[RESULTS/OPINION] WWF Monday Night RAW/WCW Monday Nitro (4/7)

WWF Monday Night RAW: Taped 4/6.
HOUR ONE: Hosted by Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and the Honky Tonk Man.

 - Show kicks off with a voiceover by Mankind, promising a present for the
   Undertaker tonight. They show his throwing fire at the Undertaker from
   last week. The opener then plays and dammit ... they've changed the
   music! Probably complaints from parents about the use of the Marilyn
   Manson tune. The footage is the same, just new, generic heavy metal
   music.

   Sycho Sid, it would appear, has yet to arrive at the arena. They'll keep
   us informed.

 - OWEN HART/BRITISH BULLDOG vs. THE GODWINNS
   Owen gets on the house mic and tells the crowd how thankful he is to his
   big brother Bret for reuniting the family. He also warns that Shawn
   Michaels, when he comes out later in the show, better not say anything
   bad about Bret. The Bulldog agrees, and any sign of dissention between
   the two has vanished. Jim Ross refers to the duo, and Bret, as the "Hart
   Foundation", which would seem to indicate that they will indeed use that
   name. Also the Honky Tonk Man still has his guitar ... sort of. He's
   placed all the pieces in a bag, which is tied off around the neck of the
   guitar, so it retains a general guitarish shape. He says he's got a big
   surprise scheduled for later in the show.

   The match itself wasn't all that bad. There was actually some good early
   tags, double teams, etc. We then go to split-screen where Shawn reminds
   us that he doesn't respond well to threats, authority, knee therapy, etc.
   Phinneas, back in the ring, is being double teamed by the champs, who
   pretty much have things in hand. The ref misses the tag and tries to
   force Henry Godwinn back out of the ring. Henry, unable to stand the
   pounding his cousin is receiving, attacks the Bulldog (which gets a
   decent response from the crowd).

   The Legion of Doom pop up split-screen and remind us how badly their are
   going to pummel Owen and the Bulldog. The finish in the ring then comes
   when Henry has finally made it into the ring and gets a cover attempt on
   the Bulldog. The ref is occupied with Phinneas. Owen comes off the top
   and nails Henry, then covers for the pin. Pretty standard stuff here.

   The Legion of Doom then come out and confront Owen and the Bulldog on the
   ramp, blocking their exit. Henry and Phinneas meanwhile come up from
   behind and prepare to slop the Bulldog. Davy Boy and Owen duck, and the
   Road Warriors get the brunt of the goo. This prompts a brawl between
   those two teams as Owen and the Bulldog stand at the top of the rampway,
   laughing. Following a commercial break Owen and Davy Boy tell us how
   funny that was, and ask to see the replay a couple of times. This bit
   ends with words being exchanged by them and Steve Austin, who happened to
   be walking by. Numerous officials stand between the three to prevent any
   scrappin'.

 - "STONE COLD" STEVE AUSTIN vs. BILLY GUNN
   Gunn is accompanied to the ring by the Honky Tonk Man, who then retakes
   his seat at the table.

   Austin gets the early offense, and the crowd (at least those at ringside)
   are really responsive. Owen and the Bulldog pop up split-screen to
   complain about Austin sticking his nose in their business. Austin,
   meanwhile, has his hands full with Billy. Things get really heated as
   Gunn is able to counter some of Austin's stuff. This infuriates "Stone
   "Cold, and he drops Billy to the canvas, then flips him off (with both
   middle fingers, which are electronically,scrambled). The ref pushes him
   off and Austin flips off the ref behind his back (again, scrambled). This
   draws a great response from the crowd. He starts to clips the ropes, but
   Billy scrambles over and hits him low. Austin drops, scrambling his eggs.
   At some point Billy flips Austin off. Austin whips Billy into the corner
   and follows, but meets a big boot. He comes out and Austin catches him
   with a kick to the gut, then the Stone Cold Stunner. Austin gets the pin.
   A nice, short, heated match which really got some of the crowd into it.

   The Honky Tonk Man then enters the ring and makes the same offer to Billy
   that he made to Jesse Jammes last week. Like Jammes, Billy turns Honky
   down with a shot to the jaw. Honky slinks back to his seat, vowing this
   isn't over yet.

