[RESULTS/OPINION] WCW Monday Nitro/WWF Monday Night RAW (9/16) WCW Monday Nitro: Live. HOUR ONE: Hosted by Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko & Mike Tenay. - Quick WCW Fall Brawl 1996 Results: * Diamond Dallas Page beat Chavo Guerrero via the Diamond Cutter. * Ice Train beat Scott "Flash" Norton via submission with a full nelson. * Konan beat Juventud Guerrera, retaining his Mexican Heavyweight Title. * Chris Benoit beat Chris Jericho via a suplex off the top rope. * Rey Mysterio Jr. beat Super Calo via Frankensteiner after bouncing off the top ropes of both rings. Misterio retains the Cruiserweight Title. * The Harlem Heat beat The Nasty Boys via interference by Sister Sherri to retain the World Tag Team Titles. * The Giant beat Randy "Macho Man" Savage via interference by Hogan, Nash and Hall. Nash knocked out Savage with a chair. Referee Nick Patrick did not notice the interference. * The New World Order beat Team WCW in the Wargames: Prior to the match Sting arrives and says he didn't join the NWO on Monday Nitro, that it was an imposter. Team WCW doesn't believe him. Match starts with Scott Hall (accompanied by Ted DiBiase) vs. Arn Anderson. Kevin Nash is the next to enter the cage. Lex Luger is next for WCW. Hogan is next, followed by Ric Flair. Then out comes Sting and the NWO have the advantage. Finally the REAL Sting comes out, attacks all four NWO members, grabs a mic and asks Luger if that was good enough, then leaves. The fake Sting puts Luger in the Scorpion Deathlock, while Hogan applies a headlock, forcing Luger to submit. Referee Nick Patrick calls for the bell over the protests of referee Randy Anderson. After the match Randy Savage calls Hulk Hogan into the ring. The NWO all beat up on Savage until Miss Elizabeth comes out and begs for them to stop. She shields Savage's body with her own. Hogan spraypaints "NWO" on her back. The NWO then clear out the announcers booth. Ted DiBiase lays out his plans for WCW as the PPV ends. * Note: Mean Gene Okerlund (rumored to be gone from WCW due to his contract expiring) only appeared in pretaped segments. Mike Tenay did all the live interviews. - Show starts with still photos from Fall Brawl. At the entrance of the arena we are show people in NWO t-shirts passing out more of the NWO leaflets. - REY MISTERIO JR. vs. JUVENTUD GUERRERA Another very good cruiserweight match, but one I had a hard time getting into. Not to fully dredge up my complaints about it last week, let me just once again say It's a little boring watching these matches that have nothing to them. Sure, they do great moves (and we see those same great moves over and over each week) but what else is there? What are Misterio's goals and aspirations here in the states? Since he won the title days after his arrival, what is his motivation to continue? We still know very little about him, much less all the other new guys they cram into the division week after week. I'm not asking for full blown angles here, just a little more depth in the presentation. Don't tell me how great Super Calo is, let him beat a few of the cruiserweight jobbers (such as Pat Tanaka) then have him lose on successive nights to Misterio and Konan, then say "there... there's your cruiserweight fix for the week." Highlights of the match: Guerrera springboards off the top rope and is met and stopped cold by a Misterio dropkick. Misterio nails a flying head scissors from the top rope to the floor. Guerrera does his springboard spinwheel kick. Guerrera moonsaults from the second rope to the floor. Guerrera (barely) lands a 450 degree splash from the top rope. Guerrera does a swirling huracarana from the top turnbuckle. Match ends with both going up to the top turnbuckle. Guerrera hauls Misterio up for a powerbomb, but Misterio holds on and rolls through it - flipping Guerrera over and off the top (in other words he reversed a powerbomb into a Frankensteiner - off the top turnbuckle.) It was a spectacular move (which unfortunately looked really bad in the slow-mo replay as you could see how much Guerrera "assisted" in the move.) Yup, this week's cruiser fix and I'm left wondering why it felt so hollow. Outside we see fans of the NWO celebrating their win in the Wargames. - Mike Tenay interviews