Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #201 September 20th, 1999 The Opening Word: Apologies for this being so late, but a Sunday trip to a high school friend's place to watch the Vikings game turned into a rare three day vacation. I got home late Tuesday, and spent the next 30+ hours cranking this out in bits and pieces. What can I say about SmackDown!? Huge show last week, which turned out to be, according to Variety, the UPN network's highest rated Thursday night show EVER. It also beat all the other networks in the teenage viewers demographic. It's further reported that depending on what market the show plays in, it's drawing huge ratings. Some UPN stations ran that new syndicated show, "Battledome", after SmackDown! and pulled in big numbers as well. Speaking of "Battledome", if you haven't seen it, imagine "American Gladiators" with worked pro-wrestling style characters and storylines added. The "Battledome" warriors (or whatever they're called) have gimmicks, managers, valets, do interviews, and even compete for a championship belt! They go up against normal, average guys in bizarre "Mad Max" type events. The events themselves seem to be real, but between them we get angles straight out of pro-wrestling. In one clip, the Battledome Champion, Commando (or something ,like that), was walking down a hallway, when the lights went out. He was attacked, and when the lights came back on, his championship belt had been stolen. Later a sexy female spokesperson for "The Chairman" came out to reveal that he was the one who stole Commando's belt. The show's interesting to watch, if for no other reason than to try and spot the wrestling angles they've "borrowed". Back to wrestling ... I never thought so many people would get bent out of shape over Vince McMahon's winning the WWF Championship. It's like they figure Vince booked himself to win the title for shits and giggles, his company, his wrestlers, and the fans be damned. I'm not even sure where to begin explaining why this train of thought is wrong, but let me just lay out a few of the reasons Vince ended up with the WWF Championship last Thursday. First off, ever since Triple H put Steve Austin out of action at WrestleMania with his chair attack to the knee, Austin eventually returning the favor was a given. Causing Triple H to lose the title to the lowly Vince McMahon was the ultimate humiliation. One has to keep in mind here that the two key figures in this feud are Triple H and Steve Austin, not Vince McMahon. Austin could have helped anyone beat Triple H. Having it be McMahon, though, was not only a crushing insult to Triple H, but was also the height of irony, given the history between Austin and McMahon. This also fits into the WWF scheme of things as McMahon, like him or not, has been accepted by WWF fans as a "sports entertainer", and is an acknowledged impact player when it comes to drawing ratings, PPV buyrates, etc. More than a few fans were anxious to see him return. Since McMahon's heel character had run its course (for the time being), it was time to build him up as a babyface. The higher up the card he is, the more weight that could be thrown behind that effort. Right now there's nothing higher than interjecting him into a title feud between Austin and Triple H. Vince gets the big rub from "Stone Cold" by Austin helping him score a fluke win over Triple H. The only question in all this is will Triple H lose any of his heat? I think the answer to that is an emphatic "no", though it depends on what the outcome of the Unforgiven PPV will be. If Triple H comes away from the PPV with the belt, then he will be as hot as he ever was. If not, then one has to look upon Triple H's reign as champ as an experiment that the WWF apparently felt was a failure. What I found real interesting was the way some said they felt Triple H lost all his credibility with the loss to McMahon. Funny how some of these people were the same ones who have been saying all along that Triple H had no business holding the title because he didn't have any credibility to begin with! Regardless of all that, Steve Austin screwing over Triple H the way he did easily assures that their eventual rematch will be the next "big" match in the wrestling business. Maybe not WrestleMania big, but big nonetheless. And whether one likes it, or doesn't like it, Steve Austin will almost assuredly come out ahead in that one. Any other speculation on Triple H's fate would have to wait until after this week's RAW. I'm sure going into this week hoping WCW doesn't come away with the wrong impression over how well last week's Thunder did. Give away three or four PPV main event matches for free and your ratings are bound to go up. My fear however was that WCW would take it to mean that all they have to do to turn the company around is feature MORE Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Sting, Kevin Nash, Sid, Goldberg and Rick Steiner on Monday nights! Yeah ... who needs those pesky mid-carders anyway?! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WCW Monday Nitro: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Three Hours+. Location: Cincinnati, Ohio. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - "Last Week" video package. This is followed by the Sting "Has He Been Evil All Along?" video. - JUVENTUD GUERRERA/PSYCHOSIS vs. KIDMAN/REY MYSTERIO, JR. An unusual foray into Cruiserweight storytelling here, as Psychosis scores the upset pin on Kidman in a relatively short match. Eddie Guerrero and Konnan come out to beat on Juvi and Psychosis. Chavo Guerrero comes to their assistance. A house mic is introduced into the mix and we get a challenge thrown out (by Chavo, supposedly on Psychosis' behalf) for a "Mask vs. Hair Match" against Kidman next week on Nitro. Given that Psychosis recently lost his mask in Mexico, I think that makes the outcome here easy to guess. Still, can't fault WCW for actually setting up a match for NEXT WEEK on THIS WEEK'S show. Video opener gives the suggestion that everything that's happened thus far doesn't count. Is it that hard to get this 30 second clip out of the way at the BEGINNING of the show? I can't see "Monday Night Football" cutting away from the game just to show Hank Williams, Jr. warbling about this week's match-up. - Sid/Goldberg interview clips from last week. - GOLDBERG vs. BRIAN KNOBBS (w/ Jimmy Hart) Squash. Spear. Jackhammer. Pin. It's funny to read people on the Net only just picking up the fact that Goldberg has his old music back, even though he's had it for over a month now! Hell, it took most of them a few weeks to figure out that Goldberg's new song was "Crush 'Em" by Megadeth, and by the time they figured that out, Goldberg had already switched back. Anyway, Goldberg is so over with the crowd here it isn't funny. - Revolution video. - Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko footage from last week. - "Mean" Gene Okerlund is on hand to interview Ric Flair. Flair says he wants a piece of Sting. Chris Benoit then comes out and says he gets Sting first, as per his winning a shot at the title ... sometime or other. It's hard to follow this stuff when WCW says they're going to do one thing, then does another, then tries to do the thing they originally promised to do a week or two later. - After a video promo for the "Nitro Girl Search, "Mean" Gene brings out Kimberly and Tygress. Last week's Nitro winner was Ashley, which doesn't surprise anyone. This week's contestants are named Keisha and Robbie. Keisha is okay, but Robbie already has Nitro Girl written all over her. I'm just barely interested enough in all this (not really, though) to note that Rikki Rachtman is nowhere to be seen. HOUR TWO Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - STING vs. CHRIS BENOIT Schiavone breathlessly hypes next week's show, which will feature a main event with Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair and Bret Hart versus Sting, Lex Luger and Diamond Dallas Page. Not much to say here. Decent match, lasting over fifteen minutes by my clock, but the end comes when Lex Luger takes advantage of a ref bump to come in and knock out Benoit with a baseball bat. Sting covers for the pin. Take note that Sting not only kicked out of a pin cover following Benoit's top turnbuckle headbutt, but he also escaped from the Crippler Crossface by reaching the ropes. Ric Flair, Diamond Dallas Page and Hulk Hogan all run in to establish the pecking order. Does Hogan sleep in that yellow & red outfit of his too? What is it with he and Sting never appearing in street clothes? Sting used to be a normal guy several years ago. Now he's just a cartoon character like Hogan, who never comes out without his superhero outfit (whether it be the colorful "Hulkamania" look, or his evil "Hollywood" togs). - Berlyn promo. - BERLYN (w/ Bodyguard) vs. SCOTT ARMSTRONG Oh good God! Scott is the Armstrong who looks the most like his dad "Bullet" Bob, meaning he looks queer in that 50's golden curly-haired sort of way. This match flat-out sucked, with the two trading a few wrestling holds to start, then Berlyn dominating for the next several minutes. Almost total squash, yet Berlyn still needs his bodyguard to help him get the win. Is that supposed to get him heat? Only in the "annoying heel" way, kind of like Chris Jericho in the WWF, except that Berlyn--unlike Jericho--isn't the least bit amusing. Brad Armstrong, now freed from the ranks of the No Limit Soldiers, comes in to stand over his beaten brother. Great, a Berlyn/Brad Armstrong feud. I'll bet dollars-to-deutchmarks that WCW sees a big ratings drop during this match. Flair vs. DDP later tonight. In a clip taped earlier we see the Insane Clown Posse tour bus pull up. I wonder if WCW popped for the custom paint job, or ICP's record label? Violent