 - In what was hands down one of the worst segments on RAW in quite some
   time, the show is interrupted by a figure on the ramp. He identifies
   himself as the Commandante, the commanding officer of the Truth
   Commission from South Africa. He says he and his commandoes are in
   America to study the affects of democracy, and how they have been
   corrupted by crime. He calls us "sissy, liberal Americans". This was
   pretty much a lengthy set up to show a brief clip of Bret Hart being well
   recieved in South Africa (carrying their flag as he went to the ring).
   Brief comments from Hart are played as well, taking shots at Steve Austin,
   Shawn Michaels and Sycho Sid. The Commandante announces that next week's
   RAW will feature footage from the WWF's tour in Johannesburg. McMahon
   later adds that we'll also see footage from Kuwait City. The segment ends
   with a shot of Bret Hart on the cover of the WWF Magazine along with Bart
   Simpson, hyping Bret's appearance on that show (well, his voice anyway),
   later this month. Shawn is shown in the back and he reminds Bret that
   "The Simpsons" is just a cartoon, and not indivative of the average
   American family.

   I've read that the "Truth Commission" is an angle that has been running
   in the USWA. Gawd, how I wish it would have stayed there!

 - Shawn comes out for his interview with McMahon in the ring. In a rather
   lengthy discourse, he explains how Bret's real motives behind his return,
   in addition to his obsession with the WWF Title, have been money.
   Everything bad that's happened to the Hart clan has been because Bret has
   allowed it to happen for the right price. It was Bret who has constantly
   involved his family in everything. He relates how the two have been
   jockeying for position at the top of the WWF for the last six years.
   Shawn hints that he gladly let Hart get all the build up back then, and
   when it came to Shawn's turn, Hart only did so "kicking and screaming!".
   He calls Bret's claims that he "had to" come back "horses#!t!" (which
   gets bleeped). Shawn reveals that Bret used a "rival oragnization" (WCW)
   to get more money out his comeback, presumably threatening to go to this
   other organization if Vince didn't pony up enough money. (The assertion
   here is that Bret never had any intention of going elsewhere, but he used
   that threat to satiate his greed). Shawn goes on to say that Bret's "time
   off" was him merely watching to see if the WWF with Shawn Michaels at the
   helm would fall flat on it's face. Shawn says they didn't and, to the
   contrary, the WWF did better business than they have in years. "You run
   the company. Isn't that correct?" (Regarding the business claim). Vince
   nods agreement. The segment ends with Shawn saying that, though it would
   anger Bret, Shawn was going to do a little dance and take his clothes
   off.

   This brings out Owen and the Bulldog. Shawn slips out of the ring and
   grabs a chair, then holds the two off until they decide against
   attacking. Shawn does a handstand on the chair as the two depart.

   This was a pretty good speech. At times some of what he was saying drew
   boo's from Hart fans, which he just incorporated into his speech, saying
   the fans can boo and cheer who they wish-something Bret Hart is against.
   Many of his comments were aimed at the "smart" fans, which gave the whole
   thing a shoot quality at times. My only complaint was that he went too
   long (with a lot of shouts of "boring!") before he was done.

HOUR TWO: Hosted by Vince McMahon, Jim Ross and the Honky Tonk Man.

 - They kick off the second hour by recapping the first.

 - THE HEADBANGERS vs. FREDDY JOE FLOYD/BARRY HOROWITZ
   Squash. They run comments from Vernon White, who is Ken Shamrock's
   exhibition opponent later in the show. McMahon mentions he was trained at
   the "Lion's Den", whatever that is. White says an exhibition is just a
   fight, and he's going to make the most of his time in the spotlight.

   The Headbangers win with their powerbomb/legdrop off the top combo. (I
   think they pinned Floyd).

 - KEN SHAMROCK vs. VERNON WHITE
   McMahon actually hypes the next Ultimate Fighting Championship PPV, which
   will be on May 30th. He even briefly defends the UFC, saying a lot of
   people don't understand what it's all about. He then goes on to describe
   the competition it presents, the variety of styles, then rattles off
   several of the martial arts disciplines involved. McMahon, at times, is
   the God of Professional Wrestling. (I wonder if this was the payoff for
   using some of their Shamrock footage last week?).

   The bout starts looking very much like a UFC contest. They start off down
   on the mat, trading holds, escapes, and so forth. Shamrock, surprised a
   bit by White's agility and ability to escape, is forced into the ropes.
   The referee calls for a clean break. White then lays in a stiff kick to
   Shamrock's face while Ken is still down. Shamrock gets up and drives
   White to the mat, laying in a series of blows to the face. Something
   somewhere starts to gush blood and the ref stops the exhibition. Shamrock
   gets the "win", and both Ross and McMahon criticize White for getting out
   of hand, saying that he deserved the treatment he received at the hands
   of Shamrock. Jim Ross interviews Ken and he echoes that same sentiment-
   that Vernon took the fight too far and Ken had to teach him a lesson.

   Before the interview can get any farther, Vader comes out. Paul Bearer
   and the referees hold him back as he trades insults with Shamrock.
   Apparently Vader wasn't too impressed, and he feels he can take anything
   Shamrock could dish out.