Chris Benoit, Steve "Mongo" McMichael and Debra. They're going to pay back Lex Luger and Sting for letting the Horsemen down at Wargames. Glaringly obvious is the absence of Mean Gene Okerlund. - An extended promo for Glacier. Much of the footage we've already seen, this time with a voiceover commentary by Glacier himself. He lays out some load of crap story about travelling to the Orient and studying with a great martial arts master. (Hey Ray, first off... you don't just "go over" there and "train with an ancient master." It just doesn't work that way. Usually if you're not Japanese, then the Japanese won't train you. By the way, Kung Fu is Chinese, so you wouldn't have learned it in Japan, and the Chinese probably wouldn't teach you because you're not Chinese. And you simply are not going to find a master that will teach you a combination of styles as you said - not in the Orient anyway. You may have learned that crap stateside, and if you developed the right contacts - showed the proper aptitude and ability - then maybe - MAYBE - you might have worked with someone over there in a very nonformal fashion, perhaps as an observer at an exhibition or something. You do not just show up and say "here I am - train me" because you'd be laughed out of whatever dojo it was you blundered into.) And why exactly is he wearing armor? I can't recall off hand any martial arts disciplines that involve the wearing of armor, even for ceremonial purposes (except for kendo - the art of swordplay.) He said it was to "honor all the gladiators over the last few hundred years" (or something like that.) What gladiators? The Roman gladiators died out centuries ago. The only gladiators you see now are in video games and old movies. Does he think he's a Samurai? This would pretty much be the total antithesis of all his martial arts "backround." And why the mask? Is he a ninja - a martial arts philosophy and discipline the exact opposite of all the other hokum he's given us about himself? Let's face it: This is lame. This is silly. It's a cartoon character. It's a rip off of most fighting video game characters. It's only appeal is to kids under 10 and even THEY have to see how poorly he wrestles. This is a waste of my time, WCW. I hope you don't place any high priced advertising immediately after his matches 'cuz as soon as I see him I'm changing the channel. - DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE vs. ICETRAIN (w/ Teddy Long) At some point during this match (which offered very little to write about) they cut to the WCW "souvenir stand." A bunch of NWO kids (standing totally still and alert awaiting a cue that comes a second too late) go through the motions of forming a human barricade around the stand full of WCW merchandise. Some of them hold NWO placards that read "who wants this crap?" The WCW salesman is apparently chased away and they sell NWO t-shirts. Back to the match where Icetrain is, incredibly enough, winning. He gets Page in a submission hold. For some unknown reason Teddy Long jumps up onto the ring apron, which allows Page to grab the towel Long is carrying and in the clear view of referee Nick Patrick throw it into the ring. Patrick calls for the bell and awards the match to Page by forfeit. Page's push to nowhere continues. We actually miss the finish because they're busy showing us the NWO kids selling the t-shirts. Thank Gawd for instant replay... I guess. - The camera shows us the 1-2-3 Kid sitting in the front row. Tony Schiavone mentions this, and that he USED to be with the WWF, but has been released by them. They never say his real name (Sean Waltman.) - KONAN vs. SUPER CALO Oops, I might have given this away a bit earlier. Konan wins with a powerbomb. Is anyone else annoyed with his (Konan's) new persona? As Bobby "The Brain" Heenan might say, "It took Kevin Sullivan one day, what a lifetime of eating beans and picking lettuce couldn't do... make a Mexican out of him!" Ay dios mio! - Mike Tenay interviews Sean Waltman. He says he's been in Japan, and heard a lot about Nitro and decided to check it out. He wanted to be at Fall Brawl, but was on a plane and missed it. "Who won that big Wargames match?" He asks. "You know" says Tenay "it was the NWO!" "Aw... darn it!" Replies Waltman. His