[RESULTS/OPINION] WCW Monday Nitro/WWF RAW is WAR (08/11/97) [Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #91] (08/11/97) Quick WCW Road Wild 1997 Results (08/09/97): - Harlem Heat defeated Buff Bagwell and Scott Norton with the help of Miss Jacquelyn. Stevie Ray pinned Scott Norton while Jacquelyn held on to Norton's boot. Jacquelyn is now the manager (or valet) of Harlem Heat. - Konan defeated Rey Mysterio Jr. with the Tequila Sunrise submission hold in a "Mexican Death Match". Konan was slow to release the hold when the match was over. Mysterio had to be helped from ringside. During the match, Mysterio's mask came off, though a clear shot of his face never occurred. - Steve "Mongo" McMichael and Chris Benoit defeated Jeff Jarrett and Dean Malenko in an "Elimination Match". Jarrett let Malenko wrestle the majority of the match, then allowed himself to be pinned by Mongo once he finally did tag in, (thus abandoning Malenko). Mongo pinned Malenko after a piledriver. - Alex Wright defeated Chris Jericho to retain his Cruiserweight Title. Wright pinned Jericho with a simple roll-up while holding his tights. - Ric Flair defeated Syxx via pinfall with his feet on the ropes for leverage. During the match, both men escaped from the other's finishing moves (Figure Four and Buzzkiller). - Curt Hennig defeated Diamond Dallas Page with the Hennigplex. Ric Flair came to ringside to distract Page. Page hit him with the Diamond Cutter, but the distraction allowed Hennig to apply his finisher. Page was busted open by an exposed turnbuckle shot during the match. - The Giant defeated Randy "Macho Man" Savage with the chokeslam after catching him coming off the top turnbuckle. - The Steiner Brothers defeated the Outsiders (Kevin Nash & Scott Hall) by disqualification. The Steiners had the match nearly won, having nailed Scott Hall with their doubleteam finisher. Hall was covered for the pin, but Kevin Nash grabbed the referee, drawing the DQ . The Outsiders retain their World Tag Team Titles, which angered the new manager of the Steiners, Ted DiBiase. - "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan defeated Lex Luger to win the WCW World Heavyweight Title for the third time. Hogan's New World Order tried to attack Luger, but he was able to hold them off (as he did when he won the title). As he signaled for the "Torture Rack" he was hit from behind by Sting (reportedly a fake) with a baseball bat. Hogan then hit a legdrop and covered for the pin. As Hogan celebrated, Dennis Rodman reapplied the "NWO" letters to the World Title belt with black spraypaint. WCW Monday Nitro: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Two Hours+. Location: Denver, Colorado. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Larry Zbyszko. - So Road Wild has come and gone and we're none the wiser for it (though some of you may be $30 poorer). WCW's promise of a more adult crowd turned out to be maybe 5000 drunken bikers who were for the most part more interested in throwing rocks than watching a wrestling card. As I predicted there was some blood, courtesy of Diamond Dallas Page, but WCW reverted to old form by pulling the camera way back, sparing the viewers the horror of DDP's bloody forehead (though not sparing anyone the horror of Dusty Rhodes' color commentary). With Hogan winning the title back, and Hall and Nash's massive egos refusing to relinquish their titles, WCW is now back to where it was exactly two weeks earlier (with the exception of Ted DiBiase and Jacquelyn latching on to new teams). That, and we've now had Scott Hall playing a fake Sting. On to Nitro ... - Back in the bowels of whatever arena they are in, a haggard-looking security crew hands the Giant a piece of paper. I'm sure most everyone immediately guessed this was a "restraining order" or something similar, particularly due to security chief Doug Dellinger being in the Giant's face. The Giant sort of looks at it and crumbles it up. We then get the opening (minus audio-ain't live TV grand?) Michael Buffer gets us ready to rumble, and finally the Nitro Girls do their best synchronized dance number yet. Yee-haw Nitro is on the air! I need a drink. - Hall and Nash (with Syxx, that dick) come out for a monologue. Or dialogue. Or rant, oratory, or some other form of public address that wouldn't be considered an interview. Hall says they like to give the people what they want (*snort!*) so they will put the titles on the line against the Steiner Brothers tonight. Actually they don't say it, but we get that impression when the Steiner's them music starts up. - THE OUTSIDERS (w/ Syxx) vs. "THE STEINER BROTHERS" Out comes a pair of fat jobbers (Bobby Starr & David Moore), who the Outsiders quickly pound to paste. Nash and Hall each then call for another team to come out. As my brother and I are speculating how many more jobber teams will come out until the real Steiners do, WCW ruins the moment by sending the actual Steiners out. Rick and Scott come in through the crowd and send the Outsiders packing. During the match Tony and Mike clue us all in to the fact that they've reviewed the tape of Road Wild and have figured out that it wasn't really Sting that hit Luger. Again it took them 24 hours to figure out what all the fans knew immediately. (Obviously they knew who it was, it's just that WCW thinks you guys are dumb). - WRATH (w/ James Vandenberg) vs. MENG A four star match, as far a "big man" matches go. Wrath nails Meng with a senton off the apron to the floor. Meng suplexes Wrath off the top turnbuckle. Wrath lands a flying clothesline/shoulderblock