   This wasn't too bad. Vince has done an excellent job of bringing the UFC
   into the world of professional wrestling, yet stressing that they are two
   separate worlds. On the subject of the blood, I'll only say there was a
   lot of it very fast.

 - VADER (w/ Paul Bearer) vs. FRANK STILLETO
   Squash. Vader lands a Vaderbomb then finishes him off with the powerbomb.

 - President Gorilla Monsoon announces that Sycho Sid still hasn't shown up
   for his match with Mankind. After perusing the roster, the only suitable
   opponent would be Steve Austin. Austin steps up and says not a chance,
   that he'd already wrestled his match that he signed for. "I don't care if
   they're out there holding 'Austrin 3:16' signs, I'm not going to save
   your damn little show!". He then reconsiders, and agrees to the match if
   Monsoon will give him the match at In Your House vs. Bret that Sid was
   supposed to receive. Monsoon agrees. Austin says "ass" several times,
   which all get bleeped.

 - Mankind comes out for a lengthy interview of his own. He drops a great
   deal of the Mankin persona and mentions some of his personal life
   (telling the fans that if they can't take reality, they should "turn the
   TV off" and "watch another wrestling show"). He mentions his wife and
   daughter. The best quote of the speech:

   "When my three year old girl says 'keep me safe daddy ... keep me safe!'
   I look into her beautiful little eyes and I say 'I can't do that, because
   daddy's on the road three-hundred days of the year, working on his
   seventeenth concussion! Being spit on by vile scum in Undertaker t-shirts
   ... wrestling main events for half the money that pumped-up pretty boys
   make in the opening match'!".

   He says after his next match (which he admits "may be my last!") the
   Undertaker will be nothing but a "random pile of body parts!". Paul
   Bearer then pulls another Mankind mask out of a sack. Mankind says he and
   the Undertaker will look alike when it's all done.

   The lights flicker and the "spirit" of the Undertaker is felt. Old
   footage of him plays on the giant screen as the Undertaker's voice tells
   him ... I dunno ... I had lost interest by this point. Whatever it is the
   Undertaker usually says. I'm sure "rest in peace" was in there somewhere.

 - "STONE COLD" STEVE AUSTIN vs. MANKIND (w/ Paul Bearer)
   The match quickly starts as a brawl on the floor. Austin suplexes Mankind
   on the ramp. We are shown Owen and the Bulldog watching from then back.
   They complain about Austin getting the match with Hart at IYH. McMahon
   asks if Bret was "screwed" again?

   The match, meanwhile, is roaming all over the ringside area. Mankind is
   slammed against the rail. Austin gets plowed into a table. The Bulldog
   and Owen have, by now, come out into the crowd.

   After a commercial break they show Mankind pasting Autin with a chair.
   They then enter the ring for a period and Mankind applies a choke. Austin
   escapes it by getting up, then dropping-driving Mankind's jaw into
   Austin's head). The match spills back to ringside where Mankind pulls
   back the floor pads, lays Austin on the layer of pads underneath, and
   drops an elbow off the apron. He then drags Austin up the ramp and sets
   up a piledriver. Austin shoves him off the ramp and Mankind takes a nasty
   bump against the rail, smashing butt-first onto the floor. They make it
   back to the ring.

   Owen and the Bulldog finally decide to come to ringside. Moments later
   the Legion of Doom come out and chase the two around the ring, taking up
   a position opposite them. Before either of these two teams can do
   anything, though, Vader and Paul Bearer come out. Vader enters the ring
   and moves in to hit Austin. Austin moves aside and Mankind takes the hit.
   The ref calls for the bell. Mankind and Vader come to blows for several
   moments, then are parted by Bearer, who begs for level heads to prevail.
   The two stare down for a few seconds, then embrace (as the crowd boo's).
   Austin gets the win via DQ and the show ends.

 - Next week's main event: The Legion of Doom vs. the Godwinns (?). High-
   lights from South Africa and Kuwait.

Comments: Not too bad a show considerring most of the WWF's stars were
overseas. There was some decent wrestling, but no single match stood out in
it's entirety as being great. The Austin/Gunn match was fun to watch. The
Shamrock squash was effective. He and vader could work a good match given
Vader's backround in Japan.

I'm a little bugged by what they did with Sid. This show was taped, yet
they still hyped a main event that they knew wouldn't take place. The plus
side of it was that it was at least a plausible angle, and the replacement
match was better than Mankind/Sid would ever have been. It still bugs me
though.

Suddenly this next In Your House has the makings of a big show. The main
event promises to be a violent escalation of a feud that has already
delivered some decent matches. Hart vs. Austin should be good, but most
likely short and angle-ridden, with a screwy ending (to preserve a later,
bigger rematch). The LOD/Owen/Bulldog match should at least be watchable, if
the Warriors don't just phone it in. (I do fear, though, that we may see a
Godwinn run-in, continuing the feud between those two teams).