manner (and thus his new persona) is kinda slow and laid back. He speaks slowly and deliberately (probably so he won't get flustered and start cussing into the camera.) - HUGH MORRUS vs. BRAD ARMSTRONG Morrus has most of the match in his control. He eventually lands the moonsault and covers for the lazy pin. 1, 2, Armstrong hooks the arm and rolls Morrus' shoulders to the mat, 1, 2, 3. Armstrong wins, thus showing that in WCW, the natural laws of the universe no longer apply. HOUR TWO: Hosted by Eric Bischoff, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan & Mike Tenay. - Mike Tenay interviews Randy Savage. Outside we see the members of the NWO milling about their black limo. - RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE vs. SCOTT "FLASH" NORTON Not much of a match as Savage attacks Norton before the bell. A few moves in the ring, then it goes to the floor. Savage posts Norton, the hits him with a chair, DQ'ing himself. Savage throws Nick Patrick against the ring apron on his way out. Other referees arrive to raise Norton's hand in victory as Nick Patrick cries like a baby in the ring. - GLACIER vs. BIG BUBBA (w/ Jimmy Hart) (*click*) Looks like Buffalo should easily take care of Pittsburgh tonight. What is this, like Jim Kelly's 20th year in the league? Damn... commercial! (*click*) Glacier stands in his ring going through some piss-poor kata, wearing his rubber armor while facepaint and sweat obscures his vision. Big Bubba comes in and we get to see how small and unimpressive Glacier really looks (oh no... future cruiserweight? *Groan!*) Glacier uses a lot of kicks (odd considering neither traditional karate nor kung fu use many,) most of which miss or glance off Bubba's bulk. Bubba nails his belly-to- belly forward powerslam, then gives the crowd a few karate chops and "The Crane" from the 'Karate Kid' flicks. Hah! But then Glacier gets up lays in a superkick that makes Shawn Michaels' look like pure dynamite, and covers for the pin. Yay. The entire match was fought under blue light with a light dusting of fake snow falling from the roof. - Sting comes to the ring and gives a terrific speech, detailing how WCW has failed him, and how he's now a "free agent." He does the entire thing facing the fans, with his back to the camera. "I've been mediator and babysitter for Lex, sticking up for him a thousand times over the last twelve months." He tells Lex and all those who doubted him to "stick it!" - RIC FLAIR/ARN ANDERSON (w/ Woman) vs. MARCUS BAGWELL/CHRIS JERICHO Before the match, we see Miss Elizabeth refusing to come to the ring with Flair and Anderson. Woman tries to talk her into it, but no dice. Then we see some of the match. This guy hits that guy, that guy kicks the other guy, blah blah blah. Camera cuts to the former 1-2-3 Kid, who stands up, makes sure everyone in the arena sees him, then presses a switch on a hunk of machinery that Eric Bischoff identifies as a remote control (looked like an old 8mm camera to me.) Several (and I do mean several - almost 30 seconds) later a rain of NWO leaflets falls from various places about the arena. Fans carrying NWO placards walk past the camera. So and so clotheslines whatshisname. Cut to the outside where we see Waltman embraced in the arms of his NWO friends. The Giant presses play on a boom box and we hear Sting's pre- recorded voice saying whatever it was that we heard coming out of the black limo last week. (1 point for me as I nailed that sucker - if you'll recall.) The AntiSting says "trust me... trust me!" The revelry is doing well until The Giant tries a joke and says "When in doubt... NWO!" Either that was the signal to cut back to the ring, or no one understood him because everyone stopped partying. After a few seconds of ackward silence, they cut away. Back in the ring Bagwell gets a rake in the eyes from Woman. Staggering about, Arn nails the DDT. Flair steps up, does a little jig, then applies the figure four. Woman grabs his hands for support as the ref, missing all three instances of rulebreaking, counts a pin on the unconscious Bagwell. - CHRIS BENOIT/STEVE MCMICHAEL (w/ Debra) vs. LEX LUGER/STING Sting, we are told, has left the building. Luger battles fiercely against the overwhelming odds, gaining the