Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #144 August 17th, 1998 WCW Monday Nitro: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Three Hours. Location: Hartford, Connecticut. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Larry Zbyszko. - "Hollywood" Hogan, The Giant and Eric Bischoff come out immediately after "Babylon 5" ends. As they make their way to the ring, announcers Schiavone and Tenay heavily push the fact that Nitro is live and is the ONLY live wrestling show on TV tonight. Hogan says it's time to end all the crap and get his World Title back from Goldberg. To do this, though, he's going to have the Giant "do his dirty work". I'm not sure if this constitutes a challenge or if Hogan is just officially announcing a match WCW matchmakers had already signed. Schiavone, as you'd expect, earmarks it as one of the greatest matches ever on Nitro. The usual opener follows this. Schiavone says something about RAW being taped "weeks ago". I guess time flows differently in Tony's Universe. Six days isn't "weeks ago" by any stretch of the imagination. - "Mean" Gene Okerlund interviews J.J. Dillon, who announces that the Wargames match at this year's Fall Brawl will feature three teams of three men: one team each from WCW, the Wolfpac and the NWO. Hogan will be the "team captain" for the NWO, while Kevin Nash will head the Wolfpac, and Diamond Dallas Page will head the WCW team. Whoever wins the match will get a title shot against Goldberg at the following PPV, Halloween Havoc, in October. The rest of the team participants will be named in the coming weeks. Heading to the break they show a clip from Saturday Night featuring Dean Malenko talking about the Horsemen. - Nitro Girls. Nitro Party Video. - STEVE "MONGO" MCMICHAEL vs. SICK BOY For the longest time I gave McMichael his due for taking wrestling seriously and putting forth at least some effort to be good. All that has changed since his recent return from injury. Mongo has looked just plain awful, with tonight's match being no exception. Mongo's best offense is a shoulderblock and a Tombstone, which is enough for him to get the ugly win. Didn't this exact same match take place last week? Schiavone and Tenay again plugged the fact that they were live: going so far as to mention that their competitor's main event is only ten seconds long this week. Tenay lies by saying WCW always delivers their main events, and that they're longer than ten seconds. (I assume he was just generalizing, since the "main event" on RAW actually lasted about as long as the average Goldberg match.) - "Mean" Gene interviews Diamond Dallas Page. DDP says he's dug up someone to be on his WCW team for Wargames, going "out west" to dig up this person who is "1 and 0" against Hogan. Obviously this is the Warrior (though it also describes Jay Leno). DDP then starts to talk about Bret Hart. Harts comes out and long story short, DDP challenges Hart to a match and Hart accepts. - "Mean" Gene interviews Raven, who is quickly interrupted by Horace. Horse-ass gripes about he and the Flock getting screwed over by Raven. Quicker than a wink Raven announces a tag team match tonight, under "Raven's Rules", involving himself and Saturn against Horace and Kanyon. Both Kanyon and Saturn come out, with Saturn saying there's no way he'll tag with him. Raven calls him a coward, forcing Saturn to agree to be his partner, (the "Marty McFly Syndrome"). J.J. Dillon conveniently appears out of nowhere to make all this official, adding the stipulation that if any man causes his partner to lose he'll be suspended from WCW for 90 days. Given that Thunder has already been taped featuring all four of these guys we all knew that wouldn't happen. That makes two or three matches now which WCW would have us believe are "surprise" challenges. Duh--I wonder who all these wrestlers were scheduled to face before they made up their own matches? - HIGH VOLTAGE vs. ALEX WRIGHT/DISCO INFERNO Schiavone again mentions that RAW's main event is ten seconds long. Does WCW really want to provoke the WWF into running RAW live every week? Be careful what you ask for ... Nothing of a match which gets interrupted by Meng coming out and Tongan Gripping everyone to death. A few security guys get the throat tickle as well. Meng even proves to be immune to mace (or pepper spray) shot into his eyes by security, which is physiologically impossible unless you're high on PCP. Someone should have Meng pee in a cup, ASAP, 'cuz this guy's high on something. Where's this all leading? WCW already showed last week that Meng can't be beat ... except that Goldberg then beat him. - EDDIE GUERRERO vs. KONNAN Schiavone had hyped this match two or three times up to this point. Guess what? It doesn't happen. (I though WCW always delivered on their matches?) Eddie comes out with his luggage and wearing street clothes. In what's supposed to be a "shoot" interview he tells Eric Bischoff that he wants out of his contract--which probably means he signed a contract extension in the last