The Honky Tonk Man angle needs to be resolved quickly, or else the fans will
lose what little interest they still have.

I don't know how well the "Truth Commission" is being received in the USWA,
(if that is indeed where it came from), but for my money it's just plain
silly, and I hope it was a one-time deal.

I'm still bummed by the music change in the intro.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 - Quick WCW Spring Stampede results (4/6/97):
  * Rey Mysterio Jr. defeated the Ultimate Dragon, pinning him with the
    springboard huracanrana roll-up.
  * Lee Marshall tried to interview Kevin Nash. An altercation broke out
    between Nash and Scott Steiner. Security chief Doug Dellinger sprayed
    pepper spray in the eyes of Steiner to subdue him. Steiner was
    handcuffed and escorted away by security.
  * Akira Hokuto defeated Madusa to retain the Women's World Heavyweight
    Title. Luna Vachon interfered, hitting Madusa's knee from behind while
    she was attempting to powerbomb Akira. Hokuto covered for the pin.
  * Prince Iaukea defeated Lord Steven Regal to retain the World Television
    Title. Regal brutalized Iaukea after the surprise upset.
  * Mean Gene Okerlund interviewed Ric Flair. Flair announced that he would
    make his return to the ring at Slamboree, May 18th. He also announced
    that Carolina Panther Kevin Greene has been released to wrestle in WCW,
    and Greene has agreed to appear with Flair at Slamboree.
  * Public Enemy defeated Steve McMichael and Jeff Jarrett. Rocco Rock got
    the Haliburton briefcase away from Debra McMichael and knocked out
    Jarrett, then covered for the pin.
  * Mean Gene interviewed Harlem Heat and Sister Sherri.
  * Dean Malenko defeated Chris Benoit by DQ to retain the United States
    Heavyweight Title. Jimmy Hart and Miss Jacquelyn attacked Woman outside
    the ring. Eddie Guerrero came out (with his arm in a sling) to help
    Woman. Arn Anderson and Kevin Sullivan also came out. Sullivan knocked
    out Benoit with a mop handle. Malenko wins via disqualification.
  * Kevin Nash defeated Rick Steiner to retain the World Tag Team Titles.
    Scott Hall never appeared, and Scott Steiner missed the match due to his
    earlier altercation. During the match Nash got into an argument with Ted
    DiBiase and Nick Patrick.
  * Mean Gene interviewed Lex Luger and the Giant.
  * Lex Luger and the Giant defeated Harlem Heat in the Four Corners Match.
    The Giant had the match won, but Tagged in Luger to get the win with the
    Torture Rack. Luger will get a future title shot against "Hollywood"
    Hulk Hogan.
  * Mean Gene interviewed Diamond Dallas Page and Kimberly.
  * Diamond Dallas Page defeated Randy "Macho Man" Savage in a No-
    Disqualification Match. The match went out into the crowd and around the
    arena. Numerous foreign objects were used. Referee Mark Curtis was
    knocked out. Page hit Savage with the Diamond Cutter. Nick Patrick came
    in to referee and was left with no choice but to make the three count.
    The rest of the New World Order came out and argued amongst themselves,
    splitting into two distinct groups. Nash powerbombed Nick Patrick. Eric
    Bischoff prevented Savage from attacking Kimberly, then Kevin Nash
    stopped Savage from going after Bischoff. The PPV ended without Sting
    putting in an appearance.
  * (NOTE: Regal, Benoit and Woman were apparently in a car accident this
    weekend. All three were okay enough to appear on the card).


WCW Monday Nitro: Live.
HOUR ONE: Hosted by Tony Schiavone & Larry Zbyszko.

 - They start off with footage of Savage manhandling Kimberly, Bischoff's
   attempts to stop him, Eric getting shoved down, and the rest of the NWO
   coming in to break them up. After the opening they show still photos from
   the Savage/Diamond Dallas Page match.

 - KONAN/HUGH MORRUS vs. ALEX WRIGHT/PSYCHOSIS
   Pretty much a squash. Psychosis wrestles most of the match on his side.
   Only a couple of highspots: a corkscrew plancha off the top to the floor
   being the biggest. Alex is tagged in for a brief flurry, but he ends up a
   victim to Hugh Morrus' moonsault.

   During the match they show us DDP arriving at the arena (footage from
   before the show started). He's got all kinds of bumps and bruises, and
   his shoulder is in some kind of sling.

   After the match they show stills from the Madusa/Akira Hokuto match.

 - LORD STEVEN REGAL vs. REY MYSTERIO JR.
   A less than stellar effort this time out, particularly on Mysterio's
   behalf. He trise his huracanrana roll-up, but Regal escapes.