upper hand and putting Benoit in the Torture Rack. In comes Flair and Arn and together the Four Horsemen lay into Luger. Luger wins via DQ. Again to the outside where the NWO plot to take over next Monday's Nitro. Hall grabs a camerman and drags him over to the limo. Inside, the NWO discuss next week's show. Waltman (from here on out to be referred to as "Six") says the Macho Man is his favorite, and could the Hulkster please get tickets? For you see, next week most of WCW is going to be in Japan, and the only major star left behind will be the Macho Man (all this according to Bischoff.) Show ends with a shot of what used to be Lex Luger lying in the ring. - Next week's main event: Not announced. Comments: What an anticlimactic way to introduce Waltman. He'll be called Six because he's the sixth member of the NWO. The cruiserweights had the match of the night, but Sting's speech stood above all the rest of the show. Mean Gene seems to be gone. He didn't appear tonight (and I don't think anyone even said his name.) I wouldn't rule out his returning as part of the New World Order though. It looks like the NWO will be taking over half of Nitro, as it was brought up that WCW will indeed abide by the conditions of the Wargames loss and grant airtime to them. WWF Monday Night RAW: Taped 8/19. - Hype for the IC title tournament. Will Diesel (actual picture show) and Razor Ramon (actual picture show) return to the WWF? What does Bret Hart have to say about Brian Pillman and Owen hart? - JAKE "THE SNAKE" ROBERTS vs. THE SULTAN (w/Bob Backlund & The Iron Sheik) Roberts chases Jerry "The King" Lawler away from his seat. Lawler returns and he, Kevin Kelly and Jim Ross are joined by Bob Backlund. The Sultan, who once tried to make a difference in the WWF, now looks a little like a fat Glacier. (Or would that be fat 2 - get it?) He wears a red outfit and a mask with a phony ponytail attached. He wins surprisingly quickly with a Camel Clutch. Bob Backlund stares at the applied manuever like Darth Vader watching the Emperor kill Luke Skywalker. Lest I forget, Lawler had thrown one of those airline travel sized bottles of booze in ring, distracting Roberts long enough for The Sultan to slap on the finishing hold. - Brian Pillman again asserts that Bret Hart will be at next Sunday's "Mind Games" to reconcile with Owen Hart. Owen agrees. Steve Austin pops in to say he better be there, and that he (Austin) is the "Best There Is!" - THE SMOKING GUNNS (w/ Sunny) vs. BOB HOLLY/ALEX PORTEAU Sunny (perhaps a supporter of camping out because tents sprout up all over the place as she walks by) grabs the mic and says some stuff (I didn't catch any of it because she wouldn't stop bouncing.) Then a big picture of herself drops down, suspended from the lights. The match starts. Out comes Jim Cornette, Owen Hart and the British Bulldog. They grabs seats to watch the match at ringside. The Gunns dominate (though Holly occasionally shows signs of adequacy.) Suddenly Owen jumps up on the ring apron. He's holding a cup of water and he either throws it at one of the Gunns, or it is slapped by that Gunns. In any case, Bob Holly rolls him up for the upset pin. There must be a full moon out - Brad Armstrong and Bob Holly win matches on the same night? - Gorilla Monsoon ("live" from the WWF studios) has prepared a statement. Prior to this, Jim Ross had stated that without a doubt, Razor Ramon and Diesel will appear on next week's RAW. Monsoon says this is a surprise to him as he is aware of no such plans for them to appear. He mentions Scott Hall and Kevin Nash by name and states that they are under contract with another organization. He apologizes, and hopes that none of the fans feel misled, and says he will stick around to monitor whatever else Jim Ross says. Ross sticks by his story, stating that perhaps not everything that goes on in the WWF passes across Monsoon's desk. - Jim Cornette comes to the ring to do a workout. He is accompanied by Vader, and will perform a few moves against jobber Tony Williams. As you might guess, every time he does a move, Williams slips out and reverses it, causing Cornette to shriek in pain. Cornette puts him in a headlock, but Williams slips out and applies an armbar. Cornette reaches the ropes and