week. Eyebrow raising, though obviously an attempt to cozy up to the "smart" fans by working them into thinking Eddie wants out. Eddie avoids swearing several times by saying "you-know-what" instead of the actual swear words one would say if they were shooting. The fans chant "Eddie sucks!", paying no attention to what he's saying. Look for the same to happen again in the future as the announcers did nothing to help Eddie put the situation into the context by which it's supposed to be received. That's what announcers are for and Schiavone and Tenay just went asleep for three minutes. Another Hour One comes to a close with a low number of matches and small amount of wrestling. HOUR TWO Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Zbyszko. - RAVEN/SATURN (w/ the Flock) vs. KANYON/MORTIS Schiavone and Tenay spend much of this match trashing RAW and the Internet fans and their "rumors". I truly hope said Internet fans were paying attention to this. This promotion seriously want me to give them any credit, pay any attention to them and like them whatsoever after they take such a large crap on my head? F**k you. WCW stinks, and no amount of Warrior hype is going to make up for that. This match was every bit as mediocre as every other match these wrestlers have had in the last four months. Nice moves are peppered throughout overly blatant spots. The stop sign comes into play again as Horace knocks out his partner accidentally and Saturn delivers a Death Valley Driver for the win. Post-match nonsense includes Raven DDT'ing Kidman, Horace nailing Saturn and Raven then beating on Horace. An okay match if you like these guys, but I don't, so I didn't care anything for it. I'll keep harping on the fact that if you can't get me interested in the characters in the first place then why should I care about their matches? This whole feud is supposed to culminate in a match between Raven and Saturn at the PPV. If Raven wins Saturn has to rejoin the Flock. If Saturn wins then the Flock will disband. Rumor has it that Raven is joining the NWO soon, so maybe we'll get lucky this time. - The Wolfpac members (Nash, Sting, Konnan and Lex Luger) come out and work the crowd. - Bobby Heenan replaces Zbyszko. - SCOTT NORTON (w/ Vincent) vs. SCOTT PUTSKI Squash. Norton gets the powerbomb win in less time than it takes RAW to hold a main event. - They show more of that Malenko footage, this time involving Curt Hennig. This is all designed to trick you into thinking Ric Flair is coming back. - Hogan, the Disciple and Bischoff come back out. Hogan picks up where his earlier blatherings left off, saying he's beaten every WARRIOR in wrestling. On cue, the lights dim, that phony *bzzzzt!* noise kicks in, some garbled voice is heard, fire erupts, and out walks the (ultimate) Warrior. I'm not going to waste much time with this nonsense. Hogan says he thought the Warrior was dead. The Warrior, in an incredibly long and rambling, pause-filled monologue, talks about how he beat Hogan, and has now come back to become a super hero. (I'm serious--that's what he said.) The Warrior takes a shot at the Internet too, saying that all the rumors about him coming were false, and that he just happened to decide to come of his own accord. (Yeah, and the production crew just happened to have an elaborate entrance worked up for you--just in case you happened to show, right?) The Warrior includes the Disciple in the conversation by noting "this dude must be your BARBER." He feigns ignorance as to Bischoff's identity. He tells Hogan that next week he'll be starting a revolution and Hogan should show up. He eventually disappears in a big cloud of smoke spewed from the ringposts. - They replay the Warrior's vanishing act. Nitro Girls, followed by a commercial (even though they've just come back from one a minute or so earlier). Once back they take ANOTHER commercial after two minutes before the match can even start. - CURT HENNIG (w/ Rick Rude) vs. DEAN MALENKO So-so match, which Hennig wins after Rude interference and the Hennig-Plex. HOUR THREE Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - In one of the weirdest (and possibly funniest--I haven't decided yet) moments ever on Nitro, Scott Steiner and Buff Bagwell come to the ring with some crazy looking homeless guy dressed as a doctor. Steiner has half his upper body wrapped in tape. The "doctor", named Cecil Schwartz by the muscular duo, has apparently ordered that Scott not wrestle Rick Steiner at Fall Brawl due to his injury. Any time they ask him a question he answers "right on!" (The rest of the time he makes funny faces, twitches, and acts like he's seeing things.) Rick Steiner comes out and says the usual. Truly weird. - Nitro Girls. - CHRIS JERICHO vs. STEVIE RAY vs. CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. In a barely remembered effort to finish up on something promised on Thunder, Schiavone (sort of) explains that the TV Title was indeed apparently declared vacant due to Booker T.'s injury, thus the belt was put up in