Slobberknocker Central Monday Night Recap #117 February 9th, 1998 WCW Monday Nitro: Live/Taped: Live. Length: Three Hours. Location: El Paso, Texas. HOUR ONE Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Mike Tenay. - The show starts with the usual look back at the end of last week's show. - "Hollywood" Hogan and Eric Bischoff immediately make their way to the ring. After the usual blathering on about nothing in particular, Hogan announces that the NWO is going to take Randy Savage and drag him to the ring, where Hogan will give him the wrestling lesson of his life. Savage appears in the crowd and accepts the "challenge", saying that after he embarrasses Hogan he'll take over his shot for the title against Sting at SuperBrawl. - Nitro Girls. Larry Zbyszko is absent from the announcing booth. Schiavone doesn't know where he is. - STEVE "MONGO" MCMICHAEL vs. GLACIER Before the match they show clips of Mongo's recent scuffles with Davey Boy Smith. Glacier still has his elaborate entrance, which draws absolutely no reaction from the crowd. As the match starts Louie Spicolli shows up wearing a shirt like Larry Zbyszko often wears, carrying what he purports to be Zbyszko's luggage. Spicolli says he's a good friend of Larry's and that he can't find him and is worried about him. He will end up sticking around for a good chunk of the show, offering running commentary of a generic heel nature for this and the next several matches. I guess this is WCW's way of trying to get him over as a major mid-level heel. A protracted splash, with Mongo taking his sweet-ass time in earning the easy win (pinning him with a Tombstone Piledriver). Glacier's mortal enemy Mortis runs in to make the save after the pinfall, but Mongo fights him and James Vandenberg off. Mongo then plays up to the El Paso crowd over the house mic, throwing out a warning to Davey Boy Smith. - Spicolli tries to offer his explanation as to why he's now Zbyszko's best friend, but just comes off sounding like a whiny fat guy instead. - KONAN (w/ Vincent) vs. NORMAN SMILEY Norman Smiley. Norman Smiley? NORMAN SMILEY!? This has to be the worst matchup ever in the history of Monday Night wrestling! I haven't watched enough of WCW's weekend shows lately to see if this Smiley is a regular or not. For those who haven't seen him before, he's a scrawny jobber who wears yellow trunks and booties. He's clearly a green rookie, yet he looks like he's in his mid-to-late-30's maybe. His sparse offense is comprised mostly of basic wrestling holds straight out of a Power Plant training session. His one highlight is a suplex with a bridge which results in a two count. They tease a few upset near pins, with Konan eventually just dropping the guy on his head and applying the Tequila Sunrise submission for the win. I'll give Smiley this: at times he looked like a technically proficient jobber. The problem is his total lack of charisma and ring presence made showing this match on Nitro inexcusable. This made Kane vs. the Hardy Boys look like a PPV main event. - Mike Tenay interviews some guy about racing cars. WCW will be sponsoring another racer this year. Insert your own redneck joke here. - Nitro Girls. - Nick Patrick is in the ring. James J. Dillon comes out and tells him to get out of the ring. Patrick argues that he was never officially suspended by WCW. He drops a few "shoot" style comments regarding his tenure with WCW. He threatens to file a lawsuit against Dillon. J.J. still kicks him out of the ring. Security escorts Patrick out of the ringside area. This angle is going nowhere slow. - YUJI NAGATA (w/ Sonny Onoo) vs. DISCO INFERNO This is the battle of "guyswhowerepushedlikecrazythreemonthsagobutnow- couldn'tbuyawin-exceptwhentheywrestleeachother". Disco wins this yawner with the Stone Cold Stunner. La Parka then runs in and nails Disco with a chair. Nagata takes a look at him, then turns his back to let La Parka nail him as well. La Parka does, then performs a little dance on the chair in the middle of the ring. Ah, there's nothing like good booking ... ... and this is NOTHING like good booking. - They run a promo for the upcoming Randy Savage/Lex Luger match at SuperBrawl. Tenay then interviews Luger. Their match at the PPV will be no DQ. Hasn't Luger handily beaten Savage in recent months? I can't even remember-the feud has been so meaningless. HOUR TWO Hosted By: Tony Schiavone and Mike Tenay. - EDDIE GUERRERO/CHRIS JERICHO vs. DEAN MALENKO/CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. Good match, with Eddie getting a major face