. Piper lays in some weak shots on Hart, then covers Goldberg to save him from further damage. The ref, bumped just before the Outsiders came in, makes a three count, giving ... Piper ... the win?! Chalk it up to usual WCW incompetence, as Hart is declared the winner. I guess the belt was really considered vacant, so Hart is now WCW Champ for the second time. In comes Jarrett to deliver the redundant guitar shot on Piper. Now he has some spraypaint, and squiggles some incomprehensible lines on Piper and Goldberg's backs. Schiavone deciphers it for us: "it's the NWO!" "N ... W ... O" barks the PA system, and their music fires up. The NWO is back and better(?) than ever, holding the World, U.S. and Tag Team Titles (TV Title too if Hall is still recognized as the champ). We've run way over the usual finish time, as Vince Russo's master plan is finally revealed. - This Thursday: Nothing announced. - Next week: New Year's Evil. Comments: Well, there you go. Is it what *you* were expecting? Or hoping for? The big change in direction for WCW is ... the return of the NWO. Not exactly an original idea. Nor is turning Bret Hart heel for that matter. (Remember when Hart was a member of the NWO before, but wouldn't admit it, saying he never wore the official t-shirt?) Not that this is a disaster by any means. It all played out very well, and for the first time in a long time they were able to build up to the end of the show. We knew something was coming, I just don't think anyone guessed exactly what. Hart turning heel was the main assumption by almost everyone going into the show. Myself, I though maybe Piper had screwed Goldberg because he knew Goldberg was secretly in cahoots with the Powers That Be. That would have been an interesting angle, in my opinion. Turns out I was almost right, I just picked the wrong guy. WCW went the obvious route (and probably the better one, moneywise) by turning Hart. But bringing the NWO back, I dunno. Can't say as I'm excited about that at all. We all know the NWO, well before it died a miserable, ignominious death, was just a lame merchandising gimmick. The NWO stopped meaning anything storywise probably more than a year before it died. The NWO also never paid off in the storylines because no one ever really beat it. None of the major heels of the NWO suffered significant defeats, and instead all turned face and left the group, causing it to slowly dwindle away and die. Egos prevented the NWO storyline from reaching a satisfactory conclusion. Now it's back, and already one can see major problems ahead. For starters, who's running it? Is Hart the leader, Nash, or will the Powers That Be be calling all the shots? And who will put an end to the NWO? Will Goldberg be the hero, will Hulk Hogan return to take them down, or will it be another case of everyone leaving the group, killing it off that way, cheating the fans of an emotional or interesting payoff? Already I'm troubled by the fact that Nash has once again finagled his way into a main event storyline. The guy just can't work, and refuses to play a straight-up heel, so once again he manipulates the story so as to put himself in a position where he has power, gets to act cool on TV, etc. With this new NWO needing time to establish itself, you can damn well guarantee he won't be doing any jobs for months. He was given the choice role this week, doing the "shoot" interview, swerving the fans by appearing to turn babyface, then making the show-closing announcement that the NWO was back. Whether he's the leader or not, he's sure acting like he is. And then there's Hall, who supposedly has an injured knee. Not the best idea to push all the way to the top a guy who is injured, and barely in any condition to work if he were healthy. He and Nash are two guys who should be phased out, but instead they have all the titles, and are once again back on top. Hart, I see better things for him, as he comes out of this with a hot feud with Goldberg in the making. No complaints there. I enjoy the comments from some regarding how WCW turned Jeff Jarrett into a star whereas the WWF couldn't. Well geez, it's not as if WCW has done anything with him here. They just imported him, unchanged, with his "Don't P*** Me Off" gimmick intact. The WCW fans popped for Jarrett because he was a WWF superstar jumping ship. Then push him to the moon and voila--there you are. They took a guy who was already over in the WWF, an Intercontinental Champion, and got him slightly more over in WCW. Not that I begrudge Jarrett anything. I liked him when I first saw him years ago. I hated his "Double J" WWF gimmick, but enjoyed a number of matches and angles he took part in. I was excited when he went to WCW, but he quickly went on a slide there, getting buried in an endless feud with Steve "Mongo" McMichael. Back to the WWF he went, and it was a rocky