a "top contenders" match between Jericho and Stevie Ray, meaning that Stevie was never officially the champ. As usual with WCW this is all hashed out as speculation rather than an outright explanation. Jericho's the champ no, and I guess that's all that matters. The match itself is nothing special. The finish comes after a ref bump. Chavo knocks out Jericho with a foreign object. Stevie then knocks out Chavo. The Giant then comes in and chokeslams Stevie. The ref comes to and starts to count. Jericho is the only one to make it to his feet before the ten count, giving him the win. - The Warrior again vanishes via replay. - BRET "HITMAN" HART vs. DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE An okay match, though by this point I was completely out of it as far as this show was concerned. After a lengthy bout with a lot of reversals and close teased finishes, Hart ends up slipping a foreign object in DDP's tights after using them (I suppose to prevent them from being found on himself). Instead of going for the pin, though, he puts DDP on himself (what the hell?) and kicks out at the two count. The match continues. Hart eventually goes for the Sharpshooter, but DDP reaches the ropes. DDP hits the Diamond Cutter which hurts Hart, but doesn't take him out (as it has every other man who's experienced it). Hart then fakes a sore face and tells the ref that DDP nailed him with something. The ref checks DDP's tights and DQ's him. A poor, overly contrived finish which conflicts with Hart's established character. He spent his entire earlier interview pointing out what a bad-ass "crippler" he is. He also always tells us he's "The Best There Is .... etc." This finish lives up to neither, merely earning a cheap win which, I may add, he could have gotten in two minutes instead of the more than ten or twelve he dragged the match out to. Why was Hart even trying if he knew he planned to get the cheap win the way he did? The match should have told a story of frustration in his inability to win, thus necessitating the use of the cheap tactic. It almost did, though the commentary necessary to polish that story was absent. If winning was all he wanted, why didn't he just knock out DDP with the object and pin him? Or if he just wanted to keep his belt, why not hit DDP, get DQ'ed, then go to work on the unconscious DDP's knee and slap on the Sharpshooter? The only reason I'm mentioning all this is that this match is earning some undue praise online, praise which I don't feel it completely earned. It was okay, but that's all. By the way ... wasn't Hart embroiled in a bitter feud with Lex Luger just FOUR DAYS earlier? Where was Lex tonight? Why should I look to this being the start of anything when they did the same (more, actually) with Luger just last week. Looks like crybaby Hart's got his vanity belt and is going to get some hit-and-run wins over the other top stars for the foreseeable future. - GOLDBERG vs. THE GIANT So as not to do a ten second main event they really stretch this one out with a lot of offense in and out of the ring. The intro's, as usual, are incredibly long. Goldberg eventually nails the spear, which causes the Disciple to run in, causing the DQ. Scott Hall then runs in. That brings out Kevin Nash. Goldberg tries to spear Hall but misses, hitting Nash instead (when Hall moves). Nash gets up and gets in Goldberg's face as the show ends. - This Thursday: "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan will beat Barry Darsow. Raven will win a "Four Corners" match involving Horace, Kanyon, and Saturn. Curt Hennig will get a DQ victory over Steve McMichael when Dean Malenko interferes. Stevie Ray will get a DQ victory over the Giant when members of NWO Hollywood interfere. The rest of the show will consist of Nitro clips. - Next week: Nothing announced. Comments: Sorry if the Recap comes off as rude this week, but WCW really rubbed me the wrong way, (surprisingly little of it due to the Warrior, actually). Just to get that out of the way, let me say this: on a scale from 1 to 10 I'd give the Warrior's debut a 6. It wasn't great, but it could have been much worse. The spooky theatrics were completely unnecessary, but his actual entrance was powerful. His speech was obviously heavily scripted, and while it hit all the points, the delivery was often slow and clunky. The Warrior comes across as quite intelligent, but just like his written stuff he is prone to complex rambling just to make a point which could be said with less words. He had a good rappor with the crowd, and got in some genuinely good shots. (The best of which coming when the fans chanted "Hogan sucks!", the Warrior responded "Let's talk about something he doesn't know!!!") I guess I liked this debut as much as I could given it was the Warrior we're talking about. From here on out, though, this will have been the best moment out of whatever is yet to come. The Warrior's name is now thrown into the hat with all the other talent. WCW's future TV and PPV cards get a little bit "bigger", though not really any "better". There'll be big moments and matches yet to come, but I doubt any of them will mean as much as this did. As the Warrior himself pointed out during his speech, simply beating Hogan doesn't mean anything, because everyone's already done it. About the only thing that could compare is if the Warrior becomes the one to get rid of the NWO once and for all. No, what really bugged me this week was Schiavone's constant shots at the WWF, not to mention the liberal shots taken at the Internet. I've no problem with them going after the competition, and I wouldn't mind if they tackled the poorer elements of the Internet, but in both cases they went too far. The shots at RAW literally came at least once during every match, constantly reminding us that RAW's main event would only be ten seconds long. Okay, so it's a short match, and doesn't really deliver what was advertised, but did WCW do any better here? Just because Goldberg's match was longer doesn't mean it was better. It too featured a screwy, non- definitive ending. And it's not as if WCW has the greatest track record in delivering main events. As far as the live issue, WCW is one to talk when they've just started pretaping Thunder every other week. It's not as if RAW's being taped has mattered much lately, as most every taped RAW in the last four months or so has kicked Nitro's ass. The WWF, at the snap of their fingers, could go live every week and deliver main events which would blow Nitro out of the water (which is what they've already done for most of the summer). It's pretty clear that WCW knew they were delivering a main event this week that was really no bigger than any other they've done in recent months and the best way they could assure a big audience (since they can't draw it solely by their own hype) was to sabotage the WWF's main event. This is always a can of worms WCW likes to open when they feel a bit cocky. It's just too bad that the WWF's TV schedule doesn't allow a chance for them to return the favor. More annoying and troublesome than this, though, was the shots at the Internet. Again WCW makes no distinctions of any kind--they just label ALL Internet fans with an unspoken "scum" label. That even includes those Internet fans who truly love WCW (and there's quite a few of them). They even mentioned the hotlines--ironic, since it was WCW's own hotline which officially confirmed the Warrior rumors days ago! (So, is it WCW's hotline that's bad, or just the "other" hotlines?) At the very least WCW's fans should send the message that they don't like being labeled as something they may not be, and if WCW takes that and goes on to narrowly define what they like and don't like about the Internet, well then fine. Until then, though, all wrestling fans on the Internet should wake up and realize WCW has declared their beliefs that we're all trash. That's a pretty miserable attitude to have about a group of fans who will be responsible for your ratings victory come Tuesday--should Nitro win (and I've no doubt it will). People can invent all the excuses here for WCW that they want, but I daresay none of them will be the very least valid until WCW itself voices them. My own bad mood aside, the live crowd was hot for the entire show. Other than the Warrior bit, though, I'm not sure that this show warranted that enthusiasm. There was some okay matches, and no real hugely awful moments, but nothing really stood out as being any more than "okay". I don't think a single match achieved any kind of universal acclaim as being all that "good". Online fans are making out over the Guerrero "shoot" for reasons they can't even explain. It was a so-so show made memorable by the Warrior debut. Oh, I forgot to mention: after the Warrior disappeared they flashed a Bat Signal in the air--except it had the Warrior's logo instead of Batman's. I'm not making that up. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF RAW is WAR: Live/Taped: Taped 8/11. Length: Two Hours+. Location: Des Moines, Iowa. WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. - Steve Austin is in the back trying to break down the door into Mr. McMahon's dressing room. He warns Vince that he's got about a minute to come out, before heading to the ring. After the opening "Highway to Hell" kicks in, while Jim Ross runs down tonight's card. The cameras and lights look to the stage for the arrival of Austin, then swing over to an open area where a long black hearse is pulling in. Steve Austin climbs out from behind the wheel, opens the back door, yanks a casket out and onto the floor, then opens it and pulls out a can of Coors. Austin hits the ring and calls for McMahon to come out, which he does after Pat Patterson, Jerry Brisco and Commissioner Slaughter have first put in appearances. Once McMahon and his stooges hit the ring Austin tells McMahon that he intends to take the Undertaker, load him in the hearse and drive him (and McMahon, if he interferes) down the Highway to Hell. Not a challenge for a match, merely