J and El Vampiro offer words of advice to Shaggy 2 Dope, who gets a shot at the Cruiserweight Title tonight. Am I the only one who thinks Shaggy looks like a fifteen year old kid? - Plug for the WCW Hotline. I wish I could get paid to tell half-truths about the WWF like Mark Madden does. By the way, you know where's the best place to go to get WWF news? WCW Live. WCW might not be in the shape they're in if they didn't spend a good 30-40% of their time talking about the competition. The same could probably be said for ECW. - "Mean" Gene. DDP. Typical "TWO TIMES, TWO TIMES, TWO TIMES" interview. Why does he say "TWO TIMES" three times? - Eddie Guerrero/Saturn clip from last week. - EVAN KARAGIAS vs. BLITZKRIEG Where's Sid? ... there he is. Karagias sneaks in the pin just before Sid comes in, powerbombs the two, and runs his record up to 86-0. Sid does his thing on the mic. The ugly thing here is that there's FIVE MORE WEEKS OF THIS until he and Goldberg meet at Halloween Havoc. I'll admit that WCW's dwindling, loyal fanbase seems to be buying this story, and it's sure to bump up the buyrate some, but will the actual match be any good? Nope. Sid stinks, and Goldberg isn't exactly the one to carry him to anything worth watching. I predict a fifteen minute rear chinlock by Sid before Goldberg hits the Spear/Jackhammer combo for the win. - Revolution promo. You know, the Revolution would probably be better served if they could actually WIN A MATCH instead of getting all these promos. HOUR THREE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - SATURN (w/ the Revolution) vs. EDDIE GUERRERO (w/ the Filthy Animals) Didn't we see this match last week? Probably shouldn't complain. An okay match, which Saturn wins when Douglas sneaks in and knocks out Eddie with a loaded fist. Saturn doesn't look happy, but takes the win. - "Mean" Gene. Hulk Hogan. "Well you know, 'Mean' Gene ... " - ICP music video clip, which seems to glorify murder and vandalism. - SHAGGY 2 DOPE (w/ Vampiro & Violent J) vs. LENNY (w/ Lodi) Lodi is attacked by his homosexual/homophobic fan again. What is the point of this? A quick series of drop-kicks, bodyslams and powerbombs leads to Lenny scoring a roll-up pin, with a little help from Lodi. - "Mean" Gene. Rick Steiner. Scott Steiner!?! "Big Poppa Pump" returns from wherever he's been. Can't say as I've missed him. Steiner lets loose with his usual filthy, innuendo-laced interview. He beats on the corpse of the NWO a bit by accusing Hulk Hogan of not being "4 Life", and challenges him to ... something. - KANYON vs. BOOKER T. (w/ Stevie Ray) This is one of those matches you'd expect to go ten minutes or so, but with so little time left in the show, it couldn't go possibly near that long. Booker gets the quick win with the missile drop-kick. Hard not to feel that they just threw this match out there because they needed to kill some time before the main event. - RIC FLAIR vs. DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE Things start off hot with Flair jumping DDP in the aisle. The two battle in the crowd, which always turns up the excitement level a notch. Things then slow down into a standard match, which goes finish-less when Sting and Lex Luger run in and whack Flair with the (rubber--did I just see it bend?) baseball bat. Hulk Hogan comes in for the save, but is taken down by a shot to the knee. Flair crawls over and covers Hogan's battered knee. - This Thursday: Evan Karagias vs. Lenny. - Next week: Psychosis vs. Kidman in a "Hair vs. Mask Match". Hogan, Flair & Hart vs. Sting, Luger & DDP. Comments: I guess Flair's forgiven Hogan for that time he and the NWO drove him out into that field and beat the living piss out of him, leaving him for dead as seventeen cameramen looked on. Dull-dull-dullsville, man. WCW is rebuilding the house from scratch, and oh how boring it as. Maybe that's not too bad a thing. I can't think of a single moment of this show which made it worth going out of my way to catch. Some okay wrestling in a few of the matches, but again nothing that couldn't have been missed by the average fan. Where's the excitement? Where's the drama? Where's the fun? Next week's highlight package is going to look glaringly generic. Those inclined to like this show could, at best, call it "solid". A show like this will satisfy those fans who already like WCW (and if this week's ratings are any indicator, that number is still shrinking steadily). It's not too likely, though, to win over any WWF fans, those WCW fans they've lost, or bring in any new fans. And I don't see that changing any time soon. I'm sure WCW thought that turning Sting heel would have been the spark they needed to claim they had The Hot Angle in wrestling. The fans haven't agreed. Sting's still too popular, and doesn't look too inclined to do anything other than sneak attack Hogan and Flair: guys any number of fans don't mind seeing