[RESULTS/OPINION] WCW Monday Nitro/WWF Monday Night RAW (9/23) WCW Monday Nitro: Live. HOUR ONE: Hosted by Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko & Mike Tenay. - Clip shown of the Macho Man vs. The Giant at Fall Brawl. Schiavone shows a copy of the USA Today which has an ad proclaiming that the NWO will take over tonight's show. - KEVIN SULLIVAN/KONAN (w/ Jimmy Hart) vs. BRAD ARMSTRONG/JUVENTUD GUERRERA Konan wrestles the majority of the match, Sullivan refusing to tag in. Nothing of note happens, with Sullivan eventually tagging in to cover for the pin. Sullivan and Konan then have words, leading to Sullivan and Big Bubba attacking Konan, double teaming on him for a minute, then stopping and telling the camera that this was Konan's initiation into the Dungeon of Doom. They help Konan to his feet and the trio (along with Hart) leave the ring together. Whatever. - Recap of last weeks show, running the clip of the New World Order sitting in their limo planning this week's takeover of WCW. Mike Tenay interviews Randy Savage. Savage says no matter how bad they beat him, he'll be ready to take on Hogan at Halloween Havoc. - MIKE ENOS vs. CHRIS JERICHO Jericho wins. Yawn. Seriously, with all of WCW's talent in Japan, this had the makings of the worst Nitro card ever. Certainly the worst 1st hour, since switching to the 2 hour format. - PAT TANAKA vs. GLACIER (*click*) Let's see if Jessica can solve this week's murder in Cabbot Cove. I bet the guy with the glasses did it. He LOOKS like a murderer (and I think he played one on Matlock last week.) Damn... commercial! (*click*) Glacier wins. - HARLEM HEAT (w/ Sherri & Col. Parker) vs. THE PUBLIC ENEMY The Heat spend nearly a minute trash talking into the camera which got me to thinking "I bet they lose the belts." Call me a liar, but that's the buzz I was getting. The P.E. enter with a table (Larry Zbyszko mentioning that they're making use of a loophole in the rules - you can bring anything you want to the ring, you just can't use it.) In this case, they don't. The P.E. wrestle their standard Bushwhackers-style match, Rocco Rock looking especially bad during a one-on-two segment. Grunge actually carries the match (IMO.) The Heat reel off a few good moves, but the majority of the match seems to be running as if both teams are waiting for something. Rocco eventually (very obviously) backs into a pin attempt. One of the Heat rolls him up for a pin, but Rocco kicks out. Things have really slowed down by this point and they try it again. Rocco is rolled into a small package (making me wonder if this was what they were trying a few moments earlier) and Rocco rolls through, shifting the position of both men's shoulders (reversing it.) Referee Nick Patrick counts the three. Both teams celebrate as the Heat's music starts to play. Patrick ignores the Heat and gives the belt to the P.E., crowning new WCW World Tag Team champions. The Public Enemy will now defend the belts against Hall & Nash at Halloween Havoc. Hmmmm... About this time, the NWO arrive outside... HOUR TWO: Hosted by Eric Bischoff, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan & Mike Tenay. - RANDY "MACHO MAN" SAVAGE vs. GREG "THE HAMMER" VALENTINE Far from being a classic matchup between former Intercontinental champions, this short match actually looked more like what would have passed as an okay enough brawl 10 years ago in the NWA. Have my standards changed that much? Anyway, this spills to the floor fairly quickly. Valentine gets in his quota of shots, then Savage comes back with a chair, causing a DQ. Savage throws the ref out of the ring as the NWO storm the arena. Hall, Nash, Six and Ted DiBiase enter the ring, stomping Savage to the mat. Hall delivers a "Razor's Edge" while Nash does his "Jacknife." Six cheers them on as DiBiase oversees the operation. Miss Elizabeth is shown in the back watching fretfully. Bischoff calls the gang "dirtbags." The Giant arrives, dressed rather nattily, and begins announcing duties on the mic (which he does all night from this point on.) Announcing him as "The Man and the Myth... The Greatest Wrestler That Ever Lived... " out comes "Hollywood Hogan!" The malicious beating of the Macho Man continues. Nash whips Savage with a tasty, spicy beef snack while Hogan