a promise to kick the Undertaker's ass (a point which WCW missed in all their "10 second main event" bullshit). Ken Shamrock comes to the ring for the next match. - KEN SHAMROCK vs. OWEN HART vs. DAN SEVERN A dull match until it's all over. Owen and Shamrock fight the bulk of this Triangle Match, with Severn just standing back, content to let the other two tear each other apart. Eventually Shamrock gets the upper hand, and is on the verge of securing a submission when Severn moves in and applies the Dragon Sleeper chokehold. Owen adds in a few weak boots to Shamrock, who quickly passes out from Severn's attack, making the Beast the winner. He refuses to release the hold, bringing out extra referees and Steve Blackman, who nails Owen. Severn releases the hold, the slaps it on Blackman once his back is turned. Severn and Owen share a high-five on their way up the ramp. Once Shamrock comes to he snaps, sending all the officials scurrying. Blackman stands his ground and tells Shamrock what Severn did. - GODFATHER KAMA (w/ some ho's) vs. BART GUNN Brawl For All. Jerry Lawler engaged in a comedy bit which I'll come back to in a moment. Before the bout Kama told Bart that his offer for a night with the ho's wouldn't be made this week, as he intended to kick Bart's ass. The first round came and went with little happening. The second round, on the other hand, was one of the best of the entire tournament, with both men laying in some huge shots. Bart especially got in a string of huge lefts, actually knocking Kama down just as the round ended. Bart went into the third leading 20 to 0 and scored a knockout just a few seconds in. Bart and the other semi-final winner will square off next week in the final bout in front of a live Philadelphia crowd. That should be wild. After it's done Bart jaws at Ross, asking for some respect. Ross says you earn it, and that's what Bart is doing. Before the match Lawler received a phone call from "The President", who expressed his eagerness to get a look at Kama's ho's. "Even Monica knows I like it RAW!" he adds. I really could have done without this tonight. Shamrock and Blackman are in the back tearing the joint apart looking for Severn and Shamrock. They then give a quick shot of Gangrel, who makes his RAW debut next. After they've gone to black, an before the commercial starts, we hear a brief audio snippet of Jerry Lawler saying "Vince I know you were telling me to get that line-" Some kind of audio miscue, I assume. - Michael Cole breaks the news that Dan Severn will serve as Owen Hart's trainer for the "Lion's Den" match against Ken Shamrock at SummerSlam. An actual interview with the two would have been better, but we all know Owen is spotty behind the mic, while Severn makes John Wayne Bobbitt sound like Ric Flair. - GANGREL vs. "TOO SEXY" BRIAN CHRISTOPHER (w/ "Too Hot" Scott Taylor) Gangrel, AKA David Heath, AKA the Vampire Warrior, AKA Luna's husband, beat Taylor the night before on Sunday Night Heat. Before the match he chugs a cup of blood. then spews it in the air, drenching himself in the liquid. This match is a quick squash, with Gangrel using that same DDT variation to score the pin in a minute. Imagine a front waist-level suplex turned into a DDT: that's his finisher. Edge is shown taking an interest in Gangrel from his perch in the crowd. Future foe, or possible partner? Either one works for me. Goofy theatrics aside this gimmick might catch on. Michael Cole is in the back to get comments from Shamrock and Blackman. Shamrock warns him to beat it, then he and Blackman trash the set. After the break Cole tries again with DeGeneration X, but his luck is even worse there as the Nation shows up and everyone starts brawling. These two groups will go at it in an eight-man street fight later in the show. - THE DISCIPLES OF APOCALYPSE (w/ Paul Ellering) vs. FAAROOQ/SCORPIO Oh man, this is ratings death. Lawler gets more phoned comments from "The President", who ends his bit saying he has to go address the country, showing that the commentary for the show was either taped late in the afternoon or is, in fact, being piped out live to accompany the taped footage. Ross uses a good chunk of this match to run down upcoming live event dates. They wisely cut away to show some of the ongoing D-X/Nation brawl in the back. They alternate with match footage and the brawl until it spills out into the arena. Distracted by this, the ref misses the DOA pulling the switcheroo, ending up with Scorpio getting pinned. During the commercial they show a promo for the U.S. Open, with USA desperately trying to make tennis look as cool as the WWF. WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. - DEGENERATION X vs. THE NATION Street Fight. D-X come out first carrying garbage cans, sticks, etc. After Helmsley works the crowd the Nation comes out with similar plunder. The Rock has a ladder. This one doesn't live up to the billing as, much like the Public Enemy Street Fights in WCW, it's all repeated garbage can and cookie sheet shots. Most