off the top. Meng gets the somewhat surprising win with the Tonga Nerve Hold, forcing Wrath's shoulders to the mat for the three count. Mortis then does a run- in, but the Barbarian makes the save. The encounter ends with the two teams staring down-Mortis and Wrath in the ring, Barbarian and Meng on the floor. - Mean Gene Okerlund interviews the Steiners and Ted DiBiase. All involved say they still plan on taking the titles from the Outsiders. (Yeah, right. What is it they say? "Fool me once, shame on you ... fool me twice, shame on me ... fool me three times, kiss my ass!") DiBiase then calls out referee Nick Patrick, criticizing him for DQ'ing the Outsiders at Road Wild. Patrick responds by saying he let the match go on as long as he could. He then criticizes fellow referee Randy Anderson for allowing all the NWO interference in the Luger/Hogan match. - EDDY GUERRERO vs. CHRIS JERICHO Jericho starts off in control, slamming Eddy, then working on him in the corner. Eddy rolls to the floor after a spinning heel kick landed by Jericho (which followed a series of leapfrogs and bouncing off the ropes and stuff). After some stalling Eddy gets back in the ring and begs Jericho not to hurt, which is all a ploy so that he can lay in a poke to the eye. He whips Jericho into the ropes, takes him down to the mat, and hits a drop-kick to the head. He sends Jericho into the corner, but Chris turns the tables on Eddy and sends him into the opposite corner. Sending Eddy to the mat, Jericho then tries a springboard moonsault, but Eddy brings his knees up. After some jockeying back-and-forth and a few failed pin attempts Jericho hits a belly-to-back suplex. After a two count he then nails a Tiger Driver powerbomb, followed by a swinging leg swing- thing thing swing something. Jericho makes himself dizzy, while Eddy stumbles out of the ring. Jericho's last hurrah is then a plancha to the floor on Guerrero. He tosses Eddy in and goes up to the top, but Eddy hits the ropes, knocking Jericho to the mat. Eddy quickly climbs up and lands a Frog Splash for the win. I went to the bathroom while this match was on. I didn't even watch it on the replay. I watched much of it for this recap pressing the fast forward button. Okay moves aside, it was meaningless. Eddy is still totally unconvincing to me as a heel. There was little crowd reaction to the finish, with what reaction there was being about evenly divided between workrate fans cheering for Eddy and those few fans genuinely distressed that Jericho lost. Speaking of whom, I now feel that Jericho's recent Cruiserweight Title reign has seriously devalued the belt. Look who has it now, for God's sake! All the true world class cruiserweight athletes are either in the TV or US title divisions, or are engaged in the all- encompassing "La Rasa" feud. Despite WCW's claims that this is an "international" title, the last several champions have been Jericho, Syxx and Dean Malenko. Okay, so Alex Wright is German, but he sucks, so that doesn't count. - The Nitro Girls come out and do a terribly uncoordinated dance, which is quickly broken up by Alex Wright. Mean Gene comes over for an interview. Alex says he's German, the fans are losers, etc. When out of ideas, steal something that is currently working for the WWF. - DEAN MALENKO vs. JEFF JARRETT (W/ Debra McMichael) Mike Tenay says that Jarrett's cozying up to Malenko recently was all a ploy to get him into the Elimination Tag Match at Road Wild. Tony asks the question "why?" So do we all. Dean has all the early offense, with Jarrett leaving the ring, teasing a return to the dressing rooms. The crowd is really behind Malenko. Jarrett finally decides to leave, but is halted by Steve McMichael's presence in the entryway. They then go to commercial. Jarrett and Malenko are on the floor. Malenko grabs the ref, as well as Debra, and probably should have been counted out or DQ'ed, but none of that happens. Jarrett tosses him into the steps, then takes control for a few minutes in the ring. Malenko makes a comeback and starts to apply the Texas Cloverleaf. In a hilarious shot, we see Eddy Guerrero come through the entryway and run all the way into the ring, hitting Malenko from behind. (Make a racecar motor noise as Eddy makes the long run in and you'll probably crack yourself up). Malenko wins via DQ. Eddy and Jeff beat on Malenko until Mongo McMichael runs in for the save. Mongo extends his hand to Dean, but he'll have no part of it and kicks McMichael in the gut, then knocks him to the floor. Mongo tells us "That guy's tougher than a nickel steak. I got respect for that!" Yeah, so it looks like Dean MAY be the next Horseman. Big deal. I've stopped caring. The Four Horsemen died when Tully Blanchard left, and cain't no one tell me different. Why not Dean, though? The Horsemen have always stood for something, and Benoit and Mongo simply do not fit in with that philosophy. Neither does Dean, so he's a perfect fit for the current stable. The best Horsemen of recent years was also the one kicked out: Jeff Jarrett. What really makes me laugh, though, is how these recent developments have punched a hole in all that authoritative speculation (passed of as "insider info") that Jarrett would be forming his own anti-Horsemen team. Uh-uh. This is obviously false, and now the best WCW can claim is that Jarrett conspired with Guerrero all along to pull one over on Malenko. Tony Schiavone points out after the match that it was Guerrero that helped Jarrett beat Malenko for the U.S. Title in the first place. This will all, of course, lead to a Jarrett/Guerrero