Jerry Lawler (who has the mic) tells Williams that he's not following the rules. Williams then puts Cornette in a headlock, snaps him over to the canvas, then grabs Cornette's foot and twists. Over comes Vader, who lays in a short forearm shot. Cornette ties Williams in the ropes and slaps him, saying this is how he'll handle that 127 year old Jose Lethario. - "WILDMAN" MARC MERO (w/ Sable) vs. OWEN HART Former IC champion Pat Patterson joins the crew for commentary. Patterson will be the special referee for the match on next week's RAW to crown the new champion. This was a decent match, though a step down from both men's best. End comes when Owen pulls off his cast and knocks out Mero. Owen covers for the pin, but Mero kicks out, then nails Owen with the cast. The ref, who could hardly have missed it, counts the three and the win for Mero. During the match things get rather heated between Jim Ross and Monsoon. Ross sticks by his sources and again guarantees Diesel and Razor will be on RAW next week. Monsoon demands that he stop saying that, that he's had no meetings which suggest that fact. Pat Patterson points out that even though he's been named the referee for the IC title match, that he himself has had no meeting with Monsoon to confirm it, suggesting that indeed not everything that goes on in the WWF involves Monsoon. This is definitely getting interesting! Monsoon again says Nash and Hall's real names. - Clips from the "South African Xpress Tour." Bret Hart calls Pillman and his brother Owen liars - that he's made no commitment to appear at "Mind Games," and that his contract with the WWF ended with his appearance in South Africa. He says he has yet to make up his mind regarding his future. - FAAROOQ ASAD (w/ Sunny) vs. SID A surprisingly entertaining match. Both guys exchange crowd "ooh"-ing power moves. Then it slows down to the usual rest holds, so they run comments from Ahmed Johnson. While Sunny distracts the ref, Faarooq grabs a chair and nails Sid. He covers for the pin, but Sid kicks out. Sid then grabs the chair, smacks Faarooq, and is DQ'ed. It'll be Faarooq vs. Mero next week live on RAW to crown the new IC champ. - Comments from the Undertaker, who vows that Goldust will be the first to feel his wrath, and that "Mind Games" will be the debut of the "new" Undertaker. - Comments from Paul Bearer and Mankind. Mankind asks the question "If I win the belt, will I become a Sexyboy? Will the girls kiss me and blow in my ear?" (What's left of it anyway.) He then engages in a little autoerotic asphyxiation, choking himself with a leather strap. "When I win, it'll be a nice day... " Sick man, real sick! - Next week's main event: Mero vs. Faarooq - winner new Intercontinental Champion. Pat Patterson special referee. Comments: I'm kinda sick of mulling over the whole Diesel/Razor thing, so I'll just be content to wait and tune in next week. Overall, an amusing show. Bottom line: Reaction seems to be about 2 to 1 on the negative side regarding Fall Brawl. Some praised the cruiserweight matches, and a few were entertained by the main event, but many seem to dislike what the storyline did to the traditional Wargames match. When you consider very little happened (other than revealing the fake Sting - something many people had already figured out - and the surprise-just-for-the-sake-of-surprise Liz turn) all you really had left was a fairly weak undercard, and the trashing of what used to be a pretty good gimmick match. The commitment of resolving the Sting angle meant having to save Waltman's debut until tonight and they did absolutely nothing to put him over. I doubt most fans were even aware he was there, much less who he was. They should maybe dump the fake Sting (though he is kinda fun to have around.) The Giant sticks out of the group like a sore thumb. We now have 3/5 of The Clique in WCW, and they have at best only a smidge of the pull they used to have. "Mind Games" COULD be incredible. The WWF should be poised to pull out all the stops to appease the hardcore Philly crowd. This is actually the first In Your House I'm interested in seeing. they've also set the stage for quite a RAW next week as well. This week's winner: Aw shucks, let's say RAW. Let the crumpled up NWO propaganda fly! JRP