of the action is on the floor, where Jeff Jarrett and Southern Justice eventually show up to tangle with X-Pac and the New Age Outlaws. That leaves Helmsley at the mercy of the Rock, Mark Henry and D-Lo (the Nation was a man short as Owen had left the building and Kama was licking his wounds from earlier). Jarrett cuts a little of X-Pac's hair off, setting up their "Hair vs. Hair" match at SummerSlam. Helsmley, meanwhile, gets pulverized by the Nation. His face is bloodied, they beat him against (and beat him with) the ladder, and he's left for dead. The rest of D-X has to carry him out during the commercial, a clip of which we see in the next segment. - Tiger Ali Singh and his manservant Abu hit the ring. They show a clip from Sunday Night Heat of a guy eating a worm for $500. Tonight they get a fan to lick between Abu's toes for the same amount. This was truly gross. Two words: TOE JAM! A funny bit, but one which has no business being on RAW. The Undertaker still hasn't shown up (which we learn from a shot at a pair of doors in the back). Sable is shown stretching for her upcoming arm wrestling match. - SABLE vs. JACQUELINE Arm wrestling, which probably doesn't deserve a match header. Sable and Jackie are nice to look at, but this was a waste of time. After stalling and pretending to arm wrestle Jacqueline gets mad and dumps the table over on Sable. She then busts the Bikini Contest trophy over Sable's back (which was supposed to be the prize to the winner). I'm surprised that Luna would give that up. Marc Mero comes out, but he and Jackie immediately flee as the Oddities arrive. Luna cries as the Giant Silva carries Sable to the back. Like the preceding segment, this really isn't something that should be on RAW. In the back Michael Cole questions Val Venis about his upcoming "Gauntlet Match" against Kaientai. - Droz's World, replayed from Sunday Night Heat. - BRADSHAW vs. DARREN DROZDOV Brawl For All. Not nearly as good as the last BFA bout. Droz looks to have this one clearly won, but questionable scoring gives Bradshaw the win. Thank god this is one fight away from being gone forever. I'll have my final thoughts on the Brawl For All next week. - They show some clips of Al Snow as Lawler badmouths him (mentioning ECW in the process). They play a taped interview with Snow in a bar somewhere. He says he's back where he started after 16 years, mentioning his "Avatar" and "Leif Cassidy" characters. Al says he should have stayed in ECW. He then finds the Head drunk on the floor and demands that it give him it's car keys. "Friends don't let Heads drive drunk!" Al Snow is back, though they don't exactly bother to explain how (or why). Can't say as I'm wild about this, until Snow actually does something of note in the ring. A look at those doors shown earlier reveals that the cameraman has been taken out, apparently signaling the arrival of the Undertaker. - Dustin Runnels cuts another religious promo. I wish they'd get to the point in this one. Sable then heads to the ring. After the break she challenges Jackie to come out and fight. The two appear on the Titan-Tron and Jackie declines, saying she knows the Oddities are out there lurking around somewhere. She challenges Sable to get a partner and face them at SummerSlam. (But what if the matchmakers aren't interested in signing them to a match at SummerSlam? Isn't Jackie making a huge assumption here?) The Oddities the run in backstage and send Jackie and Mero packing. Kurrgan, Silva, Golga--take your pick: one of them will be Sable's partner at the PPV. - VAL VENIS vs. KAIENTAI (w/ Yamaguchi-san) Technically speaking, this is the main event. Now while it goes quite a bit longer than ten seconds (blowing Tony Schiavone's fat ass out of the water), it does raise some disturbing questions as to why this is the main event. Presumably the WWF figured that WCW would save the Warrior until the end of their show. Saving Austin to compete against that at the very end, that left the D-X Street Fight to be put in the middle of the show to get a bigger rating. The WWF maybe should have switched these two matches, putting this in the middle and saving D-X at the end to better compete against the Hart/DDP and Goldberg matches. That's the problem with being taped, though, and the advantage of being live. Had RAW been live they might have shuffled the line-up. The ones most hurt in all this strategizing and second guessing is probably the fans, who are stuck watching this good, but not great match so late in the show. Val comes to the ring with a pink squirt gun and, in his usual bit, offers some laundry tips to President Clinton. Val starts off against Teioh, who he must beat to advance against the other Kaientai members. Some nice moves in this quick match, with Val getting the win in a little over a minute with a German Suplex. Funaki then runs in, comes off the top, is caught and powerslammed by Val, and falls victim to Val's second pin. Togo then runs in and the two battle for a couple of minutes. Being the