laments "He's beating him with a Slim Jim!" Hogan then takes a can of the NWO's GLH spray and paints Savage's bald spot black. Savage is carted of on a stretcher (off camera) as the NWO en masse charge the announcing booth. Bobby Heenan and Mike Tenay flee, but Eric Bischoff is caught and trapped in his seat - held prisoner there for the remainder of the show. Nash manhandles Bischoff, looking very convincing in his threats to pummel him flatter than Georgia asphalt. Hogan announces that now would be a good time to bring or Ted DiBiase's new chief of security: "Vince." Out comes our old pal Virgil, Ted's old WWF lackey and manservant. (Last I heard of Virgil he was in Vegas wrestling a member of the Klan - no joke, that was the angle.) "Vince," as he is now dubbed (a shot too obvious for me to have to explain) takes great pleasure in spending the rest of the night keeping Bischoff in his seat. Following the commercial break, the gang begins making jokes about southerners in general, and NASCAR racing in particular ("rednecks dippin' Skoal driving around in a circle.") They then bring out their latest corporate acquisition, the NWO racing car (#49.) They also claim that next week they'll have Kyle Petty on the show, as he's slated to drive their car. Bischoff meekly asks if they can go back to the action in the ring. - JIM POWERS (w/ Teddy Long) vs. "M." WALLSTREET Hall and Nash make what sound like steroid jokes about Powers. ("He's all juiced up and ready to go. He's stacked. The guys in the gym say he's looking really GOOD!") They announce Wallstreet as "M. Wallstreet." ("A two sport star from Syracuse... .") Bischoff tries to leave, to no avail. Hall and Nash say they're going down to the ring for a closer look. They also joke about Teddy Long putting on weight. Once at ringside Hall and Nash clobber Powers. Wallstreet can be seen quietly (and wisely) leaving the ringside area. Referee Randy Anderson removes his earpiece and leaves as well, saying "this isn't WCW!" Nick Patrick comes out, saying it's his duty to establish order in the ring, and agrees to referee the matches for the NWO. The Giant then dances around the ring a bit, chokeslams Powers, then covers for the pin. Off somewhere in the hallways of the arena we are shown Hulk Hogan, tra-la-la-ing his way about, spraying "NWO" on the walls - all while singing "Hooray for Hollywood!" (Surely one of the most surrealistic moments in wrestling history.) Hogan runs into the Nasty Boys, inviting them to take his room key, sip some bubbly, and talk a little business after the show. They take his key and head off to wait for him. Hogan even hands them his Heavyweight Title belt and asks if they'll take care of it for him. With the suggestion this strong that the Nasty Boys are joining the NWO, you can bet that they tell him to "stick it" next week. - "HACKSAW" JIM DUGGAN vs. RON STUDD They call Studd "a comer," say he won't win any beauty prizes, then beat him up. The NWO music starts up ("The soundtrack from your favorite adult movie... brought to you by the NWO," says Hall) and Six heads to the ring to take on Duggan instead. Duggan pounds Six pillar to post, Six getting in no offense. Eventually the Giant nails Duggan with a really, really weak chokeslam on the floor, rolls him into the ring, Six gets the pin. Somewhere around this time Hogan accidentally calls him "The Kid." - NWO STING vs. BO LEDOUX The crowd cheers for "Sting" until they realize it's the fake. Ledoux is a jobber that Bischoff says the NWO brought with them. NWO Sting quickly beats the stiff, doing a Stinger Splash and the Scorpion Deathlock (Hogan saying it's the best looking one he's ever seen.) - HIGH VOLTAGE vs. THE AMAZING FRENCH CANADIANS Rougeau's bald spot is pointed out. Hall and Nash head to the ring. The Canadians hightail it away midway through their rendition of the Canadian national anthem. To make a long story (and Monday Night Recap) short, Hall and Nash easily win this, the first match in the NWO World Tag Team Title Tournament. No doubt that this will culminate in their match against the Public Enemy at Halloween Havoc. It's at this point that Hogan lays out the entire meaning of the New World Order. Wherever he's gone, Hogan says, he's MADE those particular wrestling organizations. He's