   The match is then more-or-less interrupted as they cut away to
   "Hollywood" Hogan, Bischoff, and Ted DiBiase arriving via limo. Hogan
   mutters some Godfather type stuff about getting the "family" back the way
   it should be.

   Regal hits a reverse suplex. He then applies the Regal Stretch. He has
   the match won, but he refuses to release the hold. The ref calls for the
   bell, DQ'ing him. Prince Iaukea runs in for the save and Regal slaps the
   Regal Stretch on him too. Regal stomps on both unconscious cruiserweights
   as several refs try to remove him from the ring.

   The rest of the NWO arrive. Nash gripes to the cameraman about them
   following him everywhere. They go to break showing stills from the Regal/
   Iaukea match at Spring Stampede.

 - They show stills of the altercation between Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash,
   and Scott's subsequent arrest. They also have a few shots from the Nash/
   Rick Steiner match.

 - CHRIS BENOIT (w/ Woman) vs. ICETRAIN (w/ Teddy Long)
   The match is virtually ignored as they cut to a shot of the two NWO camps
   squaring off in the back. Hogan drops the World Title belt, saying it
   means nothing without unity. He asks Nash if he has a problem with him.
   Savage and Bischoff get in each others face. As some of the NWO members
   each have their say, Nash can be seen stalking off from the back of the
   group.

   Benoit and Icetrain, meanwhile, are doing their best to kill a few
   minutes. Teddy Long is up on the apron and gets knocked down, landing
   like he may actually have taken a shot to the head. Benoit DDT's Icetrain
   and gets the pin.

 - They run a clip of Hogan with Dennis Rodman at the premiere in Chicago of
   his new movie, "Double Team" with Jean Claude Van Damme. Some fans do a
   spontaneously rehearsed "NWO" chant. Rodman then does a terrible, brief
   interview, hyping his arrival in the NWO, set for July 13th (scheduled by
   WCW as "Summer Stampede", but it may be the Great American Bash. The
   "Bash" was the original name, but WCW is advertising it by the "Summer"
   name on their website). For the record, "Double Team" opened miserably
   in 5th place over the weekend, pulling in only about 5 million dollars.
   As a rule of thumb, a movie usually only makes between two and five times
   what it earned on it's opening weekend. It will most likely have to go
   overseas (where Van Damme does well) to make any money.

 - KEVIN SULLIVAN (w/ Jacquelyn & Jimmy Hart) vs. HECTOR GUERRERO
   Man, Eddie sure looks bad! Wait ... that his older, haggard looking
   brother, Hector. Hector does the job, letting Jacquelyn beat up on him,
   then succumbing to the "Tree of Woe" and Sullivan's stomp to the belly.
   Before the match they showed stills from the Benoit/Malenko match, and
   Eddie being "kidnapped" by the Dungeon of Doom. They also mention (later)
   that they had taken Malenko's U.S. Title belt, but it was later returned
   to Dean by WCW officials. Tony asks the pertinent question "where's
   Eddie?" as his brother Hector is being tossed around by Jacquelyn.

   They go to commercial showing still from the Public Enemy/Horsemen match.

 - The New World Order comes out in two groups: Hogan, DiBiase, Bischoff,
   NWO Sting, Vincent, and Scott Norton in the first ... Nash, Syxx,
   Bagwell, and Wallstreet in the second. Savage and Elizabeth (Savage on
   crutches) bring up the rear.

   Once in the ring Hogan essentially replays the little scene they did in
   the back. He tosses down the belt. He asks Nash if there's a problem? He
   asks where Scott hall is? Nash replies that he has no problem with Dennis
   Rodman, and that he and Syxx were all alone last week and that contibuted
   to his bitterness. Hogan suggests that next year Nash will be part of the
   NWO Easter Egg hunt, which doesn't go down well with Nash. Nash then says
   that Hall is "NWO 4 Life", and that no one need worry about him. He
   finishes by saying that his going around hyping the NWO isn't just a
   catch phrase, and that he's committed to the team. Hogan says perhaps
   they ought to get it on right there, teasing a fight. The crowd starts to
   go wild as the other NWO members make room for the two. Nash reaffirms
   that he's "NWO 4 Life", and a fight is avoided (much to the chagrin of
   the paying audience).

   Attention then turns to Savage and Bischoff. Time running short, they
   quickly agree to put each other on "probation", and leave it at that.

   Nick Patrick was nowhere to be seen. Schiavone speculated he might be in
   the hospital following Nash's jacknife.

HOUR TWO: Hosted by Tony Schiavone, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan and Mike Tenay.