biggest and heaviest member of Kaientai, Togo fares pretty much the best. He plants Val with a nice DDT at one point. Val comes back with a sweet tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and monster powerbomb. He finishes him off with the Money Shot off the top. (Lawler almost singlehandedly ruins this fall by taking another call from "The President".) In the best fall of the match Taka scores the upset pin following the Michinoku Driver. Nice booking since Taka, being the Light Heavyweight Champion, should have been the one "good enough" to beat Val. The win also breaks the usual "heavyweights always beat light heavyweights" tradition. Had Val won he'd have gotten five minutes alone in the ring against Yamaguchi-san. Instead all members of Kaientai hold Val down as Mrs. Yamaguchi slaps him in the face for dishonoring her. Val gets a bit of payback by retrieving his squirt gun and spraying them all with goo. Call me nuts, but with the clean finish and stronger storyline going in I'd give this match the nod, beating out the Hart/DDP match, as being the best of the night. - They replay Austin's antics from the top of the show. We're already past the top of the hour as the lights go out for the Undertaker's entrance. He appears mysteriously in the ring, having come in by some direction other than the entryway. Austin then comes out to confront him. Instead of the Undertaker, though, it's Kane wearing his mask, but dressed in the Undertaker's outfit. No referee, no bell, no match, this is simply a fight, which lasts almost two minutes, as the two battle in the ring, brawl on the floor, and fight their way through the crowd to the parked hearse. Austin ends up tossing Kane in the back, slams the door shut, and goes over to start it up and drive down the "Highway to Hell". He finds the door locked, however, and is shocked to see the Undertaker sitting in the driver's seat. The Undertaker slams the hearse into gear and makes his getaway with his brother safely tucked in the rear. Austin follows the hearse through the curtains and watches as it pulls away down the tunnel. - Next week: Bradshaw vs. Bart Gunn in the Brawl For All Final. Comments: A better show than last week, though still not up to par with some of the shows earlier this summer. The problem is with everything locked into SummerSlam there's room for few surprises. The main event level of wrestling also suffers as Austin and the Undertaker are being kept out of the ring to save them for the PPV. It wouldn't surprise me to see one of them in action next week, with Austin either defending the belt against Mankind or Kane, or the Undertaker forced into a match against one of those two. The next level down of guys (Shamrock, Owen Hart, Maivia, Helmsley) are all held back a bit too as their angles take precedence over matches. Triple H is rumored to have a knee injury, so I doubt we'll see him involved in much of anything next week. Next week could be a huge show. Shawn Michaels MAY put in another color commentary appearance. Al Snow will be wrestling in front of the Philadelphia crowd. I'd look for the WWF to finally hand styrofoam heads out and let him do his thing. Scorpio, Terry Funk and Mankind are all also available to please the Hostile City crowd. The WWF has become a lot more "extreme" since the last time they rolled through town, and the potential is there for them to put on a memorable show. I wouldn't look for an ECW "invasion" or anything like that, though there are whispered Sandman and Pit Bull rumors which cause the eyebrows to raise. Couple in the shift in the ratings tide and you know the WWF is looking to do something big to head into SummerSlam with a bang. You know, if Tony Schiavone is going to be such a dick, he should at least get his facts straight. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Bottom Line: Not being live gave WCW a huge advantage, as they had a good idea of what to do and when. If you're wondering why the Warrior came out when he did, it's because that was during RAW's weakest portion. It's no surprise, then, that Nitro won the ratings battle this week: the first time they've gotten two straight wins since sometime this past spring. Nitro banged a big 5.0 in their first hour, pulling in a lot of RAW's viewers during the unopposed period. With the Warrior not debuting, the fans stuck around into the second hour, giving them another 5.0. The fans then started to trickle away, closing out the night with a still strong 4.7. The overall composite was a 4.9--big, but probably not as huge as WCW would have liked. RAW, forced to start with a chunk of their audience waiting for the Warrior debut, banged an okay 3.9. They then got a good number of their usual viewers back to close with a 4.4. The overall composite was a 4.2. The head-to-head hours were a tad bit closer because of Nitro's decline in hour three. There's a lot of interesting things to look at, and many of them should concern WCW just the tiniest bit. First off, the Warrior's debut drew a 5.0. I