created empires, and whenever said federations have stopped following his lead, started to doubt him, he's moved on. This, he says, is what happened to WCW. So he got together with The Outsiders and Ted DiBiase in an effort to put wrestling on the map once again; to create one more empire; and to once and for all prove that Hulk Hogan is THE GREATEST WRESTLER THAT EVER LIVED. Now if that isn't ego, I don't know what is. Whatever the NWO started out as, this is what it is now. (And of course this all comes just minutes after DiBiase said the reason that the NWO works so well together is because they've put their ego's aside.) The show winds down with a replay of the attack on Savage. Hogan mentions a new movie he's starting and that he's letting Nash be in it. Just to end on a truly weird note, Hall asks the Giant "is Andre really your Dad?" - Next week's main event: Not announced. Comments: The inmates have had their run of the asylum, and you can bet that this was nearly it for the NWO. They may get their own show (or an hour of Nitro) but I doubt they'll get this much time again. Obviously it was a good thing they were there, because the card itself was miserable. Even with them there were no good matches. This was chaotic, and fun at times, but a little hard to watch since so much adlib-ing was going on. This was okay when Nash or DiBiase got on the mic, but I could actually FEEL a little of my life force slip away whenever The Giant or Six opened their mouths. Hogan also said "anything less would be too (or 'un-') civilized" too damn many times. Perhaps the best performance was turned in by Bishoff, who looked entirely too convincing as the harried, sick-to-his-stomach hostage. WWF Monday Night RAW: Live. - Quick In Your House: "Mind Games" recap: * Free For All Countdown Show: - Jerry "The King" Lawler debated Mark Henry. Lawler slapped Henry across the face. - Savio Vega defeated Marty Jannetty. Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw attacked Vega after the match. Vega demanded a match between the two. - Dok Hendrix interviewed Sunny (with Jim Cornette putting in an appearance.) - Jim Ross interviewed Mankind and Paul Bearer. * In Your House: "Mind Games:" - Savio Vega defeated Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw in a "Caribbean Strap Match." During the match Vega nearly got into a confrontation with The Sandman (from Extreme Championship Wrestling - ECW. Sandman, Paul E. Dangerously and Tommy Dreamer were at ringside.) - "Razor Ramon" and "Diesel" are shown attacking Savio Vega in a hallway (from the rear, at a lengthy distance away.) - Jose Lothario defeated Jim Cornette. Match lasted about 1 minute. - Brian Pillman interviewd Owen Hart and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. Bret Hart never appeared. - Owen Hart & The British Bulldog defeated The Smoking Gunns. Owen and Davy Boy win the WWF World Tag Team Titles. After the match, Sunny fires the Gunns. Clarence Mason tricked Jim Cornette (who was getting "first aid") into signing over the rights to Owen's/Bulldog's contracts. - Kevin Kelly interviewed Mankind and Paul Bearer. - Mark Henry defeated Jerry "The King" Lawler. Henry (who can't wrestle) finished The King with a one-shoulder back breaker. - The Undertaker defeated Goldust in the "Final Curtain Match." Not as good as previous matches between the two. Undertaker wins via pinfall. - Dok Hendrix interviews Shawn Michaels. - Shawn Michaels defeated Mankind via DQ. Near 30 minute match. Mankind was wheeled to the ring in a coffin. Match went in and out of the ring. Both men went off the top turnbuckle through a table to the floor. Shawn jumped off a chair and Superkicked another chair into Mankind. Shawn was covering for the pin when Vader ran in, causing a disqualification. Shawn dumped Vader out of the ring and he brawled with Sycho Sid (who had come to ringside.) Mankind applied the Mandible Claw and tried to put Michaels in the coffin but The Undertaker appeared from within it. The two brawled to the back as the PPV ended. - Tonight's show starts with stills of the attack on Vega by "Razor" and "Diesel." Jim Ross promises they will be on the show tonight, which we know by now is a hard promise to keep since Scott Hall and Kevin Nash have been on Nitro