vs. Malenko/Mongo tag match at the next PPV. This is how WCW works, see? They make up a meaningless match for an upcoming PPV, then work backwards, booking matches to play out to the eventual PPV match. That's why so little of what takes place on WCW's midcard ever reaches a resolution. It's an endless string of connect-the- dots, with the PPV matches meaning no more than the Nitro matches that lead up to it. They then gauge the fan reaction at the PPV, and if what they tried didn't work, they shuffle the workers around into different match-ups for the next PPV, then lay in a series of matches to set that up. Finishing off the previous angle, or resolving existing feuds, is that last thing WCW is concerned with. If what they tried did work, then they keep doing it until it no longer works. (I realize I may have just described wrestling itself in a nutshell, but the difference lies in WCW's continued refusal to deliver a payoff for any ongoing feuds or angles). Given the above rarity in satisfying conclusions to storylines, and the fact that there are approximately 52 Nitro's to 12 PPV's in a year, the odds are already, at best, 4:1 against anything significant happening at any given WCW PPV. Remember that the next time you are about to call your local cable company or satellite operator to order that "must see" PPV. It wouldn't surprise me if some day the Horsemen kick Ric Flair out of the group because he's too old. - Mean Gene interviews Ric Flair and Curt Hennig. Flair says he just saw Hennig talking with Eric Bischoff and he wants to know what that is all about. Hennig says he was talking to Bischoff, that he has business with him. Flair says he's promised to bring Hennig into the Horsemen and wants an answer from Curt. Hennig skirts the issue by hyping his main event match tonight with Randy Savage. He will neither confirm nor deny he is a Horseman. Flair then asks Hennig if he will be his partner in the match against Syxx and Konan next week at the Clash of the Champions. Hennig says he will, but that still doesn't necessarily make him a Horsemen. - Eric Bischoff rides a chopper halfway to the ring. Scott Norton accompanies him on foot. Bischoff gets on the house mic as Buff Bagwell, Scott Hall and Syxx come out. Bischoff congratulates Hogan on winning the belt. They then sing "Happy Birthday" to Hogan, who is up in Montreal filming a movie and turns 70 or 80 this week. Eric then says he got a restraining order preventing him from coming within 50 feet of him tonight. Buff Bagwell then paces off 20 or 30 feet from the ring and sprays a black line on the aisle floor. Predictably the Giant comes out. Even with Larry Zbyszko and Doug Dellinger holding him back, the Giant takes one step across the line, which gets him arrested. What pure, unadulterated bullshit! First off, a restraining order cannot be imposed against someone in the course of their gainful employment or at their residence, meaning that so long as the Giant is employed by WCW and scheduled to wrestle in that arena, then Eric Bischoff could not deliberately put himself in a position where the order would obviously be violated. That's the same as if he got the restraining order, then deliberately walked up to the Giant at work, or went up to his front door of his home and rang the bell. His own actions would nullify the restraining order. Since Bischoff is NWO and not compelled by any obligation by WCW to be in that arena, then WCW could easily have him ejected from the building if the possibility of said bogus restraining order could be violated. In other words, Bischoff cannot be allowed to place himself in a situation where he could trick, cajole, or goad the Giant into breaking the restraining order. Finally, assuming both he and the Giant were WCW employees and obligated to be in the building, then it would be up to WCW to keep the two separated, and they would be liable for any infractions that occurred. Thusly, the shot we saw at the beginning of the show should have been footage of WCW kicking the Giant or Bischoff out of the building. When the Giant crumpled up the restraining order, he should have immediately been escorted out of the building at that time. Finally, the Giant "violated" the order long before he stepped over that line, since that was way short of 50 feet. However, 50 feet in legal terms is more like a guideline than anything else. It prescribes a general distance in which the offender is not allowed to approach. Were it a real restraining order, Bischoff could have compelled the police to remove the Giant from the building at any time, and would just as easily been able to enforce the order the moment the Giant appeared in the entryway. Spraypainting a line that said "50 feet" was and is meaningless. The police should have surrounded him long before he even reached that line, and his crossing it did not suddenly constitute his defying the restraining order. The Giant finally says, "okay, let's go to jail" or something like that and walks away; but not before letting out a roar and the chokeslam sign. Sorry, but he should have been handcuffed right there the second he "crossed the line" and the officers made the decision to arrest. He should also have spent the night in jail, and stayed in jail until a bail hearing was set. Then, once released on bail, he and Bischoff would have to return to Denver several times over the next year for various plea hearings and the eventual trial. I could go on, but why continue to elaborate on WCW's fiction? The whole upshot of this is that Bischoff and the Giant should never be