take some lumps (especially Hogan). Sting could eventually build up some heat by going after Goldberg, but that's obviously a month or more down the road (at the earliest). I'm sure they see Berlyn as another experiment which is supposed to grab our attention and hold it. Given the negative buzz surrounding the character before its debut, you'd think that WCW would have gone way over the top to counteract that. Instead they played it low key, and made him look like a total fool in his first match. The damage was already done by the time he beat Buff Bagwell on Nitro (speaking of whom, where was HE this week?) I'm betting WCW thinks they have a huge ace up their sleeve with the eventual return of Scott Hall and Kevin Nash. It's hard to watch WCW right now. They still have their problems, but we know they're trying to sort them out. I think the best we fans can do is point out those positives we do see, and hope somehow word gets back to WCW. For my money the biggest positive I saw this week was their efforts to hype Thunder and next week's Nitro. Giving the fans any reason to watch their upcoming shows is generally a good thing. I think a show like this is the bare minimum that the company needs to keep doing. Establish a baseline for the show, giving the fans a good idea of what they can expect each week. Then start rolling with some major storylines. THEN the company will be interesting again. For now, though, the company can say that they don't suck as much as they used to. It may not sound flattering, but in my book, that's a compliment. Getting caught up with another friend of mine on Tuesday who I hadn't seen in ages (hi Sam), he admitted that he was watching a lot of wrestling lately, but that he couldn't watch much WCW because it was too boring. When RAW starts, he changes the channel. It's interesting to bump into people in the "real world" and see their opinion bear out what the TV ratings have been telling us on the Internet. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF RAW is WAR: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Two Hours+. Location: Houston, Texas. WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. - Clip package shows us the tragic mistake Triple H made in badmouthing Vince McMahon's "sexually frustrated old lady". Tempers flared, fists were thrown, somebody let the Rattlesnake in, and a bloody Vince McMahon escaped with his life, and the WWF Championship belt. - There's "No Chance in Hell" that this show wouldn't start with new WWF Champ Vinnie Mac, modestly swaggering to the ring with his new belt wrapped snugly 'round his waist. McMahon acknowledges the cheers of the fans, but says that because he's a man of his word, he cannot involve himself in WWF business by keeping the WWF Title. He's decided that it's best for all if he vacate the title, pull himself from Sunday's "Six Pack Match", and put the belt up for grabs for the WWF's top ranked contenders. ***KEE-RASH!*** "Even though I still hate your guts, and hell--you might even hate mine--I will say this ... this place just ain't the same without ya, ya silly bastard!" It seems McMahon owes "Stone Cold" a favor, and he can repay that favor by plugging Austin into that now-empty slot in the "Six Pack Match". Vince demurs, saying that would constitute involving himself in "WWF business"--something he's contractually prevented from doing. ... and here comes Triple H, Chyna, and their police escort. The former champs says he deserves the spot in that match. The crowd chants "ass-hole!", which both McMahon and Austin point out. Triple H says either he gets in the match, or a member of McMahon's family goes out on a stretcher tonight. There's "No Chance in Hell" the McMahon family will take that lying down. Shane McMahon is out to order Triple H and Chyna into a match against himself ... and Vince? Vince certainly looks surprised at that one. All of this doesn't seem to sit well with Austin, and he asks McMahon when he's going to get the balls to take his company back. Vince says he can't--the Undertaker's loss to Austin at "Fully Loaded" put Vince on the sidelines for good. But Austin produces a trump card (and quite conveniently engages in a bit of storyline reverse engineering) by saying the contract stipulated that one person could formally release McMahon from that obligation: Steve Austin himself. Austin offers to excuse McMahon from his contract-enforced retirement, if Vince will give him a title shot. Vince agrees, but he won't put Austin into the "Six Pack" match, he'll instead give Austin a shot at the title AFTER Unforgiven. Triple H will get the "Six Pack" shot instead, and Austin will get to be the guest referee. (Don't forget: the WWF referees are still on strike.) Austin's happy, Triple H is fuming, Vince McMahon is back in charge, and all is once again right with the world ... ... until Vince turns evil again. But that's what