[RESULTS/OPINION]Monday Night RAW/Monday Nitro (1/22) Monday Night RAW: Live. - Uh-oh. It's Sunny again! Playing pool in a red slip. This time, not only are we shown the discretion advisory, but Sunny reads it for us! - Quick recap of the Rumble: Jarrett waffled Ahmed Johnson with his guitar and was DQ'ed: The Smoking Gunns pinned the Bodydonnas as Sunny showed us her ass-ets: Duke "The Dumpster" Droese won the "Free For All" match when Hunter Hearst Helmseley got DQ'ed for using brass knucks. Hunter was the first entrant into the Rumble and lasted 50 minutes: Goldust debuted his new manager, Marlena, and beat Razor Ramon for the IC title (with a little help from the 1-2-3 Kid:) Shawn Michaels won the Royal Rumble - eliminating Yokozuna and Diesel among others: Vader kickes some ass, and is managed by Jim Cornette: The Undertaker won the main event by DQ when Diesel pulled the referee out of the ring following a Tomb- stone Piledriver and pin cover by the Undertaker: On tap for In Your House VI - Bret Hart vs. Diesel in a cage: The Undertaker says it'll be a cold day in Hell before Diesel wears the belt again: Now, on to RAW... - VADER (w/ Jim Cornette) vs. SAVIO VEGA Vader annihilates Vega. Squashes him with his bouncing splash from the second rope (the Vaderbomb.) After pinfall, Vaderbombs him again - then headbutts the ref - then powerbombs a second ref! Gorilla Monsoon enters ring and tells him he's indefinitely suspended. Vader does not approve and grabs Monsoon. The Hall of Famer lands a few stiff chops (which looked cooler than all Hell!) to a surprised Vader. Cornette pleads for Vader to leave the ring, but the man from the Rocky Mountains would hear none of it! Vader grabs Monsoon, slams him, then Vaderbombs him. Vince McMahon is almost tearful on the mic, yelling "I've known Gorilla Monsoon all my life! You can't do that to him!" Shawn and Razor storm the ring to make the save as Vader trudges off to the lockerroom, his WWF career apparently over. After the break, the incident is shown again on replay. Monsoon is stretchered out of the ring. Vader is shown demolishing his dressling room. Mcmahon says Vader's stint in the WWF "... only 24 hours old, is over!" - RAZOR RAMON vs. HUNTER HEARST HELMSELEY Helseley is accompanies by a busty model named Shai Mark. (Though the closed captioning on my TV occasionally spelled it "Shane Marks.") An okay, but short match as Ramon is counted out following an appearance by the 1-2-3 Kid carrying a giant baby bottle. (He and DiBiase had been shown commenting that Ramon is a "crybaby." They had a giant bottle and diapers and apparently plan on making Ramon wear them. All this courtesy Jim Cornette, no doubt.) - "Billionaire Ted's Wrasslin' Warroom: The Final Episode." (God, I hope so.) Ted asks his gang to give him one original idea. Scheme Gene says he has one - but it's too sensitive to say there - they'll all have to call his hotline! Everyone pulls out cellular phones and starts dialing. - Vince McMahon interviews Shawn Michaels in the ring. Michaels calls all his fans "The Clique" (as somewhere Meltzer looks up and says "whuzzat?") Shawn says he want's Owen Hart in a match. Cornette arrives to do Owen's negotiating. Shawn says he'll give anything for a match with Owen. Jim asks about that WrestleMania Title match? Shawn says sure - then tosses Cornette over the top rope. Michaels vs. Owen Hart: Coming soon to an In Your House near you! - BRET "HITMAN" HART vs. GOLDUST (w/ Marlena) Marlena (shouldn't it be Marlene?) is Goldust's cigar carrying "director" and real life wife, Alexandra York (Runnels?) Goldust has a new less skintight, gold foil suit which he debuted the night before at the Rumble. There's not too much to say about this match. Mostly rest holds. USA took three commercial breaks in the span of 10 minutes. Also Razor Ramon showed up about halfway through and slugged Goldust out by the jumbo screens. Hart wins the match with the Sharpshooter, giving Goldust his first loss. With neither title on the line, Goldust submitted quickly. - Next week's main event: Diesel vs. The British Bulldog, and Shawn Michaels vs. Yokozuna. Comments: Yow! This was a great show. Again, while the wrestling was okay at best, the angles are hot. Gorilla doing the stretcher job makes Vader as big a heel as there is in the WWF. I doubt he's gone for good. I suspect Monsoon while allow him to stay so that he can get revenge by throwing as many faces at him as he can. Billionaire Ted has overstayed it's welcome. Ramon, who looks to be locked into yet another program with the Kid, will apparently be playing this one for the sheer comedy. Hart had some very harsh comments regarding Diesel in their upcoming cage