reaction from his hometown crowd. Jericho puts Chavo away with the Lion Tamer after Eddie pushes Chavo off the top turnbuckle. - A video package recapping the problems between the Steiners is shown. - JUVENTUD GUERRERA vs. EL DANDY Guerrera wins fairly easily with the 450 Splash. After the match Chris Jericho comes out for a sneak attack, but Guerrera fights him off. Jericho starts to badmouth Guerrera, but Juventud-in Spanish-challenges him to a "Mask vs. Title" match at SuperBrawl. Jericho provides the translation, laced with smart-ass commentary. - Bill Goldberg is again featured in a flashy video package. - STEVEN REGAL vs. BILL GOLDBERG Bobby Heenan shows up to join the announcing crew. Longer match than the usual Goldberg squash. Regal starts off working stiff, with Goldberg not selling any of it (and looking either legitimately pissed or "fired up"). Regal follows this with a string of attempted mat wrestling maneuvers, holds and such, but Goldberg just doesn't seem to want to cooperate (with the end result being the two grunt a lot, but pretty much just stand in place doing nothing). This was either an okay wrestling match, a near shoot with Goldberg refusing to cooperate, or a planned approximation of the more Japanese "strong style" type of match. They flub a few moves, though they do connect on one in which Goldberg reverses a hold into a head scissors. Regal often resorts to stiff punches to the head and knees to the body when he's unable to get Goldberg into a certain position. Goldberg eventually winds up on the ropes, looking weary as Regal is really working him over. Suddenly it's as if a switch is thrown and Goldberg hits his spear takedown. The Jackhammer follows and Goldberg gets the pin. Weird match. I honestly don't know what I saw. On the surface you had a match where most of the time the two weren't doing anything, pretty much just locked into restholds. Yet at times it looked as if Regal couldn't get Goldberg to cooperate, so he went stiff on him. In some respects it looked like a UFC type fight: boring, but brutally real. On the other hand, it may have just been that Goldberg didn't know how to do what it was that Regal wanted to do. Or didn't want to do it. Or maybe that's just what they wanted us to think. Regal initiated most of the offense, so either Goldberg has a better grasp of counterwrestling fundamentals than he's previously shown, or this was just a bad match which looked "real" because of Regal's style and Goldberg's inability to smoothly transition from move to move. It was still a relatively short match, so Goldberg's stamina again wasn't tested. I'm just not sure how to call this one. - Nitro Girls. Nitro Party Video. - LOUIE SPICOLLI vs. CHRIS ADAMS Raven shows up during this one. The match is only barely started when Spicolli takes Zbyszko's haliburton briefcase and knocks out Adams, earning a DQ. Zbyszko then appears. After Spicolli runs away Larry explains that someone switched his limo driver and he was dumped off in the middle of nowhere. - A video package featuring Booker T. is shown. - ULTIMO DRAGON vs. SATURN Saturn comes up with a reversal for the Dragon Sleeper, small packaging the Dragon and earning a somewhat surprising upset win. HOUR THREE Hosted By: Schiavone, Tenay and Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. - Recap of the Benoit/DDP match on Thunder. - RAVEN vs. BOOKER T. No match. First they take a commercial break. Then, with the match still having not started, Raven orders his Flock to attack Booker as a lesson for taking Saturn's TV Title. Booker fights back a bit, wrestles Raven for a minute, then gets beat up some more when the others come back in. Raven taunts him as Saturn applies the Rings of Saturn. - "HOLLYWOOD" HOGAN (w/ Eric Bischoff) vs. RANDY SAVAGE (w/ Elizabeth) Savage dominates early, attacking him down on the floor before the bell can ring. Hogan fights back with his usual assortment of dirty tricks (chokes, rake to the eyes and so forth). They move to the floor after a bit, where Hogan-after a failed double axhandle off the top by Savage, tries to hit him with a chair. Elizabeth pulls the chair away from Hogan. As he confronts her over it Savage nails him from behind, driving him into the post. Savage hits Hogan with the chair, tosses him back in and lands an elbow off the top. He covers and just about has the sure pinfall when Buff Bagwell pulls the referee out of the ring. The other NWO members, meanwhile, run in and attack Savage. After a gang beating they hold Savage up for Hogan to whack