in the same arena again, since such an incident would mean, in this ridiculous scenario, hard jail time for the Giant. Kind of like the time Sting and Lex Luger stole that police car, or the Outsiders attempted murder by running the Steiners off the road. Scott Hall then picked on Larry Zbyszko as the Giant was being escorted out. Larry teased retaliation, but nothing happened. (By the way, I've never had a restraining order on myself, so don't get any ideas! I do, however, come from a small redneck town where stuff like that is common). That ended hour one. It was probably among the best wrestled first hours in a long time, but the garbage involving the "restraining order" really left a bad impression. HOUR TWO Hosted By: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - The Nitro Girls do a dance in the ring. I defy anyone to watch this bit and not regard them as anything more than cheerleaders. They show a quick clip of Harlem Heat and Jacquelyn on the "Internet Insiders" audio show, with that smart-ass Mark Madden. - CHRIS BENOIT/STEVE MCMICHAEL vs. THE STEINER BROTHERS People (mostly WCW fans) dump on the Road Warriors over in the WWF for their lack of talent. The Steiners have degenerated to the point where they are barely any better. The finish comes when Mongo, surprisingly, comes off the top rope with a double axehandle. Rick Steiner catches him and takes him over with a belly-to-belly suplex, which dumped Mongo on his head and could easily have killed him if blown any worse. Rick covers for the pin. Yep, the Horsemen suck. Malenko would be stupid to join this stable. The announcing crew mentions that Mean Gene, Bobby Heenan and Curt Hennig will be in Minneapolis this Friday to sign autographs as tickets go on sale for Monday Nitro at the Target Center, October 6th. Heenan quips that being it's August, he'll have to "pick up a snowmobile suit, earmuffs and handwarmers!" Hah (son-of-a- ... ). - Mean Gene interviews Lex Luger, who in a rambling, bumbling interview says WCW is at it's strongest. (I think he almost accidentally says "WWF" again). Luger, now on the downside of the greatest push of his career, still can't remember the name of the federation he's currently in. - Nitro Girls. Do they ever watch tapes of themselves to see how bad they are? I hear Kimberly does this for a living. (Don't quit your night job). - BUFF BAGWELL (w/ Vincent) vs. DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE (w/ Kimberly) Bagwell draws great heat as a heel because so many fans think he's "one of them". Think about it. Page puts him away with the Diamond Cutter after Bagwell accidentally collides with Vincent on the apron. - MORTIS (w/ James Vandenberg) vs. ULTIMO DRAGON Dragon wins with the Dragon Sleeper (choke) when Mortis "taps out". (Ooh ... just like the UFC!) I've seen some positive reviews for this match, which make me just shake my head. Mortis is one shade above dreadful, and did little to distinguish himself in this match. - Mean Gene interviews J.J. Dillon. Dillon has a contract for Sting to wrestle Syxx. (What a dumbass). Sting drops from the rafters and tears it up. Mean Gene yells "Sting, what do you want?!" The crowd chants "Hogan!" and Sting points to the fans. I'm sure Dillon is pretty quick to pick up, so next week he'll offer Scott Hall. Good God, WCW, get off your ass and get with the f***ing program, you dumb (*bleep!*) and (*bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!*) in the ring (*bleep!* - *bleep!*) before we all (*bleep!*) and (*bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!*) buyrate (*bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!* - *bleep!*) and the horse he rode in on. - CURT HENNIG vs. RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE Hennig looked exactly like what he is: a man ten years past his prime. (Five, at the very least). Savage wrestles a match almost totally devoid of actual wrestling moves, while Hennig does a his head-snap flip and the bump he takes where his opponent kicks him in the leg and Hennig flips in the air like he's been shot. Other than that, it may as well have been Lex Luger vs. Jim Duggan in the ring. Diamond Dallas Page eventually runs in, giving the match to Hennig via DQ. Scott Hall follows and he and Savage beat on Page, and beat on him, and beat on him, and beat on him, until Lex Luger runs in for the save. Tony and crew kill the last minute with commentary, giving the Road Wild replay one more plug. The Nitro Replay them immediately starts, which is really annoying. - Next week: Nothing announced. Comments: The first hour wasn't bad, so long as you don't mind fairly okay wrestling action mixed with horsecrap. The second hour was a total blow-off, featuring four marquee matches that delivered very little in the way of decent action. The Sting/Dillon segment was even more infuriating because every WCW detractor over the last week said they were going to do it, and they did. I'm sure many like myself predicted as such, yet hoped deep down that WCW would prove us wrong and actually advance the storyline. They didn't, and WCW continues to dangle Sting on a string, promising that earth-shattering, apocalyptic showdown with Hogan which can now never live up to it's hype (especially since Luger has not only beat him two or three times now, but actually won the title in doing so. Hell, even Piper put him out with that sleeper last December). Beating Hogan, no matter how much it may be anticipated, is no longer a rare thing. Even winning the belt from him has lost it's magic. Sting will now have to not only