we all really want, isn't it? Personally, I'd have booked the show tonight so that Vince said he was going to vacate the belt, only to have Commissioner Shawn Michaels come out and force him to defend it against his good buddy Triple H. The Rock has arrived. Met by a tiny lady security guard, who is celebrating her birthday, the Rock tries--but fails--to do his usual catchphrases on her. He instead gives her $100 and sings her a few lines of "Smackdown Hotel". The best part of this is you can hear the live crowd doing his lines for him as he sets them up, but decides not to do them himself out of respect for her. Great stuff. Mankind is in the boiler room. The Undertaker is outside, addressing his Ministry of Darkness. Midian (with new tights--I can't believe that was considered a "major rumor" over the weekend!) is dispatched to deal with him. He fails. Viscera is next, and Mankind succumbs to the two-on-one beating. Emerging from the boiler room, the Big Show joins in on the attack. My friend Mark, watching this, noted that "if big guys were really fighting like that, there'd be fatalities." Hah! - "During the break" footage shows the Rock coming to Mankind's rescue. - The referees are still on strike, and picketed the arena earlier in the day. - CHRIS JERICHO (w/ Curtis Hughes) vs. "BADD ASS" BILLY GUNN Wow, an actual match tonight? Gunn is starting to remind me of Lex Luger, though thankfully his workrate is a few notches higher than that. "Dr." Tom Pritchard is the scab referee. A decent little match, with Jericho going over with some help from Hughes. As Jericho ties up the ref, Hughes DDT's Gunn on the floor. Y2J then slaps on the "Walls of Jericho" for the win. Michael Cole is in the back with Mankind. Along comes the Rock, and he says if the Undertaker is worried about th rock talking trash, he should hear him do it in his sleep ("*mumble* roodypoocandyass ... layeththesmackdown ... *zzzzz*"). Mankind adds that things between he and the Rock are "platonic". I thought it was "plutonic"? - Cole now has the Undertaker and Big Show. Undertaker tells the Rock to hire some new comedy writers. "Dark Side Rules Match" tonight for the Tag Titles. - WWF Women's Champ Ivory hits the ring. She makes fun of Houston's big rats, cockroaches, and her upcoming PPV challenger, that "skank" Luna. For fun she calls in some woman from the crowd to humiliate. Turns out to be Lune in disguise. IVORY vs. LUNA Luna destroys Ivory, and covers for the non-title pin in under a minute. The ref, by the way, is former "Brooklyn Brawler" Steve Lombardi. Cole gets a word with D-Lo Brown. Mark Henry is quickly on the scene for the attack. Shane and Vince are preparing for their match. Vince, still selling Triple H's attack from last week, says he isn't a hundred percent. - Our weekly outdoor look at the arena leads to a shot of D-Lo Brown climbing into his car, intent on tracking down Mark Henry. - Terry Taylor's on hand to get comments from Test and Stephanie McMahon. Test would like a shot at Jeff Jarrett tonight. Here comes Jarrett, with Debra and Miss Kitty in tow. Jarrett instead proposes a mixed-tag match between himself & Debra, and Test and Steph. Stephanie quickly accepts. Neither Test nor debra look to happy about it. - THE DUDLEY BOYZ vs. THE NEW BROOD (w/ Gangrel) D-Von does his "Three Commandments" promo. The Acolytes come out for color commentary. Harvey Whippelman is the referee. Stevie Richards, for some reason, is at ringside dressed like the Dudleyz. The match itself is a quickie, with the Dudley Death Drop ("3D") leading to the pin. In come the Acolytes and they take out both the Dudleyz and Richards. Jarrett is ready to go, but Debra's having a chat with the makeup lady, so Jarrett takes her down into the Figure Four (the makeup lady that is). - Recap of Jarrett's quest to make women respect him. - JEFF JARRETT/DEBRA (w/ Miss Kitty) vs. TEST/STEPHANIE MCMAHON Debra refuses to tag in when Jarrett's in trouble. Test lands the elbowdrop of the top, tags in Stephanie, and she covers for the pin. The McMahon family is a DYNASTY! Jarrett clears the cobwebs and, blaming his loss on Debra, slaps the Figure Four on her! Heel perfection is achieved, as the entire crowd chants "ass-hole!" There's Chyna and Triple H ... ... and the Rock and Mankind ... ... and the Big Show ... ... and the Undertaker talking ... to Kane?! I think my brain just melted. WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. - THE ROCK/MANKIND vs. THE UNDERTAKER/THE BIG SHOW This match is under "Dark Side Rules", which seems to be no holds barred--the bad guys can do whatever they want. Midian and Viscera come out and replace the Undertaker, who does color commentary again. (The Undertaker is still suffering from that groin pull, explaining his relative inactivity of late.) The numbers favor the side of evil, until the lights dim and out comes Kane. The previous shot of