in the head with a chair (which he does). They leave him laying in the ring, though he recovers and jumps Hogan from behind in the aisle just as they cut away to a commercial. After the commercial Lex Luger walks to the ring. He challenges Savage to come out and face him. Elizabeth comes to the ring and distracts Luger long enough for Savage to attack him from behind. Seconds later Sting runs in and attacks Savage. Hogan and the NWO come back out as well, but they don't try to help Savage. After a moment of pointing and jawjacking a huge net drops from the ceiling, trapping Sting and Luger (as well as Savage) beneath it. All three are pummeled silly as they go to a commercial. - Nitro Girls. - More clips of the Steiners are shown. - THE STEINER BROTHERS (w/ Ted DiBiase) vs. THE OUTSIDERS Hall and Nash survey the crowd, killing a ton of time on the mic. A commercial is taken before the Steiners come out. Not much of a match. Scott refuses to tag Rick in. Nash does little besides his kneelift and teasing the Jackknife, which he doesn't perform. Scott, who's supposed to be "overwhelmed" by the double teaming of the Outsiders, offers hardly any offense and just lets himself get beat up for the majority of the match. The end comes when Hall yanks Scott into the corner Rick is in. Rick makes the tag unbeknownst to either Hall or Scott. Then, as Hall is just about to put Scott away with the Outsider's Edge, Rick comes off the top turnbuckle, planting Hall with a Bulldog. Rick pops Nash before he can get in, drops on Hall and covers for the three count. New World Tag Team Champions! At first Scott is upset that he wasn't the one that got the win. He eventually embraces his brother and the two celebrate their victory as the show ends. - This Thursday: Nothing announced. - Next week: Nothing announced. Comments: Surprised? You shouldn't have been. Word had actually spread across the Internet Monday morning that the Steiners had been taped over the weekend with the Tag Title belts for footage to be aired this coming Saturday. Most took this either as a clear sign that they would win the straps on Nitro, or that it was an elaborate scheme on WCW's part to trick the Internet fans into expecting the title switch, only to surprise them with a Steiners split (as was heavily teased throughout the show). Not a great show, but solid enough for me to give the win this week. The first hour was just plain miserable. The second was much better. The third, frankly, had a whole lot of filler and time killer which made it hard to watch. Still, it was just momentous (and goofy) enough for me to give it the nod this week. Of course this is only possible because of a relatively weak RAW this week. How weak? Read on ... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- WWF RAW is WAR: Live/Taped: Taped 2/3. Length: Two Hours. Location: Evansville, Indiana. WWF RAW Hosted By: Jim Ross, Michael Cole and Kevin Kelly. - A serene look at an unnamed city street at night fades into Sunny, dressed as Marilyn Monroe, singing "Happy Birthday" to one "Classy" Freddie Blassie, who turns 80 years old this week. The WWF can be pretty weird sometimes. Of course a steam vent blows "Marilyn's" dress up. Joe DiMaggio is nowhere to be seen. - Clips of Shawn Michaels violating Steve Austin's personal space last week are shown. This immediately sets up- *KEE-RASH!* Austin heads to the ring carrying a sack and a microphone. Austin says Michaels did a no-no last week. Ass-this, ass-that ... you get the idea. DeGeneration X pops up on the Titan-Tron and Shawn Michaels tells Austin that he only does what he wants when he wants. Austin challenges him to come out because he has his belt. Michaels laughs this off and grabs for his suede bag which he keeps his title belt in and pulls out a foam rubber replica. Shawn sputters as Austin dumps the real belt from the pillowcase he'd brought with him to the ring. With an eventual confrontation between the two now assured, we move on to the first match. - Sunny comes to the ring to announce the competitors for the match. Her dress, by the way, is tighter than a suntan. Awoooo! - LEGION OF DOOM vs. BARRY WINDHAM/JEFF JARRETT (w/ Jim Cornette) The NWA team is again accompanied by the Rock & Roll Express. Windham is now every bit as big as Dusty Rhodes was in 1983 (sizewise, that is- except that Windham doesn't have that big splotchy bulge on his side like Dusty had). The usual. Animal wrestle most of the match, with Hawk tagging in late, doing two or three moves then ending up on the floor to be attacked by Cornette and the Express. They work over his knee. Tossed back in the ring, Jarrett slaps on the Figure Four. Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw runs in, sending Windham and Jarrett scurrying. Bradshaw takes out both members of the Express, allowing Windham to escape. For some reason Kelly talked about the Road Warriors "losing a step" and how the talk in the lockerroom was that people no longer feared them. I smell a heel turn coming. - They show D-X footage of the group plotting to track down Steve Austin in the building. Michaels puts Chyna in charge of this task. - THE GODWINNS vs. THE QUEBECERS They show footage from Shotgun involving these two teams. Apparently they are feuding. First I've heard of it. Apparently they will fight at this weekend's PPV. First I've heard of it. This match is as exciting as a garbage truck backing down an alley. (An apt comparison, I feel, as it sounded about the same ... and I imagine smelled about the same as well.) After dueling slop bucket shots to the head the Godwinns get the tainted win. Canadian morale is dealt another blow. Rumors of the Godwinns holding McMahon's grandchildren hostage again resurface. - Chyna is in the back seeking out recruits to help her track down Steve Austin. For some reason Los Boricuas just happen to be there. Apparently they felt like driving to Indiana to an arena where they weren't scheduled to wrestle so that they could play a rousing game of dominoes. In a surprising development it turns out Chyna can speak Spanish (better than English, actually). She offers them money to help her find Austin. They agree. You know, Chyna is starting to turn me on, (mostly because of the boob job, though). - TAKA MICHINOKU/AGUILA vs. PANTERA/BRIAN CHRISTOPHER Clips from Shotgun set this one up. Pantera, who will face Taka at the PPV, had been his partner in a match last week against Christopher and Scott Taylor. Pantera turned on Taka, allowing Christopher to get the pin on Taka. A few good moves aside this still came off as a pale imitation of WCW's Cruiserweight division. Aguila did a sweet corkscrew vault over the ropes (during the course of a now familiar "pile-up" spot on the floor). From that point to a commercial break little happened. Soon after they returned Christopher pulls a foreign object out of his tights. Taka suplexes him, knocking the object out of his hand. Pantera then runs in, grabs the object, STUFFS IT IN HIS MASK, and proceeds to deliver a flying headbutt to Taka, which knocks him out. I first saw this done in a match about ten or twelve years ago. It made no sense then, and it still makes no sense now. Why would Taka be knocked out, but not Pantera? Does Pantera have an impermeable shield in the forehead of his mask which dissipates the force of the blow? Shouldn't he himself have suffered a laceration and caved-in skull? And what is it with those tights he's wearing, anyway? Man, he looks like Steve Lombardi dressed as Tiger Mask for Halloween! Anyway, Christopher covers for the pin. This is all supposed to generate heat for the Taka/Pantera match at the PPV. SUPPOSED TO, I say. - The lights go out. Kane and Paul Bearer make their way to the ring. Bearer says Kane's gonna snuff Vader out. Kane holds a clock with Vader's picture on it. It catches fire. Shouldn't they have done this last week? This actually lowered my enthusiasm for their upcoming match (which was pretty low to begin with). Bearer says the Undertaker is gone from the WWF, meaning he'll probably show up at this Sunday's PPV. WWF WAR ZONE Hosted By: Jim Ross and Jerry "the King" Lawler. - KEN SHAMROCK/CHAINZ (w/ the DOA) vs. ROCKY MAIVIA/FAAROOQ (w/ the NOD) This match is to hype the PPV match between Shamrock, the DOA, Ahmed Johnson and the Nation of Domination. First I've heard of it. Nice of them to announce the match six days before the PPV. The Rock gives us his opinion of cloning. The majority of this match is fairly unremarkable, though it was okay (I'm just tired of the whole DOA/NOD thing). Things wind down when the usual melee breaks out among those at ringside. Shamrock, meanwhile, has laid Faarooq out with a belly-to-belly suplex. He slaps on the ankle submission, forcing Faarooq to tap out. Rocky enters the ring with a chair and delivers the most horrifically brutal shot to the face that I've seen in months. Shamrock, sporting a small cut on the bridge of his nose, goes berserk after Faarooq gets the pin. Both the referee and Chainz are suplexed by Shamrock before his other pals can calm him down. - They