beat Hogan, but win the title, leave him a bloody mess, and in doing so shatter the NWO once and for all for this angle to remotely begin to pay off all the buildup to it. This isn't like Hart/Michaels where the payoff was a tremendous one hour match. More than likely Sting will keep the "dark" character and no-sell most everything Hogan throws at him, winning quickly and fairly easily with the Scorpion Deathlock. Hogan will then quietly move on to whatever it is that will most soothe his ego, since he'll pretty much be out of the title picture for good. Will they do it again next week? With almost a month to kill until the next PPV, I wouldn't bet against it. Remember what I said above about WCW being at about the same place they were a week before Luger won the belt? Well, except for the knowledge that Steve McMichael respects Dean Malenko, they still haven't moved much. Oh yeah ... that, and the Giant "went to jail" *Snort!* Did you know there's a Clash of the Champions next Thursday? You'd barely know it from this show. About the only thing that was hyped was the Flair/ Hennig/Syxx/Konan match. I believe Page and the Giant are supposed to face Hall and Savage as well. Other than that, expect a show much like this one. If I remember right, the last Clash was actually worse than the Nitro that was on the night before. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF RAW is WAR: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Two Hours+. Location: Biloxi, Mississippi. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. - They start off with a dramatic recap of last week's events. Then a shot of Shawn Michaels in the back telling the cameraman to get lost. - Shawn Michaels comes out for an interview. He still maintains he did a fair job as referee at SummerSlam. He then goes on to say that he learned about his match tonight with Mankind while watching Superstars, and that the guy who runs the WWF (looks at McMahon) didn't have the guts to call him personally. Shawn calls him a "nimrod", which prompts McMahon to add that this is why he isn't doing the interview this week. Before he can continue, a loud "Shawn is gay!" chant breaks out. Shawn acknowledges it, then, without missing a beat, says "why don't you ask your sister and your momma how gay Shawn is?" Shawn invites the Undertaker to watch tonight's match. Shawn then says the WWF has put him on their "hit list", and that Sgt. Slaughter better keep his big chin out of his business. (A quick shot of McMahon shows he is definitely enjoying Shawn's performance). Shawn says he wants the spotlight all to himself. Sgt. Slaughter comes out and tells Shawn he has no interest in his spotlight, and he'd be best off putting up AND shutting up. Shawn mugs for the camera, making fun of the Sarge's chin, then pretends to wipe spit off his face as Slaughter bellows on. Shawn wraps things up by saying that since the WWF has it out for him, and since everyone is out to hurt him, that he's brought in a little ... little ... BIG insurance policy. Mocking Slaughter, he signs off with a salute and "that's ... an order!" They cut to the back where Road Warrior Hawk is warming up for his "Country Whippin' Match" with Henry Godwinn. Hawk has a strap and is whipping a steel barrel while squealing like a pig. - ROAD WARRIOR HAWK (w/ Animal) vs. HENRY O. GODWINN (w/ Phineas) The rules in this are that each man has a strap which he can use freely. There is no DQ, and the only way you can win is to dump your opponent over the top rope to the floor, with both feet touching the ground. Owen Hart and the Bulldog take a seat at ringside to watch the match. During the match the two argue over who gets the honor of challenging the Patriot to a match later in the evening. Owen and the Bulldog play "Alphonse and Gaston" (or is that "Goofus and Gallant"). I'll spare everyone the agony and jump ahead to the finish: Hawk is in control of the match until Phineas Godwinn runs in. Since there is no DQ, the match continues. Henry hangs Hawk with his strap until Animal runs in and hits both Godwinns with the slop bucket. Henry tumbles over the top rope and Hawk is declared the winner. - They show a pretaped clip of Slaughter giving Brian Pillman his dress for tonight's match. Goldust and Marlena then come out to sit in during the next match. Goldust says he has prepared a new "Shattered Dreams" production, which they view as the next match proceeds. - SCOTT PUTSKI vs. TONY WILLIAMS Only about a quarter of the screen is taken up by the match, as the rest features the return of the "PervCam": a black-and-white camera in the lockerroom films Brian Pillman undressing and struggling into his slinky gold dress. This was hilarious, in a sick and twisted way. Jerry Lawler yells for Pillman to notice the camera, but there is no audio connection. Ross and McMahon's comments waver from amused to disgusted. Pillman, having trouble squeezing into the dress, gets frustrated and tosses chairs, yells, stomps around, and generally puts on a good show. Sgt. Slaughter eventually comes out and boots Marlena and Goldust from ringside. Putski wins his squash with the Polish Hammer. - The WWF runs down their upcoming schedule, including a big house show at the Fleet Center in Boston, a show in Chicago being dubbed "Saturday Night's Main Event", and the huge RAW is WAR scheduled for Madison Square Garden. - They show a brief clip of the Dustin Rhodes interview, hyping the upcoming issue of RAW Magazine. - BRIAN PILLMAN vs. FLASH FUNK Pillman, in the dress, has to be shoved through the curtain. Jim Ross then hypes