start, before he finally hit a stride with the gimmick he still has today. Jarrett was slowly rising in the WWF. Maybe he'd have reached the top, maybe not. He'd already won the IC belt, and perhaps wouldn't have lost it to Chyna had he not announced his pending exit from the company. For all we know, right now, he might have been locked in a feud with Chris Jericho, which wouldn't have been all that bad a thing. And with Steve Austin gone, and Mankind about to go, there's currently room for advancement to the top in the WWF. So, did WCW perform a miracle with him? Not really. Certainly part of Jarrett's push is to signal to other WWF midcarders that if they jump, and Russo is interested in you, you can get a decent push. But one can't take away from Jarrett his hard work of late, not being complacent and working hard to earn the spot he's ended up in. I can honestly say that, so long as there's a storyline there, Jarrett's one of the few guys in WCW right now I look forward to seeing. I wonder what the folks on the Internet are going to think of Benoit losing the U.S. belt so soon, and in a match so obviously inferior to the one in which he won it in? Benoit is the darling of the Internet. Jarrett, though, has converted a few new fans with his solid work as of late, especially at the PPV. Jarrett's win tonight was done so that every member of the new NWO would have a title belt around their waist. Otherwise it would have been a good idea to have spent a few weeks building to the rematch, giving Jarrett the belt then. Moving on from the NWO angle, you go into a massive freefall down to the rest of the promotion. As hot as the main event storyline this week, virtually everything else was terrible. Nothing seemed to click. Jarrett vs. Benoit was the only good match, and that was nothing special. So looking at the "New WCW", what exactly do we have. Obviously the "handcuffs" of Standards & Practices has been removed, allowing for some harsh language and edgier content, in an effort to give the promotion the illusion of "attitude". Bret Hart has turned heel, and the NWO is back. I credit WCW for injecting a real storyline, finally, into their main event tier, and for doing it in an interesting way this week. Not that this was a good show, mind you, but the finish was fairly hot. But what about next week? They can't do all this again, so whatever big rating they pop this week (and I think they're going to do well) can't be duplicated next week. Next week we're back to business as usual, with the only change from last week to next week being that Hart turned heel. They should be able to build to a hot main event at the next PPV. The rest of the company, though ... ? Some may say I'm looking ahead too quickly, and that I should just bask in the moment. What moment?! Hart turned heel, and somebody spraypainted "NWO". It's not as if we haven't been down this road before, many times. The only real change that will begin next week is that the top heels in the company will have matching t-shirts. That's it. And is no one else depressed that WCW has now opened the door for Hulk Hogan to make his "triumphant" return? Had it been Bischoff or Nash doing this angle a lot more people would have seen it for the desperation move it really is. I'm still looking for that sign from Russo that he can do anything with WCW. What's going to bring the company back from the brink? Russo had his big shot this week and all he could do was turn up the raunch a bit and bring back some old angles. Russo still hasn't shown any of the creativity he's supposedly famous for. I dunno ... I didn't hate the show this week, but didn't care much for it either. They tried, and I give them credit for that, but I'm still not sold that this company has any ideas. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF RAW is WAR: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Two Hours+. Location: Houston, Texas. WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross and Michael Hayes. - Triple H and Stephanie Helmsley are backstage, dressed in Christmas regalia, in a room decorated in the same manner. No Vince or Shane McMahon in the building means they will once again be booking the show. - TEST vs. THE NEW AGE OUTLAWS Stephanie really has it in for Test now that she's broken her ties with him. Last Thursday she DQ'ed him for using a closed fist, and the Outlaws re-broke Test's nose. This week he has to face them in a handicap match while wearing a plastic protective mask. Test fights the good fight, but quickly falls victim to a FameAsser from Billy Gunn. The Mean Street Posse, still trying to suck up to the Helmsleys, bring in Edge, Christian & the Hardy Boyz. Triple H splits the two brother teams up and orders Edge & Matt to take on Christian & Jeff in a tag match. Last Thursday all four brothers had to face each other in (really good) singles matches. The winners are paired here, as are the losers. - Kurt Angle is informed he has to face Viscera tonight. - EDGE/MATT HARDY vs. CHRISTIAN/JEFF JARDY Terri Runnels comes out with both teams and pouts. The crowd seems to be in a coma, which is disappointing given how good this match is. Matt Hardy gets a bloody nose from either a Tomikaze from Christian, or a 450 Splash from Jeff, who scores the pin. Chalk one up to the brothers who lost last week. Moolah and Mae Young are brought into the Helmsley Inner Sanctum. Triple H plays bait-and-switch, first offering Mae a bottle of booze, then informing her that she and Moolah have to wrestle against the Acolytes and the Dudley Boyz! - Triple H & Stephanie come out to give Jim Ross a present. Last Thursday Ross said Stephanie was acting like a "rhymes with 'witch' and starts with a 'B'" ... so Stephanie slapped the taste out of his mouth. Quickly they bring up Vince McMahon and the Rock being listed at #5 in the "Entertainment Weekly" list of the top entertainers of 1999. Triple H says with Vince gone, it should be them in the magazine, so he offers up photos of himself and Stephanie, which are placed on the two small screens which are adjacent to either side of the Titan-Tron. (For the rest of the show it looks like Elaine from "Seinfeld" and Han Solo are looking down on the fans.) Then, as Stephanie is offering an apology for slapping J.R. last week, Triple H crawls behind him. A push from Stephanie and over he goes. Triple H then grabs onto an arm and prepares to break it (which he did once before, you may remember, a few months back). Car crash--here comes Mankind! Long story short, Triple H books Mankind against a mystery opponent in a "Boiler Room Brawl" later tonight. Stephanie then seals the deal with a slap. - KURT ANGLE vs. VISCERA Angle's The Man, running circles around Viscera and keeping him off balance with drop-kicks. Stephanie, who seems a bit too interested in Angle, keeps an eye on the match. Steve Blackman comes out and nails Viscera with a kendo stick. Angle's finisher only gets Viscera about three feet off the mat, but it's enough to get the pin. Triple H isn't too pleased with these developments, but Stephanie plays innocent. There's Mae Young & Moolah. There's the Dudley Boyz. There's the Acolytes. - MOOLAH/MAE YOUNG vs. THE DUDLEY BOYZ vs. THE ACOLYTES The Dudleyz actually pound on Moolah and Mae, which seems so mean. From there the Acolytes run in. Buh Buhb Ray is held, and the ladies deliver blows, none of which Buh Buh feels obligated to sell. Moolah is dumped to the floor. I'm not sure where Faarooq. Mae winds up doubleteamed, receiving a headbutt between the legs, then getting pinned by D-Von. Mark Henry, who has been watching in the back, runs in to save Mae. That was ... disturbing. Triple H laughs, the Posse laughs, Triple H tells them not to laugh. The subject of Mankind's opponent is brought up. Stephanie unwraps a present: a Santa Claus doll. Triple H says that's who Mankind's opponent will be. Boo Bradley? - Mankind sure isn't happy to have to wrestle Jolly Old St. Nick, Mankind tells Michael Cole. The Posse attack, sending him into the boiler room. Inside awaits Santa Claus, who I think we've seen before (though darned if I can remember when). Mankind says he can't fight him, and adds "don't worry, I'll put ya over!" Suddenly he's attacked by three guys also dressed as Santa. Mankind makes quick work of them (they all look like local indy wrestlers). He starts to make his way out of the boiler room, but comes across two more Santa's, who are this time obviously the New Age Outlaws. They do a bit more damage, but Mankind is still able to dispatch them with the various implements of destruction laying nearby. Mankind grabs a pane of glass, and prepares to play "Sugar Plum Fairy" on Road Dogg's head, when suddenly another Santa appears and smacks the glass in Mankind's face with a toy bag. This one is Triple H. "I heard him exclaim as he rose out of sight, 'I've got two words for all ... suck it!'" He exits the boiler room and the ref, without a trace of humor whatsoever, announces "the winner: Santa Claus." - Triple H is stripping off his Santa pants as Al Snow enters. He demands a "Brahma Bullrope Match" with the Rock. Triple H tells him he isn't in a position to demand anything, but grants him the match anyway. I've forgotten to mention ... Jerry "The King" Lawler is absent because he's off attending the Hollywood premiere of "Man in the Moon", the Andy Kaufman movie which both Lawler and Jim Ross have parts in. WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Michael Hayes. - CHRIS JERICHO vs. THE GODFATHER (w/ Ho's) Same story as last week: Chyna comes out and low blows the Godfather, allowing Jericho to score the pin. I *guess* Chyna's in love with Jericho, and wants to help