[RESULTS/OPINION]Monday Night RAW/Monday Nitro (3/25)


Monday Night RAW: Taped 3/11.

 - "Graphic nature" advisory. Opening sequence. Shawn enters ring.

 - SHAWN MICHAELS (w/ Jose Lethario) vs. LEIF CASSIDY
   Shawn comes to the ring with the "KLIQ CAM" (*ugh*) and tapes the adoring
   crowd. He then locks up with Leif and the two proceed to have a fairly
   decent match. Bret Hart comes to ringside about a minute in, chasing
   Jerry Lawler off ("I left my lights on McMahon!") Hart gives color
   commentary as the two in the ring trade high impact moves. They do one
   of those segments where they trade pin attempts back and forth by 
   reversing each other's cover tries. Marty Jannetty comes to ringside at
   some point. Leif nails Shawn with a suplex off the top rope (bringing a
   smile to Bret Hart's face, as it's one of his moves.) This was one of
   Leif/Shinobi/Avatar/Al Snow's better matches thus far. Leif then gets
   a second try at the suplex reversed by Shawn. Jannetty then Shawn as he
   bounces off the ropes, then grabs him by the waist and pulls him over to
   the corner, holding him for Leif to work over. Bret, not liking this,
   goes over and pushes Jannetty aside. Shawn nails Leif with the Superkick
   and covers for the pin. Shawn then goes out to confront Marty, pushing
   Hart asidse as he does. Hart takes offense and the two begin to argue.
   Jose Lethario steps in to calm the two down. This was all well played out
   and a nice final setup for WrestleMania. Jannetty's tripping Shawn was
   one of those things that could get you to mark out if you weren't careful.

 - HUNTER HEARST HELMSLY vs. ALDO MONTOYA
   HHH has yet another blonde with him (missed her name.) Aldo is made to
   look pretty good in this one - battling back a few times and even having
   the upper hand for a bit. HHH cuts it short, though, with a well applied
   Pedigree. Curious that they'd let Aldo get so much offense in, unless the
   intent was to really sell the Pedigree as a devastating stopper.

 - Goldust on the backlot. Letterboxed for the true afficianado, Goldust
   shows us a mannequin dressed as Roddy Piper. An "edited for television"
   advisory is shown, and seems to come into play once as Goldust begins to
   explore south of the dummy's equator. After molesting the mannequin for
   a suitable length of time, Goldust then demolishes it - slamming it 
   against a metal barrier. Kinky.

 - McMahon interviews the Undertaker and Paul Bearer in the ring. They hate
   Diesel. Nuff said.

 - Dok Hendrix is show singing "Badstreet, U.SA." I kid you not.

 - More clips of Shawn and Bret. Pretty much the same as the last two weeks.
   Still good, I'm just sick of seeing them.

 - OWEN HART (w/ Jim Cornette) vs. AHMED JOHNSON
   There's no point into going in too much detail, as it degenerates into
   the usual six man brawl. Bulldog's the first one out, then Vader, then
   Yokozuna and Jake Roberts. Ahmed wins by DQ.

 - Bret Hart music video. An okay batch of Hart clips shown to the tune of
   a pretty generic Tom Petty-esque song.

 - Next week's main event: Debut of Mankind!

Comments: An okay show with a weak ending.


Monday Nitro: Live.

 - RANDY SAVAGE vs. THE BELFAST BRUISER
   Fair match. The Bruiser isn't much more than a brawler, but he and Savage
   give it a good effort. Savage wins with the Flying Elbowdrop.

 - Mean Gene interviews Ric Flair, Woman, and Liz. Classic Flair, which to
   me has become something totally despicable as of late. He sings, he
   spazzes, he gropes the gals (just don't let 'em drive Champ!) Woman strokes
   the belt as Liz carries half of the Macho Man's fortune - which looks to
   be about 50 bucks in one dollar bills.

 - KONNAN vs. MR. J.L.
   I've finally given up on waiting for Konnan to excite me. He did some
   okay moves which would have been done better by a smaller, lighter man.
   Konnan wins with a bridging pin thingy. He's by no means bad, just
   boring. Bischoff mentions that Psicosis, Liger, and Benoit have already
   advanced in the Cruiserweight tournament. I don't know if we'll ever see
   those matches, or if they were indeed "on paper."

 - THE BOOTY MAN vs. DISCO INFERNO
   Kimberly is now the Booty Babe, and looks ridiculous. Booty wins with the
   High Knee bump. At one point, Booty Man hangs his ass out the ropes, and
   the Booty Babe spanks it. Three words: "Run Johnny, run!"

 - LEX LUGER/STING vs. THE AMERICAN MALES (American Males... American Males... )
   Hey, an okay match! Luger was fired up, and really works over Marcus
   Baghead. Sting actually saves Bagwell once as Luger's about to slam him
   into the ringside barrier. Bagwell returns the favor at the end of the
   match when Sting has Riggs covered for the pin and Marcus has the option
   of making the save, but does not. Sting and Luger squabble like a married
   couple.

 - RIC FLAIR (w/ Woman & Liz) vs. THE GIANT
   Flair and the Gals come to the ring, tossing Macho Man's one dollar bills
   to the crowd. Svage tries to attack, but is held back by security.
   Here's the play-by-play:
   
   Giant dominates Flair. Woman hands Flair some wire. Flair chokes Giant.
   Giant comes back. Giant misses a splash from the top rope. Giant comes
   back. Giant chokeslams Flair. Girls enter ring. Arn Anderson and Kevin
   Sullivan enter ring. Arn whacks Giant with chair. Sullivan takes the 
   chair from Arn. Giant turns and thinks Sullivan hit him. Giant chokeslams
   Sullivan. Arn laughs. Giant chokeslams Arn. Ref call for bell, declaring
   a "no contest." Giant leaves. Show ends.

 - Next week's main event: Arn/Sullivan vs. Booty Man/Hulk Hogan.

Comments: No Hulk Hogan whatsoever! Yippe-ki-yay-motherfu...


Bottom line: Both shows probably got killed by the Academy Awards. Expect
Nitro to be the clear winner in the ratings, since it was a post-PPV show.
Speaking of which, they barely mentioned Uncensored, and didn't show as
much as a still picture or even an artist's rendition of what happened.

This week's winner: Nitro, by the narrowest of margins. Namely - no Hogan.