don't have the quarter hour ratings yet, but one can make one of two assumptions. First, that the Warrior interview banged a huge rating. Assuming it did, then WCW most have then lost an absolutely huge number of viewers for them to average out at a 5.0. Both Nitro and RAW have, in recent months, done quarter hour segments which came close to the 7.0 mark. One would have expected the same here for the Warrior. If that in fact did happen then Nitro would have had to have had a really low rating, somewhere in the 3.0 to 3.5 range, to even that out and end up with a 5.0 for the hour. That's not good news for WCW, despite the overall ratings win. The other, more likely possibility, is that the Warrior's debut spiked a score only moderately above a 5.0. If that's the case then viewerwise the moment will have attracted less attention than the recent Goldberg/Hogan match, the Bash at the Beach main event replay, and a number of Steve Austin RAW title defenses. The fact that they dipped in hour three has to have them scratching their heads as well. While it will be the first time in ages that it topped the War Zone's rating, it is still a sign that something somewhere is causing them to lose viewers. I don't have the quarter hour figures, so I can't tell yet if the culprit was Bret Hart and DDP, the Goldberg main event, or something earlier in that hour. Thunder did a 3.9 last week. Sunday Night Heat did a 3.4. All in all the best news for WCW is that when the ratings are published next week they will have the top three (wrestling) spots with Nitro, and maybe four depending on what the two hours of Thunder were. The War Zone will then follow, the first hours of RAW and Thunder, then Sunday Night Heat coming after that. "Monday Night Football" made its return this week, which may have hurt RAW and Nitro a bit. The President's address could also have put a dent in the numbers. Without either of these distractions RAW might have drawn their average rating, while Nitro might have gotten the monster score they were undoubtedly hoping for. The west coast feed thing may have finally come into play against RAW too, as the Warrior's debut made for too compelling a moment to save for a replay viewing. The networks will be coming back with new series episodes in the coming weeks, which will have their usual effect. There will also be a change to the ratings starting September in that the value of a ratings point will be going up slightly, meaning Nitro and RAW will actually have slightly lower numbers for drawing the same sized audience. It won't be much, but it may look as if the ratings for the two shows are slumping (when in reality they won't be). The effect should be minuscule, amounting to less than a tenth of ratings point. The Nielsen company is adding more homes to their meter system too, which may also effect both shows. Whatever happens, both shows should be affected equally. The Green Bay Packers are on MNF next week, so that could hurt again. There'll be no Presidential address to compete with, though. For all the two shows will be showing, RAW's being preempted by the U.S. Open should have the greatest effect for both shows. [Ratings figures courtesy 1Wrestling.com.] Now, a few weeks back I was faced with the dilemma of whether or not I should give Nitro the win because Goldberg beat Hogan. That too was a far from stellar show, and it was the moment and it's historical value which I decided to attribute the win too. This time around, though, I'm not so sure that I can be as charitable. At least with Hogan/Goldberg I can say I was, to a small extent, interested and entertained. Not this time. All the novelty of the Warrior's debut can't overcome the numerous slaps to my face as a wrestling fan. It's bad enough that the show was wrapped up in its usual insults to the average fan's intelligence, but to lay on the blatant shots at me being a WWF fan and me also being an Internet user! Some may say I shouldn't take it personal, but doggone it--if I don't, who will? WCW seriously slapped one of the hands that feed them this week, and while I can't change the world, or what they do, I'll be DAMNED if I'm going to give them the win without them earning it here in this thing that is solely mine. Call it bias if you wish, but I'd call it WCW pissing me off beyond the point of no return. This especially hurts after I had been giving them credit for improving themselves in recent weeks. WCW obviously doesn't have to cater solely to my tastes, but that's no reason for them to blatantly antagonize the type of fan I represent. For myself and the few fans who agree with me, we say "kiss our asses, WCW!", and declare ... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- This Week's Winner: RAW. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1998 by John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those of "Internet Access, Inc". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week. Volume One, Number 144 of the "Monday Night Recap", August 17th, 1998.