him with the Undertaker suggested a reunion between the two, which is what the Undertaker expects here, but Kane pulls a fast one by nailing the Big Show with a clothesline off the top. Mandible Claw on Midian. Rock Bottom. People's Elbow. Pin. The Rock and Mankind regain the Tag Team Titles. Methinks the Man From the Darkside will make the guy in the big red diaper pay for this. Terry Taylor is backstage with Marianna, who has a big bruise on her cheek. She makes it clear that Chaz is abusing her. Chaz happens along, and again I'm not sure if Chaz is trying to find out what happened, or if he's just downplaying the abuse as no big deal. Along come a couple of Triple H's police escort, and they haul Chaz off to the pokey. I say lock up whoever thought of this angle too. The Undertaker issues orders to his minions to find Kane and rip out his heart. I say do the same to whoever thought up the previous angle. - STEVE BLACKMAN vs. SEAN STASIAK Stasiak is filling in for the now incarcerated Chaz. Val Venis comes out carrying Blackman's bag of martial arts weapons. The match goes by the numbers (and it's really too late in the show to be putting on a match like this), until, Blackman grabs his bag and tries to use the weapons therein. Turns out Venis has replaced them with, shall we say, various implements of sexual gratification. Roll-up and pin by the rookie Stasiak. There's the Undertaker ... ... and Shane & Vince. Shane is practically bouncing off the walls: so much so that Vince has to tell him to settle down. - The Undertaker makes his way out. Once there, he calls out Kane. Here comes Kane. Here comes Viscera, Midian and the Big Show. They pour gasoline on Kane. They try to set him on fire, but are chased off by Mankind and the Rock, wielding baseball bats. - Footage shot earlier shows Al Snow saying a few words over the freshly-dug grave of his dog, Pepper. Hopefully one of those rottweilers Al has there won't dig him up later. GTV then kicks in with a still photo of the Big Bossman, sometime later, urinating on Pepper's grave. We've certainly seen people urinate on RAW before, so I'm guessing that if the USA Network vetoed video footage of the incident, it was because of where he was pissing, and not simply because he was doing it. And now here's the Bossman, out to badmouth Snow. Hardcore Holly comes out instead, followed by Crash Holly and that damned scale. Yadda yadda yadda, let's have a match. THE BIG BOSSMAN vs. HARDCORE HOLLY (w/ Crash Holly) Hardcore Rules in this one, which certainly come into play when Holly smashes the Bossman in the face with a glass pitcher. The Bossman spends the rest of the match bleeding from numerous cuts and scratches across his rapidly swelling face. Ouch! Cut to the Titan-Tron, where we see Al Snow in the back with his dogs, tearing up a dummy of the Bossman. The Bossman handcuffs Holly to the ropes, but Crash Holly massages the Bossman's skull with a large metal turnbuckle wrench. Holly gets the pin. Suddenly we're in a strip club, as USA switches over to Playboy TV. Video pixelation covers all the naughty bits, however. - The strip club again, and it's clear why we're there: Mark Henry is at center stage, enjoying the scenery. Did he bring the cameraman with him? D-Lo Brown appears (did the cameraman come with him?) and takes out Henry. Funny to hear the strippers in the background cheering on the fight. Triple H and Chyna are making their way backstage, when Jarrett comes flying in with a guitar. He misses Chyna, and the area quickly fills with replacement referees. Shane says he has some business to attend to, and leaves Vince all alone (*insert dramatic music here*). - Triple H and Chyna come out, with Helmsley telling us all about how he's The Game. Shane then comes out, but there's no sign of Vince. Cut backstage, where we see someone has parked a forklift against Vince's dressing room door. Shane should be totally screwed, but it looks like a suitable replacement offers himself up, in the form of Shane's future brother-in-law, Test. TRIPLE H/CHYNA vs. SHANE MCMAHON/TEST I'm starting to run out of steam here, so let me really fly through this one: Jeff Jarrett comes out and attacks Chyna. The two of them brawl away from the ring. Shane and Test have the upper hand on Triple H for a while, until Triple H knocks out the ref, then takes out the others with a steel chair. He backs up the ramp, stalling, filling, killing time, the show should be done now, until Vince finally comes out and levels Triple H with a Hulk Hogan patented feather-light chair shot. Vince stands over the fallen ex-champ and gives him an earful as the show ends. - This Thursday: Nothing announced. - Next week: Nothing announced. Comments: I'll be damned surprised if Shane isn't planning on a heel turn. Everything seems to be leading up to it. Can't rule out a massive swerve on Vince's part either. I enjoyed this week's