him win. I can't figure out what else this angle could mean. Triple H doesn't know what Chyna's up to either. Moving on, he tells Terri and B.B. Bush that they have to take part in the first ever "Topless Top-rope Match". Val Venis will face Hardcore Holly. Each woman will represent one of the wrestlers. Each time one man throws his opponent over the top rope, his woman has to remove an item of clothing. The first one topless loses. Stephanie isn't too thrilled with this match, and takes her anger out on the Posse. - VAL VENIS vs. HARDCORE HOLLY (w/ Crash Holly) The two women stand on the stage. Triple H comes out to direct traffic. Almost immediately both men go out over the top rope. Both women have to remove their dresses, revealing bra & panties. Poor Lawler. A minute later Venis is again sent over the top, Holly sliding to the floor to pull Val off the ropes and secure the win. I don't think triple H said who was with who, but Terri is excused and B.B. is ordered to remove her top, lest she lose her job. She mulls it over and begins to unhitch her mammoth brassiere. Triple H then steps in front of her, shielding her from the view fans with his jacket, making exclamations of wonder over the size of her Christmas ornaments. Major heel heat from the crowd. Holly, for "winning" the match gets a shot at Jericho's IC belt this Thursday. Clips from SmackDown! There's the Rock. - THE ROCK vs. AL SNOW This isn't the main event? Not the greatest action here: mostly punches and kicks. You know why you have to be careful when mic-ing the crowd for noise? Because sometimes you can pick up the calls in the ring, as happens here when the ref tells the two they have four minutes left. Oops! Three minutes later the New Age Outlaws run in. The ref, having been taken out by the bullrope a few minutes earlier, comes to in time to count the pin for Snow. Yeah, that was just about four minutes. A member of the Posse accidentally spills a flower vase full of water on Triple H. Triple H smiles, and says as a Christmas present he'll let the three of them wrestle--no, not the Acolytes--Too Cool. - Tori is sick of what the Helmsleys are doing to Kane. Well, things will be no better this week, as Kane goes up against WWF Champ the Big Show. If Kane loses, Tori has to spend the holidays with X-Pac. - THE MEAN STREET POSSE vs. TOO COOL/RIKISHI PHATU The Posse protest to no avail. Screwed by Triple H again. The Posse suck too much to be in a match that lasts this long (over five minutes). Splat ... pin ... dance. One last look at the Helmsleys. - THE BIG SHOW vs. KANE (w/ Tori) Oops--spoke too soon. Here they come to watch the match, seated in a La-Z-Boy on the stage. An early DQ win for Kane is overturned when Triple H orders the match to continue, no DQ. A minute or so later the two are counted out on the floor. Uh-uh, says Stephanie, no countout. "They're just making this up as they go along!" declares Ross. Well, duh! The match continues, turning out ten times better than the matches these two have had on PPV this year. Kane's really busting his ass, and actually has the match won, when out come the Outlaws to harass Tori. Distracted, the Big Show recovers and powerbombs Kane through the announce table. Cover and pin. The Outlaws carry Tori up the ramp. Triple H wishes everyone a "very RAW Christmas", and that's the end. - This Thursday: Hardcore Holly vs. Chris Jericho. - Next week: Nothing announced. Comments: A disappointing show. Good for what it was, but seriously lacking any real punch. The first hour was good, and the second started well enough. Then the Rock and Snow stunk up the joint in their less-than-spectacular match. Things then got worse with the poorly placed Posse/Too Cool match. The main event, although it was decent enough, wasn't even announced until just before it started. Actually it was a good show overall, it just didn't match up to the big build going on over on Nitro. It was too much like last week's SmackDown! I have a feeling Vince McMahon was maybe supposed to return, but they eventually decided to hold it off, figuring it might be wasted going up against Russo's big angle. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Bottom Line: The ratings are in and WCW has to have mixed feelings. Yeah, they did go up a few tenths-of-a-point, which was to be expected because this was a post-PPV show, but their highest rated head-to-head quarter hour was the first one. RAW's rating dipped a few tenths from last week--the drop almost solely attributable to a really weak opening quarter hour rating. With "Monday Night Football" doing a hefty rating this week, both shows actually did quite well. Nitro's gains would have probably been more significant were it not for that (though by that same token RAW may not have seen any ratings drop at all). The overrun for Nitro, which went really long this week, drew higher ratings than anything they did head-to-head--though not at the cost of RAW, as their overrun went up too. All in all it was a night of improved ratings for Nitro, but one which saw their foes--the WWF--only take a very minor hit in the ratings themselves. (By comparison Nitro scored bigger ratings the night following the Mayhem PPV, while RAW had a lower rating than they had this week.) Since Russo has taken over in WCW he's had four shows that drew higher ratings than this show, while the WWF has had four shows that did lower ratings than this week--all occurring the same weeks. In other words, this was only WCW's 5th best ratings performance versus RAW in the ten weeks since Russo took over. All this for the show Russo himself says the company has been building up to for the last two months. You can find the numbers at the usual wrestling news sites. Of course the real question is can this "momentum" be carried into next week. I put "momentum" in quotes because there really isn't any momentum yet to speak of. They did go up from last week, just as the ratings went up when Russo first took over, but in both instances you're comparing the improved ratings to shows that were at an all-time low. The ratings this week are right in the mid-range of a erratic ten week span which has seen WCW ratings go on a slow downward slide. If the ratings go up next week then they should be in okay shape. If they go down, though, they're in serious trouble. WCW has does have an ace in the hole, however. In two weeks they shorten to two hours. When that happens, the ratings will take a healthy jump. No matter how bad their head-to-head hour is, their strong first hour will give them an overall rating noticeably higher than what it is now. One strong show and WCW could see their ratings jump up into the 4.0 range, which would be a great improvement, but also a somewhat misleading one due to the format change. The ratings war as we know it will greatly change in two weeks. WCW will be able to post better numbers, but so will the WWF. "Monday Night Football" only has two weeks to go in the season. With them done for the year, and the WWF having their second hour all to themselves in the heart of primetime, the WWF's numbers should see an artificial inflation as well. The only battle anyone is going to pay attention to any more is the one head-to-head hour. WCW can conceivably be very competitive in the quarter hour segments, and those will undoubtedly be what everyone is watching from now on. If the WWF goes soft in their first hour they could see a weak quarter hour get killed by Nitro, which will usually be building to their main events at that time. Nitro's chances of beating RAW outright are slim to none, but the real battle, as many fans will see it, will be who won how many of those head-to-head quarters. That's not to say WCW doesn't have their work cut out for them. If they stay at the same level of quality they are at now, higher numbers or not, they aren't going to be very competitive head-to-head--especially if the WWF doesn't let up. Don't be fooled in two or three weeks when the WCW faithful trumpet their ratings "resurgence". Look closely at the numbers, imagine what that would have been spread out over three hours, then decide whether it's an improvement or not. We'll know soon enough, in the first few weeks that follow that, how well Nitro is doing (because the first two hour show will set the standard by which to judge their new ratings). Just this week if you dropped the third hour for Nitro their ratings would jump by something like two-tenths of a point--and of course their second hour would probably have been higher rated because it would have been a tighter, faster show building to their main event that hour. It seems like such a simple thing to do to help ratings, and WCW has known it for ages, but couldn't get TNT to give up that good third hour ratings Nitro delivered for them. They've finally convinced the network that changes were needed to make the show a monster ratings hit again. The same will be true for Thunder, which moves to Wednesday nights in a few weeks. No competition from SmackDown! will mean higher ratings, no matter the quality of the show. As with Nitro it will take a few weeks to see how that show is progressing. Fate has interceded on Vince Russo's behalf, essentially giving him a fresh start in the coming weeks. His new NWO experiment couldn't have come at a better time. If he anticipated this, and had the timing worked into his plans, then maybe there's some promise in him yet. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1999 by John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those of "USLink". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week. Volume One, Number 214 of the "Monday Night Recap", December 20th, 1999.