for at least the last half hour. - "WILDMAN" MARC MERO (w/ Sable) vs. FAAROOQ ASAD (w/ Sunny) It's the final match in the Intercontinental Title Tournament and it was a doozy. Pat Patterson is the special referee. Mr. Perfect is introduced to the crowd prior to the match, and sits in on color commentary. Ahmed Johnson even calls in on the phone to deliver comments. A good match with both men wrestling their own styles and both meshing together nicely. Faarooq sticks to the power moves, while Mero uses his speed, often going aerial. He uses a move Jim Ross called the "Merosault" which had him standing on the top turnbuckle, doing a 180 degree spin in place, then bouncing off backwards and landing an elbow shot. Sunny, at ringside, works to distract the ref. She and Sable exchange words. Patterson then orders Sunny back to the lockerroom. Faarooq then slaps on a headlock, at which point someone at ringside holds up a sign reading "We love restholds." Mero then gets the upper hand, nailing a huracarana (correctly identified as such by Kevin Kelly.) Sunny returns, carrying a purse which she slides into the ring. She and Sable go at it again and for the briefest, most tantalizing of moments, they engage in a catfight. Jim Ross says "the Queens of the WWF are outside the ring!" (Especially true given that Pat Patterson was out there to break it up.) Mero gets hold of the purse, nails Faarooq with it, then drags him over to the corner. After a long setup, he lands the "Wild Thing" (Shooting Star Press.) 1, 2, and 3 and Mero is the new champ. Ross and Perfect enter the ring to congratulate him. Mero gives a warm thanks to his fans, friends and Sable. He thanks Perfect for giving him the pointers needed to win, and calls Jim Ross a "great guy." Cut to a door somewhere in the arena labelled "Razor" and "Diesel." - Tonight, we will see "Double J" Jeff Jarrett exposed. Huh? Clip is shown of Shawn Michaels' IC title victory over Jarrett at the 2nd In Your House in Nashville. They then show footage of Jarrett screwing up while lip synching to his song "With My Baby Tonight." McMahon promises that next week we will see the real man who recorded that song - "The Real Double J." This is, of course, The Roadie (Brian Armstrong) who also goes by the name Jessie James Armstrong (which would make him a "Double J" as well.) Hey, better late than never I always say, since this was the angle they were going to do over a year ago before he and Jarrett quit. - Mero is shown in the lockerroom celebrating with his friends. Oddly enough, all his friends are midcard jobbers (like Bob Holly and the Godwins.) - THE BODY DONNAS vs. OWEN HART/BRITISH BULLDOG (w/ Clarence Mason) Didn't "Body Donnas" used to be one word? And doesn't Skip have a broken back (or neck or something?) Stills are shown of Mason hoodwinking Jim Cornette into signing over the control of his team. The match starts out quick with a few good moves peppered here and there until all of a sudden ECW's Taz (and apparently Bill Alphonso) appear at ringside. Taz is carrying a large sign that reads "SABU IS AFRAID OF TAZ - ECW." Jim Ross identifies him as a wrestler from the local promotion that operates out of a bingo hall. The screen then goes black for a few moments until a commercial starts. Back from the commercial and lest we get the idea that this could be a good match, Owen slaps the Sharpshooter on Zip for the win. Jim Cornette is shown explaining how he had asked Mason to represent him in a lawsuit against Jose Lothario, and instead Mason tricked him into signing away Owen and Bulldog's contracts. - Stills from "Mind Games" are shown. - Footage of The Undertaker shown, walking through a graveyard and planning his vengeance against Mankind. The two will meet October 20th in Indiana at the Market Square Arena for In Your House: "Buried Alive." The match is not sanctioned by the WWF and the loser will be buried in a grave on the floor of the arena. - Dok Hendrix stands ready outside Razor and Diesel's door to do an interview. He tries to go in, but the door is slammed shut, but not before we see an ever so brief shot of Razor's back. Jim Ross says he (Dok) is out of his league and that he'll do the interview later. (These are odd comments from our pal Ross. Could the stress be getting