 - Mean Gene Okerlund interviews Ric Flair. Flair brings out "Rowdy" Roddy
   Piper. After some crass jokes about the girl they had in the ring last
   week, they agree that Kevin Greene would be a worthy addition to their
   team. Greene pops up from nowhere, calls Piper "the Freakin' I.C.O.N.",
   and all three go into a spastic fit. Greene drops in place (like 'dem
   football players do). Piper hops about, and Flair does his alzheimer's
   jig. Wait a minute ... didn't Greene hate Flair when we last saw him?

   DEAN MALENKO vs. CHRIS JERICHO
   An unusual match. It starts of and maintains a really fast pace until
   Jericho gets whacked in the nose. I didn't see any blood, but the
   announcers, wrestlers, and referee all act like Jericho is bleeding.
   Jericho holds his hand over his nose and mouth. Malenko points to
   Jericho, as if to indicate to the ref that he's injured. Malenko bends
   over to take a look, then lays in a kick to Jericho's head and covers for
   the quick pin. The ref helps Jericho out of the ring, but the camera
   never gets a clear shot of whether he's bleeding or not. Weird. Too short
   to say much either way about it.

 - PUBLIC ENEMY vs. HIGH VOLTAGE
   Let's jump ahead to the ugly part, shall we? Grunge places Chaos on the 
   table and dives, but Chaos moves and Grunge goes through the table. Rage
   then hits Rocco with a Northern Lights Suplex and covers for the pin.
   Rock and Grunge then are interviewed by Okerlund and demand a
   "Philadelphia Street Fight" rematch next week on Nitro (which just
   happens to be from Philadelphia. Wow ... what a co-inky-dink!). Rocco
   says it's time to get "extreme".

 - A shot of Prince Iaukea in the back getting his ribs taped. The poor bum
   still has to wrestle Ultimo Dragon tonight. I begin to contemplate the
   changes that will be necessary for my "Current Titleholders" gallery.

 - HARLEM HEAT (w/ Sherri) vs. JEFF JARRETT/STEVE MCMICHAEL (w/ Debra)
   McMichael doesn't come to the ring with Jarrett. Jarret wrestles the
   whole match, and does all he can to keep from being pinned. Mongo finally
   comes out, tags in, and cleans house. He then tags the near unconscious
   Jarrett back in and tells him to finish up. Jarret goes back in and gets
   laid out by a high kick from Booker T. The Heat get the win. Mean Gene
   then interviews the Horsemen. Jarrett asks Mongo where he was. Debra
   starts to talk and Mongo silences her. He then goes on to say that it's
   time WCW wrestlers started to keep their eyes on Mongo, because he'll
   get his due. Jarrett says that doesn't answer his question and they go to
   break.

 - Lee Marshall phones in from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

 - ULTIMO DRAGON (w/ Sonny Onoo) vs. PRINCE IAUKEA
   The long dark night is over, as Ultimo quickly takes advantage of the
   ribs and pins Iaukea to become the new World Television Champion.

   They go to break showing still from the Luger/Giant/Harlem Heat match.

 - THE GIANT vs. SCOTT STEINER
   No match. The Giant comes out first, then Scott, who's jumped from behind
   by Konan and Hugh Morrus. Yet another Nitro main event doesn't take
   place, and no replacement is scheduled. They go to break with stills from
   Nash vs. Rick Steiner.

 - Diamond Dallas Page comes out wearing an icepack on his shoulder. He
   tells of how he learned about Savage's attack on Kimberly (he was
   unconscious at the time) and how the feud between he and Savage has just
   begun. He calls Savage out. Savage comes out limping halfway to the ring.
   "Hollywood" Hogan catches up to him and says "this one is on me!". Before
   he can enter the ring, though, Sting drops from the ceiling with a pair
   of baseball bats. He tosses one to Page and the two of them hold off the
   NWO as the show ends.

 - Next week's main event: None announced.

Comments: Though there was again absolutely no quality wrestling, the show
seemed more exciting and event filled. All the angles, I guess. I actually
enjoyed this one, especially since it pointed out just how poor Spring
Stampede was. Here are my thoughts on Spring Stampede, match-by-match:

 - Mysterio vs. Ultimo: This was one of the matches that held the most
   promise, but I don't think it really delivered. I hate matches where one
   wrestler clearly dominates, only to have the other get the "upset" win.
   Too often it's merely an upset for the sake of having an upset. This was
   one of those cases, IMO. Mysterio wrestled a subpar match, and his use of
   the same old finisher cheapened that move, and the match. It really came
   across as little more than your typical Nitro match. The match meant
   nothing going in, and it means less now that it's done. So Mysterio is
   good ... didn't we already know that?

 - The way they pulled Scott Steiner from the tag match was real cheap. Up
   until the PPV itself, they announced Hall as possibly being there. Then
   instead of making it a handicap match, or flipping a coin between the
   Steiners to see who'd wrestle, they pulled this. Wow ... what a
   coincidence! A least they had a match though, unlike the next night on
   Nitro.