match. "I'm deadly in cages!" He also promised the Undertaker a rematch. Gorilla Monsoon laid in some serious chops on Vader's chest. Vader's reaction was perfect: Some- where between shock and a no-sell. Nothing like the WWF to make you mark out an hour a week! Monday Nitro: Live. - As the gang does their usual blathering, Konnan arrives flashing his "Mexican Title." - RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE vs. RIC FLAIR Savage is preceded to the ring by several women... and Woman! Hogan stops Savage halfway to issue a challenge in case he wins. Flair is alone. This match was a much better effort by both than their previous few, though it was a bit short and Flair horribly fluubed his "Flop" maneuver. (He barely had enough momentum to flip over the turnbuckle, then flopped to his butt on the ring apron.) Bischoff announces he's learned what Hogan and Savage's secret weapon is: Miss Elizabeth! End comes when Flair has Savage against the ropes and Arn Anderson arrives with his trusty International Object. Savage ducks and Flair's lights go out. Hogan arrives to fend off Anderson as Savage covers for the pin and gets the three count. NEW WORLD CHAMPION! (Though there is a bit of confusion. The referee clearly sees Arn hitting Flair. He raises his arm, apparently to signal for the match to go on, but the bell rings. Everyone ignores it though, and the ref still counts the three. Whatever. The bell keeper must have thought the ref raising his arm was the signal to ring the bell. As I said, everyone ignored it, including Bischoff and Heenan. Oh yeah, Bischoff also mentions that the Road Warriors will reuinite at the Clash. Zoiks! Hogan celebrates like a goon. Savage calls for his music to stop. Savage then tells Hogan he's making a fool of himself. He wants a title shot? Talk to Bockwinkle - become the #1 contender. They shake, and agree to get it on sometime in the near future, there at Caesar's Palace. - "FLYIN'" BRIAN PILLMAN vs. DEAN MALENKO This was a really good match, with several excellent moves by both wrestlers. Pillman hits his swinging DDT off the second rope. Malenko hits an awesome fireman's carry into a gutbuster. (Pillman is carried on Malenko's shoulders, thrown into the air, and lands stomach first onto Malenko's knee.) Good psychology to the match as Pillman gets frustrated with Malenko's numerous reversals and overall technical skill. Pillman gets the pin when Malenko's foot gets trapped between two ropes and he can't kick out of Pillman's cover attempt. - STING/LEX LUGER vs. HARLEM HEAT The Heat are without Sister Sherri, who is preparing for her wedding to Col. Parker on the Clash. Sting and Luger come to the ring several yards apart. Sting takes the brunt of the damage in the match. Luger has trouble fending off the teamwork of the heat. Sting gets Stevie Ray into the Scorpion, but Booker T. nails him from behind with his leaping guillotine leg smash (or whatever it's called.) Sting tumbles out of the ring as Jimmy Hart appears at ringside and hands something to Luger. Luger nails one of the heat - silver dollars fly everywhere - and the ref counts the three count. NEW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!! Sting is confused when handed the belt, but soon is jubilant that they won (he missed the pinfall from his vantage point on the floor.) - HULK HOGAN vs. THE ONE MAN GANG Oh my God the Gang sucks! This match couldn't only have been worse if it had been Kamala in the ring (though Hogan actually looked a but energized and worked a little.) Bodyslam - legdrop - Hogan wins. Dungeon of Doom and the Horsemen run in. Hogan clears them all out, with a little help from Savage. Another Savage/Hogan interview. They'll take care of Flair and the Giant at the Clash, then settle the score between themselves. - Next week's main event: Not sure if they mentioned one. Comments: This too was a very good show. Excellent wrestling, and several surprises. Two major titles changed. Not bad for free. Bottom line: This is what wrestling - live wrestling - should be about. This was probably the best head to head night yet. I watched RAW almost uninterrupted, then did the same for the Nitro replay. Two excellent shows. This week's winner: I'm not gonna call one. Both shows were too good to lower by mere comparison. Let's just say they were both mutually entertaining and leave it at that! Run down for the Clash of the Champions: - Hogan/Savage vs. Flair/The Giant - Sting/Luger vs. The Bluebloods - The Public Enemy vs. The Nasty Boys - Konnan vs. Psicosis - Eddy Guerrero vs. Dean Malenko (Is this one still on?) - Col. Parker/Sherri wedding - Return of Elizabeth - Return of the Road Warriors Why was Woman at Nitro? Hmm...