ECW's Hardcore Heaven '97 PPV, mentioning Jerry Lawler's match with Tommy Dreamer, as well as Sabu. They show a clip from Sgt. Slaughter in the back, who announces that he will let both Owen and the Bulldog face the Patriot and a partner of his choosing. Pillman and Funk are actually putting on a pretty decent match when Goldust and Marlena come out to the stage. Goldust lays on his side with some popcorn, while Marlena looks up at the TitanTron. The footage of Pillman getting dressed plays. Pillman, now distracted, falls prey to a roll-up by Funk, who scores the pinfall. Pillman must wrestle yet again in a dress next week. Even McMahon admits that maybe the WWF is pushing Pillman too far. At least he was wearing normal shorts this week. Man, when Pillman finally snaps ... - They run a promo selling copies of SummerSlam on video for only $23.95 plus $6 shipping, which actually makes it a bit less than the cost of ordering it on PPV. D'oh! Nice packaging for the tape. - They run a clips package chronicling Steve Austin's neck injury. - Dude Love comes to the ring for an interview. The groupies are back in the front row. They pretty much just hype the "Fatal Four Way Match" at Ground Zero, which is a four-way match between Austin/Love, the Legion of Doom, the Godwinns, and Owen/Bulldog. Whoever wins the match gets the titles. McMahon then asks if Mankind will defeat Shawn Michaels tonight. Love says if Mankind slaps on the Mandible Claw, then it will be all over. Shawn comes on the big screen and derides Love. "You're not me. Jesus ... you're not even you! You nimrod!" He promises to stick his foot down Mankind's throat. Dude Love wraps up the interview, then dances the segment away with his two groupies. They end the hour with comments from some of the fans, some of whom predict a win for Shawn-some for Mankind. The last thing they show is the Patriot talking to someone blocked from the camera's view by the Patriot's back. An okay first hour. Light on wrestling action, heavy on angles and really good interviews. All the big matches have been saved for the second hour. (There was another point earlier in the show where they went to the fans for comments, which I forgot to mention at the appropriate point above. Most of that was anti-Shawn comments). HOUR TWO Hosted By: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. - OWEN HART/BRITISH BULLDOG vs. THE PATRIOT/??? Owen dedicates tonight's win to his brother Bret. Awww ... that's sweet. Bret is shown during the match watching on a monitor in the back. As you'd probably guessed by now, Ken Shamrock is the mystery partner. Shamrock gets a huge pop as he enters. I'd really love to do the blow-by- blow on this one, but it would take forever, and I'd like to get this thing done sometime soon. I'll beg your indulgence and jump ahead near to the finish: Bret comes out to the top of the ramp. Shamrock takes a ton of punish- ment, eventually making the hot tag to the Patriot. The Patriot cleans house. Shamrocks sees Bret and waves him on down to the ring. Bret advances, but is cut off by Sgt. Slaughter. Owen Hart, meanwhile, slides a steel chair into the ring. He then goes over to Shamrock, which brings the ref to the floor to break them up. The Bulldog makes a grab for the chair, but the Patriot puts him in the full nelson and slams him on the chair. He covers and gets the three count. Good match, marred somewhat by a typical WWF finish. McMahon calls the Bulldog a Canadian. - They show footage of fans in Canada awaiting Bret Hart's arrival home, as well as comments from Hart. They then show Shawn Michaels in the back discussing strategy with someone, showing the mystery person only from the back. My brother thought it was Dan Severn, while I was betting on Barry Windham. Shawn chases off the cameraman before we get too good a look. (Once you learn who it is it's fairly obvious. At the time, though, it could have been anyone with short, dark hair). - The Patriot launches into comments regarding Bret Hart, and is jumped by Hart for his trouble. Officials swarm in. - FAAROOQ vs. CHAINZ Sgt. Slaughter has banned the other NOD and DOA members from ringside. They show the clip of the Nation dumping Ahmed Johnson last week. A quick stompfest, as the two big guys do their best Jurassic Park imitations. The ref takes a bump just before Chainz makes the cover. In comes Rocky Maivia to check on the ref. Chainz goes over to ask for Rocky's Peach Cobbler recipe and Maivia gives him a half-nelson slam to the mat. Faarooq rolls over on top and gets the three count. Rocky then stands beside his new mentor and delivers the Nation of Domination salute. Out with the old, in with the new. Back from the break they cut to the Nation's dressing room where Rocky is being welcomed to the team. Faarooq quickly spots the cameraman and slams the door shut. The Disciples of Apocalypse then come to the close door and start beating on it. WWF officials swarm in to maintain control. - Sable comes out to introduce the next match and HOLY GEEZ IS SHE HUGE! Stacked, I mean! Even Lawler and Ross point out the increase ... in her popularity. Whatever match was (or wasn't) scheduled never happens as the Patriot comes to the ring and calls out Bret Hart. Hart comes out and the two brawl. Bret lets him lay in the punishment until Owen, the Bulldog and Pillman come out. It's a four-on-one beating, which is eventually broken up by WWF officials, but not before they leave him laying in the ring covered by the Canadian flag. - Comments from Mankind. McMahon (at least twice in the show) calls the Michaels/Mankind match from "Mind Games" the Slammy award winning match of the year. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't the Michaels/Hart match win that award? Michaels/Mankind was only nominated. - Brakus. Coming soon. - SHAWN MICHAELS vs. MANKIND Shawn actually gets a louder positive reaction than Mankind (though that's probably due to all the teenage boys and girls in the crowd). Mankind brings a plastic garbage can with him, which he tosses into the ring. Michaels cuts him off and stomps him against the ropes. He then nails him with the garbage can a couple of times, then puts it over Mankind's head and delivers a double axehandle off the ropes onto the can. Jim Ross again hypes ECW's PPV, Hardcore Heaven '97, Sunday, August 17th, 9:00 PM Eastern. McMahon plays annoyed. Shawn pulls the garbage can off, but the bag is still over Mankind's head. Mankind slaps on the Mandible Claw. Shawn starts to slump to the mat, but delivers a shot to the jewels, which breaks the hold. Mankind rolls to the floor still wearing the garbage bag. Shawn tries a baseball slide, but Mankind moves and catches him with a fist to the chops. Ross again hypes ECW's PPV, and McMahon acts even more annoyed. Mankind slams Michaels into the ring steps, then hoists Shawn up and drops him into a pile of chairs and the ring railing. Mankind slides in and out of the ring, breaking the ten count. He then charges Shawn, but Shawn backdrops him onto McMahon's table. Mankind bounces to the floor, possibly catching Lawler in the face with a boot by accident (couldn't really tell from the camera angle). Just as Mankind gets up, Shawn leaps off the ring apron and hits an elbow shot, landing square on the table (which probably was supposed to break by now, but unfortunately didn't). Mankind staggers over to the ring apron and Shawn (standing on the apron) kicks him in the head. He then drops down and tosses him into the steps. Shawn breaks the ten count, then comes back out to trade blows. Both men roll back into the ring. Jim Ross begins to question where Shawn's "insurance" is. McMahon and Lawler test their equipment to see if they are still hooked up. Shawn scoop slams Mankind, then lays in an elbowdrop off the top a la Randy Savage circa 1987. Shawn signals for the Superkick, stomps, and misses when Mankind ducks below the kick. Mankind slaps on the Mandible Claw again, but both men tumble through the ropes to the floor. Shawn, still in the claw, grabs Mankind's head and slams it into the ring post. (The thud it makes will give you a queasy stomach). He does it again, which sounds even worse. A third time and Shawn Michaels is the evilest man on the planet today! Well, no, but he does kick ass. Shawn picks Mankind up and back suplexes him onto the table, which still won't break. Cut to the ramp, where Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Chyna are heading to the ring. It's the Clique, bay-bee! Commercial. Shawn has Mankind in the ring and is working on the back of his head. He pulls off the mask and plays with it, then hits Mankind with it. Shawn stomps and punches Mankind into the corner, then whips him to the opposite one. He follows and dives. Mankind moves, and Michaels slams his shoulder into the post. Mankind tries to drop an elbow, but Shawn moves and gets back up to his feet. A whip into the ropes and Shawn slaps on a sleeper. Mankind backs him into the corner, smashing him against the turnbuckles. He charges, but Shawn moves, and Mankind hits his head on the top of the post. McMahon says Shawn has a cut on both his face and arm, but it's hard to see any blood. Shawn drops Mankind to the canvas with a flying forearm. Shawn covers for a two count as they replay via split-screen his insane elbowdrop onto the table. Shawn drags Mankind's face across the top rope, but Mankind punches his way loose, then slams Shawn's face into the turnbuckles. Shawn punches his way loose, then rakes the eyes. Shawn puts a boot against Mankind's throat and stretches, doing a standing split. Shawn takes a second to catch a breather, which allows Mankind to grab him and slam him to the mat. He drops on top and starts pummeling. He slams Shawn's head against the mat, then gives the crowd a "Bang! Bang!" He beats Shawn down in the corner with blow after blow, then hits a knee charge. Shawn crawls on the mat as Mankind rips some of his hair out. The crowd suddenly gets louder and Jim Ross yells "look, look, it's ... !" Ravishing Rick Rude. (Aaaarrarragh ... I'm marking out!) Rude strolls to the ring in a suit and tie. The crowd doesn't give that much reaction, though there is a definite negative rumbling heard. Mankind tosses Shawn into the corner, where Shawn does his flop. Mankind follows with an elbowdrop, but Shawn does a hanging sit-up and Mankind misses. Shawn gains his footing on the second rope and comes off with a double axehandle, but Mankind catches him with a shot to the throat. A kick to the gut follows, then a double arm DDT. Mankind covers for two as Rude does the usual silent bodyguard bit at ringside. Mankind backs to the ropes, preparing to perform a move, but is tripped by Hunter Hearst Helmsley (who had made his way to the side opposite where Rude stood watching). Rude quickly makes his way around the ring and shoves a WWF flunky off his seat, grabs the steel chair, then waffles Mankind on the head. Shawn has the ref tied up on the other side of the ring, while Helmsley was holding Mankind in place for the shot by the arm. Mankind staggers back ... right into a Superkick from Michaels. Shawn covers for the pin. McMahon