 - Madusa vs. Hokuto. All this did was build a feud that's been bnothing but
   talk. Has Luna Vachon even wrestled since she's arrived in WCW? The
   Women's belt is still in limbo, made meaningless by a champion who only
   defends it on U.S. once soil every six months.

 - Iaukea vs. Regal. See comments about Mysterio match. Where are they going
   with this? Are we supposed to accept Regal vs. Iaukea as a "bitter, on-
   going feud"? This means even less now that the title is no longer
   involved. 

 - Public Enemy vs. Jarrett & McMichael. Haven't we seen this on Nitro?
   Given the boundaries WCW has established for brutality in it's matches,
   we've already seen this go as far as it could prior to this match.

 - Malenko vs. Benoit. A HUGE disappointment. While it was, in and of
   itself, an okay match, it could have been sooooo much better. As I
   predicted last week, this was not only a mediocre match, but it was
   ruined by a mindless Kevin Sullivan run-in. I'm also uneasy about what
   they're doing with Guerrero. WCW's modus operandi lately seems to be
   throwing things up in the air and making us fans run around in circles:
   is he evil? Did he run in to save Woman? Etc.

 - Nash vs. Steiner. I can't really fault this one, as it turned out better
   than I expected. My personal bet is that Scott was pulled from the match
   because the Steiners didn't want to let Nash beat BOTH of them by
   himself.

 - Luger & the Giant vs. Harlem Heat. This too was better than I expected,
   but I really question the idea behind the match. They made it seem like
   it would be an elimination match, but it was really just a standard tag
   match, with the individual scoring the FIRST fall getting the win and
   future title shot. This just made so little sense, in terms of the
   participants and the match rules. They made much ado about the team
   members having to fight each other should they both be tagged in.
   Normally this would be avoided, since they have to make contact before
   one man can tag out. In the context of this match, it would be dumb to
   even tag in both members of a team, since one could pin the other and get
   the easy win. Both teams were tagged in to face each other during the
   course of the match. WCW obviously chose the safe finish and gave Luger
   the win. They made a lot of the fact that he has yet to face Hogan on a
   PPV.

 - Page vs. Savage. Another okay match, but one that lacked any depth. They
   were obviously trying to outdo Hart/Austin from WrestleMania. Savage just
   really seemed to be going through the motions. The finish didn't make all
   that much sense, either. Is it the best thing to do to give Page a fairly
   decisive win when this is really just the start of their feud? With
   Kimberly being attacked, they've now set up a situation where a "win" for
   Page isn't enough. Page would really need to hurt Savage now to get
   totally even. The problem is, things like that just don't happen in WCW.
   At best, we might see a future cage match, or something like that. Page
   would have to leave Savage bloody and unconscious to attain justice, and
   we know THAT won't happen. Apparently Savage is legitimately injured,
   having torn a ligament in his ankle or some such. He didn't even know it
   until he woke up screaming the next morning.

 - The NWO split. Kind of meaningless without Hogan present. I wouldn't
   doubt if this was just to test the waters and see how the fans reacted.
   I just don't think they can run two NWO groups and have them both be
   "heel"-ish in nature. Basically, either Hogan or Nash will have to leave
   the NWO and turn face. This would almost undoubtably be Nash, taking Hall
   and Syxx with him. This is a start (finally!) but it needed a good
   followup. Unfortunately they as much as killed the angle on Nitro, though
   obviously left it open should they decide to go through with it.

 - I predicted Sting wouldn't show up, didn't I? This was really sad given
   how hard they were selling the possibility of him showing up (especially
   on the WCW Pro "countdown" show). I don't think he would have added all
   that much, (since the NWO fracturing was the most signifigant angle of
   the show), but an appearance by him wouldn't have hurt. Sting's absence
   at the last few Nitro's made it seem like PPV's would be the only place
   he'd show up. Now he doesn't even show up for them. What has dragged on
   way too long anyway is now made even more meaningless. Why does Sting
   have to do anything, now that the NWO is self destructing? The whole
   Sting angle now comes off as a seven or eight month temper tantrum on his
   part, with him returning as WCW's "savior" too late. His return the next
   night shows a steady pattern on WCW's part of giving the fans more for
   free on TV than on the shows that they charge you for.