show, but it sure is hard to write about when the WWF squeezes a hundred angles in on the night. Here's the final line-up for Unforgiven: * Triple H vs. Undertaker vs. Big Show vs. Kane vs. Mankind vs. the Rock. "Six Pack Match" for the WWF Championship. Steve Austin special guest referee. * Jeff Jarrett vs. Chyna. Intercontinental Title Match. * Al Snow vs. Big Bossman. Hardcore Title Match in a "Kennel From Hell Match". * Ivory vs. Luna. Women's Championship Match. * Mark Henry vs. D-Lo Brown. European Title Match. * Chris Jericho vs. Ken Shamrock. * The Dudley Boyz vs. the Acolytes. * New Brood vs. Edge, Christian & Stevie Richards. "Bloodbath Rules Match". * Steve Blackman vs. Val Venis. Look for an angle on SmackDown! which will set up the British Bulldog replacing the Undertaker in the main event. I think I've put my finger on why the Chaz/Marianna angle bugs me, whereas the stuff involving Jarrett doesn't. I don't think too many are bothered when he does it to someone like Chyna or Luna. They're wrestlers, and are in the combat zone by their own choice. When it comes to putting the Figure Four on the ring announcer, or makeup lady, there's something about the randomness of the attacks that makes it amusing (depending on one's personal tastes). It's easier to accept it as the cartoon violence that it's supposed to be. It would stop being funny, though, if they tried to take it seriously, and had Jarrett's victims bleed, or in some way show off the effects of his attack. Knocking out someone with a guitar is one thing. Showing them the following week in the hospital with a bandaged head wouldn't be funny at all. The whole thing is politically incorrect, but that's its intention from the start. Imagine how the whole tone would have been different if Jarrett, instead of putting Debra in the Figure Four, had instead slapped her, or punched her. What bothers me about this thing with Marianna, or the time Randy Savage smacked Gorgeous George, is that it takes place in the context of a personal, emotional relationship. There's a whole subtext attached to it involving the betrayal of a relationship, infliction of pain, and the deliberately intention to demean and humiliate the victim. WCW took it way too far by actually showing the act of abuse. With Chaz and Marianna, whatever is going on is only being implied, but not shown. That still doesn't excuse the fact that the angle is being used as entertainment. I guess it's one thing for a TV show or movie to do it, but do we need it in wrestling? On an absolute scale all violence against women is a bad thing. But are there varying degrees of it? I think there is, and somewhere in there, there's a line which shouldn't be crossed. The WWF skirts that line a lot, and with the Chaz/Marianna thing, I think they've crossed it. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Bottom Line: What's this deal with the Nitro Girls? I hear rumblings about a rift in the group, and rumors that WCW may fire all of them except Kimberly, which fits in way too nicely with the Nitro Girl Search they've been doing. This is like the second or third week straight the Nitro Girls themselves weren't on. If you ask me, I say dump them altogether. After all, it's not as if anyone can prove they've ever contributed a thing to the ratings, and they don't do PPV's and house shows (usually). Just how much money is WCW spending on them? Let's assume the average Nitro Girl salary is $50,000 a year. It's probably more than that, but let's just play with that number. Then take five Nitro Girls (and there's more than that, but let's just take that number for the math here). You're looking at something like a quarter million bucks a year, probably more, and that's just in base salary. Then you have training costs, equipment, costumes, trainers, etc. Hell, just imagine how much it costs to fly the Nitro Girls to a new city each week, as well as hotel rooms, rental cars, food allowances, and so on. All this for a group of women who, in the eyes of the average WRESTLING fan, don't do all that much to enhance the company. To their credit, they do provide something of a revenue stream in calendar sales, and that swimsuit PPV they did. Is that enough to justify keeping them? I personally don't think so. There's any number of ways WCW can employ attractive ladies who add to the wrestling product, not detract from it. The WWF realizes this, though their treatment of women has certainly been open to some scrutiny. WCW should be able to find some happy medium between the extreme presentation of women the WWF employs, and the banal, pointless purpose the Nitro Girls serve. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1999 by John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those of "USLink". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week. Volume One, Number 201 of the "Monday Night Recap", September 20th, 1999.