to him? He also mentioned Vince McMahon's being indicted the previous night at the PPV.) - The Sony Playstation Play of the Week is the spot with Shawn and Mankind going through the table at IYH. - HUNTER HEARST HELMSLY vs. THE STALKER A complete "ugh" of a match with Mr. Perfect again stealing the girl at ringside and HHH falling victim to a Superplex off the 2nd turnbuckle. The only saving grace was Steve Austing sitting in for color commentary. Austin says that if he has to get Bret Hart's attention, he'll go to Calgary and hit Stu Hart in the face if need be. - Jim Ross enters the ring to conduct his interview with Razor and Diesel, but is cut off by the running of footage of Mankind in the same cemetary that Undertaker was in earlier. Then it's back to Ross, who starts again but is this time cut off by a commercial break. Jim seems upset. Finally it's back to Jim and his interview with Diesel and Razor. But first, Jim wants to say something. He says it will make the fans question his loyalty to the WWF. "Well... I have no loyalty to the WWF!" Ross says. He tells of how he left, as he put it, "The Atlanta Falcons of the National Football League to come here to the 'recognized leader in Sports Entertainment.'" His first assignment was WrestleMania IX, where they made him wear a toga. "The NFL for a toga - it's crap!" He then asserts that he alone carried the 1993 King of the Ring announcing team. He then says that he disappeared because the owner of the WWF "you know who I'm talking about... Vince McMahon" was jealous of his talents. Ross then awoke SuperBowl Sunday in 1994 to find himself afflicted with Bell's Palsy, the affliction which causes the left side of his face to droop. What did McMahon do? "On February 11th, he fired my ass!" How was Jim going to tell his wife and two little girls that he'd been fired? He calls Connecticut a Hellhole. Then when McMahon was indicted, they brought Ross back in to host RAW, then fired him again. They hired him yet again, this time paying "50 cents on the dollar" to work in the front office. "Do you think all these huys leaving the WWF has been a coincidence ? All these guys coming in? I'VE been BUSY!" Ross then introduces Razor Ramon. The crowd is stunned. The announcers are stunned. Out comes a close facsimile to the old Ramon, wearing the same ring gear, same music, same hair, beard, chains and toothpick. But it isn't Scott Hall. Kelly tries to say that it's not Ramon, but seems to be thunderstruck. "How's it feel to be back in the World Wrestling Federation?" "Hey... Chico... get ready... for the Bad Guy!" Savio Vega then storms the ring and the two exchange blows as the show fades to black. - Next week's main event: Shawn & Jose vs. Vader & Cornette. Comments: A true shocker of a RAW. Of all the guys in the WWF, Jim Ross was the last I'd expected to turn heel (and that's including all the setup for it, which now becomes painfully obvious in hindsight.) Ross takes credit for a lot of wrestlers leaving, as well as the new ones coming in. Could this be the angle from this point on: Ross using his connections to bring in new guys to humiliate the WWF? Where do the ECW guys fit into this (or was their appearances a one-shot deal while in Pennsylvania?) I've no clue yet as to how they're going to play this out, but they have to be pretty careful so that it doesn't become too much like another NWO. The Mero/Faarooq match was great, and would have been the second best match had it been on the PPV. Bottom line: Talk about both groups turning it up a notch. However, neither upcoming PPV looks all that promising. WCW has to start scoring some payback soon, and I'll bet the effectiveness of the NWO goes down fast from there. For the WWF it's yet another In Your House, and another situation where the happenings on RAW seem to be setting up the PPV after that (which would be Survivor Series.) Some may recall that back in '93 the WWF ran a Smoky Mountain match on the Survivor Series. Could we see an ECW match this year? Taz vs. Sabu maybe? One can hope (dream... .) I actually paid for this IYH (and enjoyed it) but I don't forsee getting the next one (given the lineup hinted at thus far,) This week's winner: RAW. I'd have given it to Nitro had there actually been any wrestling shown. JRP