Overall, I'd rate Spring Stampede as somewhat mediocre. Solid as it went
along, but really lacking anything special. So much of the card seemed
insignifigant compared to the average Nitro, and the next night's show in
particular. Definitely a step down from Uncensored. This was, ironically,
their best shot at doing a straight PPV. There were few angles and gimmicks.
Had the undercard offered better wrestling (and it had the wrestlers to do
it) then it would have been a fairly decent PPV. Ultimately, they failed to
show us anything that made it "necessary" that we tune in. Having four title
matches with three goofy endings didn't help. The lack of at least one title
changing hands made the show less memorable. Having Iaukea lose the belt
the next night right there made it the more momentous show. Hogan's absence
was a plus, but lessened the marquee value of the show.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Bottom Line: Why the sudden Dungeon of Doom push? Konan and Morrus will
probably wrestle Steiner and the Giant next week. Why?

I wish they'd hurry up and do whatever it is that they're planning to do
with Teddy Long. They've stretched that out since before Nick Patrick turned
heel. This is about as anticipated as the Renegade's eventual heel turn.

Is Guerrero bound for the Dungeon of Doom? Does anyone care? I still can't
figure out why he's been so far removed from the U.S. Title scene. Speaking
of which, can anyone tell the difference between the U.S., Television and
Cruiserweight Title divisions anymore? All three are held by cruiserweights
and there's been so much crossover that it's all one big mess, with most of
the WCW wrestlers being excluded from contention. Syxx doesn't even defend
the Cruiserweight Title. Both Malenko and Ultimo have been Cruiserweight
Champion, and now each hold the other singles belts. You need a score card
to remember which belt is held by whom. With Hogan rarely defending the
World Title, and the Outsiders rarely defending the Tag Team Titles, there
seems to be little incentive to be a wrestler in WCW.

I just don't buy the High Voltage push. Like Prince Iaukea, WCW is trying
hard to establish them as "major stars". Every time they are mentioned, they
are compared to a "young Harlem Heat". This just goes to show how weak WCW's
tag team division has become, and why pointless feuds are more necessary,
since Hall and Nash don't interract with any regualrity with the other tag
teams.

A vein is started to rise in my neck every time Jarrett and McMichael
walk to the ring. It's starting to look more and more likley that Mongo's
days as a Horseman are numbered.

Hyping the main event then not doing it is just really lame. At least Spring
Stampede came up with a half-assed excuse to make us forget Scott Hall's
absence, and at least RAW showed us a replacement match. It also wasn't so
bad for the PPV since that turned out not to be the main event. The only
real excuse/explanation here is that they were running short on time, which
rings hollow since Nitro has run over the last few weeks. That really made
the Iaukea/Dragon match the main event. Imagine you were going to a house
show: would seeing a thirty second match between those two make you think
you had gotten your money's worth, regardless of the title change?

We've reached another of those points where everything seems up in the air
for both feds. In the WWF, it's anyone's guess as to what's going to happen
and who will have the title by the end of summer. The only thing that's
holding them back is injuries (and behind the scenes fighting). Should
everyone come back healthy, the WWF should have a pretty good summer, and
look solid for the rest of the year.

WCW seems to have set up a lot of things just so they wouldn't have to tie
themselves down to any single one. They appear to have a problem looking
past the next PPV, yet have set up all kinds of things that won't come to
fruition until this summer ... maybe. WCW is laying the seeds for Luger, the
Giant, Sting, Flair, and perhaps even Nash to all be future opponents for
Hogan at future PPV's. Will he ever lose the belt? Who in that short list
will be the one to eventually unseat him, if any? The Flair/Piper/Greene
match seems odd as well. They seem to be indicating that it will be at the
next PPV, Slamboree, yet Flair has been challenging Hogan. Would they really
put a recently injured Flair, a gimpy Piper, and a green Greene in with
Hogan and two of the NWO's best? This would seem to be a good place to use
Rodman, yet he isn't supposed to wrestle (if he ever does) until July. I
wouldn't doubt if McMichael joined the NWO. Even though Luger has earned a
World Title shot, they don't seem to be indicating that it'll be part of
Slamboree. I think Bash at the Beach is the June PPV, so maybe then.

This all could really start to get to be a mess if they don't nail down some
of these angles and storylines soon. The thing this hurts the most is WCW's
ability to sell their PPV's as singular, unique events. It's never a good
idea to try and sell a PPV while you're already hyping the one after that
(and in the process establishing that the subsequent Nitro's are better than
the PPV's). The only way to really sell a PPV is on the strength of it's
main event. In WCW, that almost by necessity involves Hulk Hogan. With all
the things they seem to have in store for Hogan, they would appear to be
booking him on most of the PPV's throughout the summer, meaning they won't
have more than three weeks to hype any given match. The other option is
to remove Hogan from every other PPV, and as was seen by Spring Stampede,
that affects so much of the roster. I think it's time to get the belt from
around his waist. All of his matches seem to be "grudge matches" anyway, so
why must the World Title be mixed up in it?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

This Week's Winner: RAW.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

JRP