tries to plant a seed of doubt in our minds by speculating that it looked like Rude was trying to hit Helmsley, but Helmsley had ducked. Shawn further confuses things by looking somewhat puzzled and afraid of Helmsley and Rude at ringside. To further confuse things, the Undertaker chooses that moment to come out. He only gets partway to the ring, though, when Paul Bearer appears on the giant screen and begins screaming that he's a murderer. The Undertaker's purple light turns red, flickers, and flames appear on the stage. The show ends with flames filling the screen. Yow ... angle overload! - Next week: Brian Pillman in a dress ... yet again. Comments: I don't think it's exaggeration to say this was among the half dozen best matches on TV this year. I expected a blow-off match and a lame surprise, and instead got a match a dozen notches more intense than I'd hoped for, and an angle that rocked the wrestling world. Just the speculation as to what Rude's appearance means is enough to make the most diehard fan work himself into a frenzy. I wouldn't assume anything yet myself. This may only be a one-shot deal to spark interest into the ECW PPV. I also wouldn't declare the WWF/ECW co-promotional whatever back on yet. It may just be a coincidence that Al Snow (aka Leif Cassidy) just showed up in ECW last Saturday. Rude's appearance may just be payback for Lawler appearing on their PPV. But what if it isn't? I'm not going to speculate any further, just suggest that we all watch this week's installment of ECW Television, catch Hardcore Heaven if possible, and stay tuned for next week's RAW is WAR. (By the way, I plan on getting the PPV this Sunday. If time permits on Monday, I'll try and do a recap of it for my site). I'm actually surprised at how focused the WWF is in developing the next PPV. Hart/Patriot is getting a great build-up. The Patriot has really gotten over with the WWF's fans very quickly. Even the DOA/NOD angle is shaping up, and Rocky Maivia's addition to the NOD, well ... it's no worse than what they were doing with him before. But every barrel has it's bad apple, and right now that would be the Godwinns vs., the LOD. Enough, already! Not to accuse the WWF of taking advantage of a legitimate injury, but the Stone Cold situation reminds me of Shawn Michaels at the end of 1995. Remember when he returned for the 1996 Royal Rumble? If and when Austin comes back, we could see a similar explosion in fan interest. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Bottom Line: Nitro won the ratings again. The hourly breakdowns seem to vary based on which news site you check out, but the averages look the same. Nitro earned a big 3.75, while RAW did an equally strong 2.95. RAW's weak link is their first hour, which has to go up against Nitro's second. RAW still did a 2.5 or 2.6 in the first hour, which is up from what they used to pull earlier this year from 8:00 to 9:00 (Eastern). Nitro did a flat 3.8 for both their hours this week, both of which are down from the megascores they pulled in last week. What will be interesting to see is what the final scores look like in a week or so. The overnight scores are always high, and go down a bit when all the figures are tallied and adjusted. Because the Nitro replay was moved up an hour, RAW went completely unopposed on the west coast, which isn't reflected in the overnight ratings. When the final numbers come in, RAW may not drop as much as Nitro does, meaning their scores could end up fairly close. RAW and Nitro were within a half ratings point of each other for their unopposed hours. Nitro got a much huger share, though, due to the increased number of viewers for the first two hours of prime time. Once again, the overnight totals show nearly ten percent of the cable TV viewers in the country were watching pro wrestling. Amazing given the state both promotions were in as little as two years ago. WCW is a regular in the top 10 or 15 cable shows of the week, usually at or near the top, while the WWF is now starting to show up again on the list as well. Both promotions are also regularly showing up on the list of top syndicated shows as well. House show business is exploding for both, while merchandising sales are going through the roof for the WWF (and not doing all that bad for WCW as well). Buyrates are looking good (though probably not as good as WCW'd like). This is the time of the year in which the wrestling promotions really need to build steam, since viewership always falls off during Monday Night Football season, and wrestling usually enters an overall slump during the fall and winter months. Both promotions look to be on track to build enough momentum to carry them into January, though WCW really needs to start turning some of their financial success into quality product. I personally think their main problem is that they have too many guys calling the shots, and too much of their talent letting their egos get in the way of the booking. The WWF's problem is injuries. Oh they've got ego problems too, but they've managed to deal with that by making angles out of them. Everything that the "smart" fan hates Shawn Michaels for has now become part of his in- ring persona and I, for one, am loving it. "Shawn won't job?" Of course not ... he admitted it on TV. Hah! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- This Week's Winner: RAW. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1997 by John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those of Internet Access, Inc. Volume One, Number 91 of the "Monday Night Recap", August 11th, 1997.