show highlights from the WrestleMania press conference. I believe this was the same as the clips package shown on Live Wire (and maybe Superstars as well) over the weekend. If you hadn't heard, Tyson will be the special "enforcer" referee outside the ring in the Austin/Michaels title match at WrestleMania. Anticlimactic, yes, but we all knew this is what it would be weeks ago. If you believed anything else it's because the WWF worked you. Deal with it. HOWEVER, with seven weeks to go until WrestleMania (as well as what could happen after it), don't assume anything at this point. - Chyna and Los Boricuas search the back for Austin. Chyna even checks out the men's shower-startling a jobber wearing only a towel. - RECON (w/ Sniper) vs. STEVE BLACKMAN Blackman does his little karate thing with the glow-in-the-dark sticks. The whole boring match is overshadowed by the Jackyl, who delivers a lengthy sermon at a pulpit lowered from the ceiling. He rattles on during the entire damn match. This really sucked. It was a bad idea. The crowd boos continually, chanting "shut up!" after a few minutes. Blackman, by the way, wins the match with a submission hold. Afterwards the Jackyl chews Recon out and slaps him on the face. Jim Ross hypes the WWF hotline on the way to the break. Perhaps in light of the recent Ric Flair rumors, Ross teases a story involving a former NWA champion who may be in negotiations with Cornette about coming to the WWF to join the NWA. I'm guessing the story is really about Sid, but I could be wrong. - Road Dog and Billy Gunn come out on the stage to joke about what they did to Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie last week. This leads to them "recreating" the incident by pushing another dumpster off the stage. This time Cactus and Charlie dummies are inside. Some of this was really funny, but the crowd, having just been bored to death by the Jackyl, didn't react all that well to it. - Chyna and her guys are still looking for Austin. They split up, with Los Boricuas heading off through a pair of fire doors in search of Austin. Stone Cold suddenly appears and wraps a chain around the door handles, locking the Boricuas out ... or in ... or something. Chyna shows up moments later after Austin has disappeared. Unable to open the doors she storms off. Wow ... that didn't amount to anything, did it? - GOLDUST (w/ Marc Mero, Sable & Luna) vs. THRASHER (w/ Mosh) Make that "MarilynMansonDust" again. Mero makes Sable go to the back, pissing off the crowd. Goldust and Mero will face the Head Bangers at the PPV. First I've heard of it. Nothing match, with plenty of interference by Mero and Luna-including Luna tripping Thrasher as he bounces off the ropes. Sable then comes out for no reason and yells at Luna. Goldust comes over to yell at Sable. She slaps his face, stunning him long enough for Thrasher to roll him up from behind and get the pin. After the match Sable also smacks Luna. I really hope there's a point to all of this-aside from a Sable/Luna match. That's NOT the way to jump-start Mero and Goldust's careers. Heading to the break they show Michaels, Chyna and Hunter Hearst Helmsley wending their ways through the back halls: presumably making their way to the ring. - D-X hits the ring. Shawn does his bit to hype the match and his feud with Austin, calling him out. A quick *KEE-RASH!* and Austin comes out with the belt, chasing D-X from the ring. The New Age Outlaws come out as well and quickly the odds are against Austin ... ... until the roar of the chainsaw is heard. Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie pop up through the ring. Owen Hart, meanwhile, runs in from out of nowhere. After a staredown and brief scuffle the show ends with D-X and the NAO leaving up the ramp as Austin and his motley assortment of teammates stand in the ring. - Next week: RAW isn't on. Comments: Boy, they didn't give us much reason to watch, did they? Shamrock, Maivia and the LOD were the biggest names in action. Kane appeared but did nothing. Austin and Michaels, while doing well to set up the tag match this weekend, didn't do anything we haven't seen before. Most of the matches set up matches at the PPV: most of which either hadn't previously been announced, or had only recently been and were woefully underhyped. Ironically this week was one of the strongest in weeks in terms of actual wrestling quality. Still, it couldn't cover up the fact that it was pretty much a throwaway show to hype the upcoming PPV. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Bottom Line: This upcoming PPV clearly shows why there are just too damned many of them. This show simply doesn't mean anything. The matches may be good, but it all pales in comparison to the implications of WrestleMania. As good as the main event may be, the WWF would be better served to wait and build up to Austin vs. Michaels and Cactus/Chainsaw vs. the Outlaws at WM. Besides, with Austin, Michaels and Helmsley all less than 100% healthwise, the WWF is really gambling with WM's future in this. Kane's match with Vader is pretty much just a vehicle by which the Undertaker will make his return to lay the groundwork for his match with Kane at WM. There's also rumor of Vader possibly being scheduled for eye surgery in the coming days, leading to speculation that Kane will "injure" him in this match. Kane may not get an outright win over Vader, but there's no way he'll lose it (other than by DQ, maybe). The storyline really overshadows the match in this one: not too hard to do since Kane has to still look indestructible for his eventual match with the Undertaker. The rest of the card is merely filler. Michinoku vs. Pantera has some potential to be a great match, but the possibility of involvement by Brian Christopher and a screwy ending diminishes that potential. The other matches really mean very little: especially the Godwinns vs. the Quebecers. It's cookie cutter feud making. WCW isn't doing all that much better in hyping SuperBrawl. We all get the fact that Hogan will be fighting Sting. Savage/Luger has been announced, but there no longer seems to be any point for it and one has to wonder it it'll still happen. The rest of the card looks like it'll be announced at pretty much the last moment, filled with matches involving wrestlers who have had a lot of recent airtime. A few other matches have already been announced, but they're based on feuds that didn't exist as little as a week ago. Benoit vs. Page, Guerrera vs. Jericho, etc. I'm assuming Mongo will face Davey Boy, as well as Booker T. vs. Saturn. Zbyszko vs. Spicolli is probably a safe guess. They're actually doing a bit better job of setting some of these up (unlike the Luger/Savage feud, or the Luger/Bagwell feud at the end of last year). The problem is that so many of these matches will have been seen on Nitro, Thunder, or either of the last two PPV's. Zbyszko/Spicolli-if it happens, might well be the only original match on the card. Anything involving the Steiners has already happened in recent weeks. Overall the PPV looks like one big Nitro: the success of which hinges on how well the matches come off and what WCW does in the way of surprises. Something should finally be resolved in the Savage storyline, as well as the Steiners situation. Once they get all this out of the way they can finally move on to something new. I'm going to be really pissed if this PPV comes and goes and all these angles continue to be dragged out. The WWF needs to get this inconsequential PPV out of the way so they can crank the preparations for WrestleMania into high gear. So far they've only announced one match officially. Their task is made even harder than it normally would be by the fact that RAW isn't on next Monday. Once again it will be preempted by the USA Network's yearly coverage of the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. RAW *will* air a week from this Saturday, on the 21st, at 8:00 PM Eastern, in a show which will actually be taped next Monday night. The RAW two nights later on the 23rd will have been taped on the 17th. Only two more RAW's left this month and both are taped. I believe they return live on March 2nd, going back to a live/taped/live/taped cycle leading up to WrestleMania. The next "big" RAW will be the show on March 16th-assuming it's live, as it should be highlighted by a Tyson appearance. WCW, to counter this, is expected to put up a major match every week, involving the likes of Hogan, Sting, Savage, Nash, etc. If you liked the end of Nitro this week, get used to it: you'll be seeing a lot of the same over the next two months. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- This Week's Winner: Nitro. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Slobberknocker Central" and "Monday Night Recap" are copyright 1998 by John Petrie, and all opinions expressed therein are his own, and not those of "Internet Access, Inc". Check the "Slobberknocker Central" main page for info on how to receive the "Recap" free via E-Mail every week. Volume One, Number 117 of the "Monday Night Recap", February 9th, 1998.